1BlackSheep
Well-known member
I'm the same way and HATE that feeling! The day when I don't totally feel this way in a relationship is the day I'll have found "the one"!
Are you ready for a relationship?
- Thread starter Sinopia
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LazyHermitCrab
Well-known member
I'm in a relationship with an amazing person, but it's so hard. I always feel like crap when he asks me what i'm doing and i have nothing interesting to say 
i have no idea why he bothers staying with me but i'm sure he will leave eventually if I can't change. People want to stay away from me because they sense something wrong with me and it has made me realized how pathetic my life is compared to people with family, friends, who actually enjoy socializing, who have passions. I'm just i dunno lost and as i get older it just gets worse.. Don't know what's gonna happen :S
i have no idea why he bothers staying with me but i'm sure he will leave eventually if I can't change. People want to stay away from me because they sense something wrong with me and it has made me realized how pathetic my life is compared to people with family, friends, who actually enjoy socializing, who have passions. I'm just i dunno lost and as i get older it just gets worse.. Don't know what's gonna happen :S
recluse
Well-known member
No. And i have not been ready last year, the year before, and the years before that which is why i have never even dated at the age of 31, still a virgin too obviously.
The reasons are extensive;
I am average looking which is not bad in itself but when you don't have the social skills to compensate you get overlooked by everyone.
I am way too moody, i can be depressed one minute and elated the next.
I have poor social skills as mentioned before, it's not just a case of feeling anxious it's that i have no clue what to talk about with people.
I would worry that the girl would cheat and find other men attractive.
I can't get a stable life in order; Job which lasts etc.
I am way too serious a lot of the time, unable to laugh etc o'r make funny jokes/comments.
I am a hermit, don't really go out other than when i have to. I'm not into parties and things.
The reasons are extensive;
I am average looking which is not bad in itself but when you don't have the social skills to compensate you get overlooked by everyone.
I am way too moody, i can be depressed one minute and elated the next.
I have poor social skills as mentioned before, it's not just a case of feeling anxious it's that i have no clue what to talk about with people.
I would worry that the girl would cheat and find other men attractive.
I can't get a stable life in order; Job which lasts etc.
I am way too serious a lot of the time, unable to laugh etc o'r make funny jokes/comments.
I am a hermit, don't really go out other than when i have to. I'm not into parties and things.
ForeverTheWeirdKid
Well-known member
I'm ready for success, relationships are not constructive.
MikeyC
Well-known member
Or maybe he's sticking around because he likes you just the way you are.
positivechange
Member
I am not ready for a relationship. I feel like me ever being relationship material is an uphill battle. It would mean putting a lot of work into improving myself. I know exactly what I need to do but I have a deep aversion to actually doing any of it.
If that wasn't enough, I have the hurdle of actually starting a career. I have a 3.5 year gap after high school where I didn't do anything. I have no idea how to explain that to an employer in an interview.
Even if it everything works out, I could probably only be with another person who is at least very shy. Which I would be happy with. It would be too much to expect a normal outgoing person to tolerate my odd behavior.
If that wasn't enough, I have the hurdle of actually starting a career. I have a 3.5 year gap after high school where I didn't do anything. I have no idea how to explain that to an employer in an interview.
Even if it everything works out, I could probably only be with another person who is at least very shy. Which I would be happy with. It would be too much to expect a normal outgoing person to tolerate my odd behavior.
Bustn Justin
Well-known member
I am definately not ready for a relatioonship.
I need to stop hating myself first.
I need to stop hating myself first.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Same here.
razzle dazzle rose
Well-known member
I am in a relationship now, and it is like an experiment almost... That is because we are both inexperienced and don't really know what we are doing. But we love each other and are trying to make it work. I do have *lots* of issues to work out though - it does make things more...complicated. Sometimes I feel bad for all the crap he has to put up with.
