Would you get married?
- Thread starter Moonie
- Start date
dangerdave
Member
I would love to marry someday, but I was recently broke up with on proposal, and I worry that it will affect future relationships.
I've always wanted to get married, and in June 2007 I did
I married the most wonderful man I have ever known. It was a smaller wedding, about 100 people or so. The ceremony was in the church we attended at the time in the afternoon, then the reception was right afterwards in a party hall maybe 20 mins away. It was a fun reception, it was dry...but good food, music, etc.If I could go back...I would have done a lot of things differently. 1) Hire a better photographer. We got a deal by hiring one of hubby's friends....bad idea.... 2) Don't let people rush me through my day!! My dad was complaining afterwards about how long the pictures were taking, which I think contributed to the poor quality of pictures. The pictures didn't even take that long, he is just very impatient. I will not let him do that at my sisters' weddings! 3) Don't stress and argue with fiance as much. I didn't stress that much, but I wish I was more mature and knew how to put my foot down and say "no, this is our day, we want it this way" instead of letting my mom guilt me into doing things I didn't want. 4) Don't consentrate on my stuttering when I say the vows. This is one of my biggest regrets of the whole day. I was so worried about stuttering on the vows, I didn't even think about what I was saying. Ugh!! That was so stupid of me...the only people who would have heard were my hubby and the bridal party.
Oops, that was long. Oh well! Maybe there's some helpful hints for future brides/grooms
lunarla
Well-known member
I think it's possibly for me to marry around my late 20's or early 30's after being with someone for a long time. I honestly don't understand people who get married after dating for like 4 months. It wouldn't be made out to be a big deal for me, no ceremony. Wouldn't even have to be put on a piece of paper to legitimize it either. I just think the thought of rings is cute, I don't know.
As the years passes by I think that it will never happen and that sometimes makes me very sad. I would like to get married someday..but at the moment it is very hard for me to even have a relationship with someone. But If I ever get married I would like to have private ceremony with only my parents, brother, closest friends..and that is not only because of SA.
davidburke
Well-known member
if i do find the right person i defiantly would
iamthenra
Well-known member
If I could I would get married in a heartbeat. But like allot of people with SA, I feel that there is no way that I will ever meet enough women to find someone. I mean I am 41 and only 3 dates in my entire life??? I don't think it is in my future, which makes me incredibly depressed. If I was lucky enough to find "the one", I would have what ever kind of wedding my fiance would want. Of course I would prefer an outdoor wedding with just immediate family very small and very casual and very inexpensive, because I see no point in spending thousands upon thousands of dollars for just a ceremony. To me it doesn't make any sense spending money on something like a birthday or a funeral or Christmas for that matter...
ffeev223234
Well-known member
okay, you do not have to marry someone to show how much you love the person. I see the entire process of doing that rather silly. Setting up wedding cost lots of money! The person likely to pay for the wedding would be you, your lover and someother people; but, why go through that ordeal. You will feel the same way towards that other person you loved the falling day, month, or year.
From my standpoint, whether husband and wive or boyfriend or girlfriend, the two lovers will have the same feelings towards each other no matter the what names are attach to them.
From my standpoint, whether husband and wive or boyfriend or girlfriend, the two lovers will have the same feelings towards each other no matter the what names are attach to them.
FriendlyShadow
Well-known member
I don't think I'll be tend to plan a marriage ever, however, if I had an idea for the marriage I'd like to celebrate in somewhere in a beautiful forest or castle. I think I want to make it a private ceremony though. I'd be too uncomfortable and anxious around numerical people. As for now, I wouldn't do it(and at least not in a very young age.)
A Many Splendored Thing
Well-known member
I wouldn't marry. There is no need to. A couple can choose to be together simply because they want to.
I'm more inclined to be a bachelor for life though.
I'm more inclined to be a bachelor for life though.
theslowesthand
Banned
I've always fought against all that "common" stuff.
