GraybeardGhost
Well-known member
So every few months I play a card game with some friends. It's a traditional card game that requires exactly four people. If five are present, then the person dealing the cards just passes that turn.
So some time ago they asked in a WhatsApp group who'd be up for the next evening. And I didn't know whether I'd be, so I thought "reply later", and I thought that some time later, and forgot. And then I read that they're four, and thought "oh, ok, they're four already then". And so they meet this evening. And two minutes after it's the time to meet, a buddy phones me and asks me whether I join. Because they thought they would join. But I sit here in my comfy pants, after a long work day, a huge pot of tea. And I don't feel like now getting dressed in decent clothes, throw away the tea and bicycle through the winter night. But if I don't do that, then the other two friends went to the third one for basically nothing, because they're then just three people and can't play the game.
And now I feel shitty about it, because I have the feeling that I'm the one who destroyed their evening, despite nobody ever asking me whether I'd join...
Comfy pants and tea vs. winter night? In my book, the pants win every time. If other people said they were going to go and then bailed, that's not your fault. They can always play something else. I realize I'm responding to this a bit late, and you've surely already decided what to do and done it, but for future reference, there's my two cents.