HermitLeftCave
Member
I am ready for a relationship. I think I've become mature enough and stable enough for a relationship to work on my end. There are a few problems, though. One problem is that I have different interests than most folk. For example I like to read and go hiking, but I don't watch much TV. Another big problem is that I don't have much experience dealing with the opposite sex. And the biggest problem of all: I don't meet people.
Labyrinthine
Well-known member
I'm not certain I'm meant for relationships.
I have only been in one, but it was really, really bad. Since that not-so-lovely experience, I've only met guy "friends" (and acquaintances, but definitely not actual boyfriends) that started getting super possessive. Figure I can't attract a normal bloke.
I have only been in one, but it was really, really bad. Since that not-so-lovely experience, I've only met guy "friends" (and acquaintances, but definitely not actual boyfriends) that started getting super possessive. Figure I can't attract a normal bloke.
It depends, not right away. If the person I love is really close to me and I can trust them. Like if we were soul mates and connected easily and fast. Soul mates, you usually know right away and they are a lot like you.
If I was going to date someone different. Someone I didn't know, and was shy with (like with most people), it would take awhile. It all depends on how we connect and stuff.
If I was going to date someone different. Someone I didn't know, and was shy with (like with most people), it would take awhile. It all depends on how we connect and stuff.
Hellhound
Super Moderator
I am in a relationship, but I have a lot of concerns. He's really understanding of my issues, but I don't have confidence. Due to people betraying and abandoning me in the past, I can't get the idea that he'll get tired of me out of my mind. He knows this, he reassures me all the time, but I hope I'm not bothering him too much with it. Once we meet in person, if things work out, all of this might decrease... I might start feeling more at ease.
Bo592
Well-known member
No because I can`t drive I can`t get a job because I can`t make it to a job. I can`t go online because I don`t drive I can`t make it to the date.I don`t thank a women would like me for showing up in a Bus or a Taxi Cab. people who are wanting to try a dating site out and sure if They should or not. I thank the only thing that important is that you have to be able to make the date. plus I feel I have to get rid of my nervousness around people. not ready want to be but not.
OceanMist
Well-known member
That guy doesn't know what he's talking about. He operates under the "everyone must be like me" mindset, which is really annoying btw.
I hate it when people say someone needs to be more experienced. The only way to get experience is trial and error through trying dating and relationships. Therefore, you must start somewhere, or you'll never get anywhere.
To get experience.....you must get experience.
Anyway, the whole experience thing isn't the be and end all of having a healthy relationship. It depends on the individuals involved in the relationship.
Example: I'm sure there are times on this earth when a woman who is inexperienced with relationships has fallen in love when she's in her 40s and had a successful marriage with a guy. Experience doesn't always = maturity.
I think you should stop worrying about being alone.
Imo, getting married and having children doesn't sound like all it cracked up to be. I get why some people may like it, but I really don't see why one should worry about not having children that they have to have a ton of responsiblity for.
It's okay to desire a man and children, but to worry about.....I think that's a waste.
I'm not ready be in a romantic relationship too. I'm also emotionally unstable; my mood can be very unpredictable, but I don't express it outwardly of course so people don't notice. Right now I'm in my 20s and I think it's still too early; I will not consider romance until I reach my 30s, and even if I don't find somebody, it's ok because I'm not desperate.
LookingForward
Well-known member
Wise words... love and romance give the same exhilarating feeling no matter what age you are so there is no time constraint on finding it.
Personally I think obsessing on finding love and romance is the most counter productive thing a person can do, love is something that just happens, it can't be forced...
takeheart
Well-known member
To be quite frankly, I’m not ready either but when opportunity comes to be in one, I will take it. Yes I’m scared to socialise and stuff but sometimes you got to do what you got to do. If a girl likes me, I’m hell ready to take her to be mine! Though it probably won’t last because of my unsocial ways but I don’t give a damn. Life is short; you might as well have relationship now if you have a chance too! Don’t say “oh I will have one in 5 years time blah blah I’m not ready”..NO! Do it now because you don’t know what tomorrow brings. You don’t want to die without experiencing a romantic relationship! Well I certainly don’t want to yano!