I agree with that. For me running is about sanity. It is one of the few times I feel whole and sane, equal and not defined by my anxiety. I've spent the last year or so fearing getting out the door for a run, hoping not to be seen, dealing with paranoia and agoraphobia, but I get out the door an run anyway. My will to run is stronger than fear.
Running is the outcome of my battle to survive haemochromatosis, panic disorder and knee pain. I worked hard to beat panic disorder, to walk without knee pain. Running is my miracle, I survived, I am alive and still fighting and trying. That is what running is for me, a sweet relief from the hostile world of people, the anger, the hostility, the jealousy, the intolerance, the labels.
That guy in the cartoon has cyclists legs or perhaps sprinters legs.
I agree with that. For me running is about sanity. It is one of the few times I feel whole and sane, equal and not defined by my anxiety. I've spent the last year or so fearing getting out the door for a run, hoping not to be seen, dealing with paranoia and agoraphobia, but I get out the door an run anyway. My will to run is stronger than fear.
Running is the outcome of my battle to survive haemochromatosis, panic disorder and knee pain. I worked hard to beat panic disorder, to walk without knee pain. Running is my miracle, I survived, I am alive and still fighting and trying. That is what running is for me, a sweet relief from the hostile world of people, the anger, the hostility, the jealousy, the intolerance, the labels.
That guy in the cartoon has cyclists legs or perhaps sprinters legs.
Exercising just feels good. When I feel like absolute trash, I lift weights or do some pushups and whatever I was worrying about doesn't seem so important anymore.
Today at work I was told that the secretary had thought I was on vacation because she couldn't remember seeing me and then my boss responded, "Well she might as well be on vacation with how quiet she is."
My coworkers at the table then began to agree and tell me how they never notice when I'm in the room with them and how they've only heard me talk when I'm around a certain person.
This was said to me in the middle of a very stressful day, my first day after being promoted to a position of more authority and responsibility. How am I supposed to have any confidence in myself, knowing that this is the common opinion of me? I already think about being gone every day, so it doesn't help to hear that I'm basically invisible as it is.
Today at work I was told that the secretary had thought I was on vacation because she couldn't remember seeing me and then my boss responded, "Well she might as well be on vacation with how quiet she is."
My coworkers at the table then began to agree and tell me how they never notice when I'm in the room with them and how they've only heard me talk when I'm around a certain person.
This was said to me in the middle of a very stressful day, my first day after being promoted to a position of more authority and responsibility. How am I supposed to have any confidence in myself, knowing that this is the common opinion of me? I already think about being gone every day, so it doesn't help to hear that I'm basically invisible as it is.
Agreed. And then this morning I woke to a text from my older friend I'd babysit for, whose son loved me! She said she found a new sitter and wanted his car seat and house key back. She asked me to come over tomorrow night (thinking I have no life and don't need more than a day notice) and help her by giving her advice on a college project. I lied and told her I had plans, I never want to see her again honestly. People only like me when they can get something from me. That's true about my ex, my coworkers, even my parents who are constantly borrowing money from me. I'm not even a real f***ing person; I don't exist.
Agreed. And then this morning I woke to a text from my older friend I'd babysit for, whose son loved me! She said she found a new sitter and wanted his car seat and house key back. She asked me to come over tomorrow night (thinking I have no life and don't need more than a day notice) and help her by giving her advice on a college project. I lied and told her I had plans, I never want to see her again honestly. People only like me when they can get something from me. That's true about my ex, my coworkers, even my parents who are constantly borrowing money from me. I'm not even a real f***ing person; I don't exist.
Wow wtf. Why would she do that? She must not realize she offended you somehow because i don't get why she would tell you that and then ask for help on a project.
I feel like a weird creature that belongs nowhere, alone in a vast and confusing reality. In other words, disconnected. Maybe that's why sci-fi sounds good right now.
It's weird - I have a mild cold and while I have that general tired and sick feeling, it doesn't feel awful; I actually feel more relaxed than usual and kind of... good. And I haven't taken any cold medication (but I feel like I have!). Bizaaaaaaaaaaaaarre.
Those who develop so-called mental disorders are those who are sensitive, which is viewed in Western culture as oversensitivity. Indigenous cultures don’t see it that way and, as a result, sensitive people don’t experience themselves as overly sensitive. In the West, “it is the overload of the culture they’re in that is just wrecking them,” observes Dr. Somé. The frenetic pace, the bombardment of the senses, and the violent energy that characterize Western culture can overwhelm sensitive people.
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