But things are getting pretty grim & desperate right now in my life. If i do somehow manage to get through this "phase" in my life, and out the other side (out of the long, dark tunnel), and start "a new beginning" which is kind of my main project right now (have a done a thread on it) ... well the things i think required for "a new beginning" are fairly substantial changes for me, and change f**cks me up big-time ... but if i could somehow manage to handle those changes, then i would fear less the idea of having a partner, and maybe even marriage.
Basically i think i've just had a gutsful of being alone, lonely, bored, depressed, etc (probably had two lifestimes worth of gutsful actually). And desperate times calls for desperate measures. If i'm starting to think "quite fondly" of the idea of premature death, and i'm quickly losing my fear of such, well then i think the fear of having a partner, and even living with them, pales in comparison. I think that's what it may take with me to get a partner - to have essentially no other options left in life, and even be right at death's door???. Just seems to be the way my life is. Perhaps some necessarily life-lessons for my soul??.
But things are getting pretty grim & desperate right now in my life. If i do somehow manage to get through this "phase" in my life, and out the other side (out of the long, dark tunnel), and start "a new beginning" which is kind of my main project right now (have a done a thread on it) ... well the things i think required for "a new beginning" are fairly substantial changes for me, and change f**cks me up big-time ... but if i could somehow manage to handle those changes, then i would fear less the idea of having a partner, and maybe even marriage.
Basically i think i've just had a gutsful of being alone, lonely, bored, depressed, etc (probably had two lifestimes worth of gutsful actually). And desperate times calls for desperate measures. If i'm starting to think "quite fondly" of the idea of premature death, and i'm quickly losing my fear of such, well then i think the fear of having a partner, and even living with them, pales in comparison. I think that's what it may take with me to get a partner - to have essentially no other options left in life, and even be right at death's door???. Just seems to be the way my life is. Perhaps some necessarily life-lessons for my soul??.
ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
Yes, I would get married. I hope to be married one day! As far as the ceremony that would largely depend on my fiancee and what she wanted. Personally, I would want a small gathering of just family and close friends...or, we could elope and take our vows somewhere very romantic.
Richey
Well-known member
Definitely not the big cliched, expensive ceremony, it just feels too cliched and doesn't appeal to me, but a couple of friends, parents, brothers and sisters, aunties. smallish ceremony, outside/inside/whatevs. easily
As for the ceremony, Its expensive, the whole days just feels completely desparate, as in "look, we're a couple", "buy us lots of gifts". "We aren't religious but lets do it because everyone else seems to".
As for the ceremony, Its expensive, the whole days just feels completely desparate, as in "look, we're a couple", "buy us lots of gifts". "We aren't religious but lets do it because everyone else seems to".
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LoyalXenite
Well-known member
Considering im engaged, i hope very much so that i get married
I used to be really against the idea.
But something's changed.
Now I honestly wouldn't care either way.
I would do it if it was important to the girl I was with.
If getting married was something that they always wanted.
If she wanted to get married.
I loved her.
And if I'm ever lucky enough to have somebody feel that strongly about me.
then why the **** not? *shrug*
Probably not the proper wedding attitude though right? heh
But something's changed.
Now I honestly wouldn't care either way.
I would do it if it was important to the girl I was with.
If getting married was something that they always wanted.
If she wanted to get married.
I loved her.
And if I'm ever lucky enough to have somebody feel that strongly about me.
then why the **** not? *shrug*
Probably not the proper wedding attitude though right? heh
selon
Well-known member
Yes yes yes I don't think about it in terms og religion, legal contracts and what not. It's more the promise that you make to one another (heterosexuals and gays) to spend the rest of your lives together that counts. Granted, many marriages today don't work that way anymore but the idea remains!!
I don't think about it in terms og religion, legal contracts and what not. It's more the promise that you make to one another (heterosexuals and gays) to spend the rest of your lives together that counts. Granted, many marriages today don't work that way anymore but the idea remains!!