How are you feeling?

[Nanita]

Sore throat AGAIN. Maybe I have to accept that my throat is always gonna be like this, instead of complaining about it.
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I hate when random people look at me, it makes me want to stay inside.
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Afraid to text an old friend who moved to my town, I know she´s expecting me to get in touch this week, but I feel so nervous about it.
-

 

[Nanita]

Thanks guys, had another day like this today. I did try to talk to a few people today which was awkward as hell but still I tried. Anyway I'm feeling invisible again, not to mention lonely. Meh I don't know when I'll get rid of this awful feeling.

Sometimes it gets better after while, and you look back at the horrible time thinking "I can´t believe I felt that bad about coming here?". So I hope this will be the case for you.

 

[Nanita]

Feeling conflicted. School is starting soon and this will be my last year in college. However, I've been hearing from people that they couldn't get jobs because they're overqualified. I already have an associate's degree. As crazy as it sounds, I am considering dropping out this semester and finding a job first. Then I might consider completing my bachelor's. My school hasn't given me financial aid yet so there's still time to drop out. I chose to go to college because I thought it would help me find a job, but it looks like employers prefer to pinch pennies and hire cheap candidates. My job experience is almost nil, but I do have volunteer experience much of which is in the hospital which I would rather NOT talk about because I was pre-health/nursing at that time.

That is a difficult situation. I hope you will make a choice that feels right for you.

 

[sahxox]

worn out. It'd be nice to be able to take a vacation from your own head lol

 

[Graeme1988]

Depression's back wi' a vengence noo... F**kin' hate it! Feelin' hellish. Irritable. Anxious. Unhappy. :sad: A clusterf**k o' coflicting emotions which for the sake o' ma family, ah keep tae masel'. :alone: Sure, it's no' the best idea but it keep up appearances. Y'know, the fake smile n' aw that "happy" sh**e...? Because if ah flee off the handle n' verbally snap, am gonnae end tellin' folk what ah really think. And fur a family as dysfunctional as mine, that's a f**kin' bad idea!

 

[Opaline]

^ Thanks Kiwong. I'm actually feeling loads better since then, after getting a few more hours of sleep. I fell back asleep around 7 and actually stayed asleep. My head and body don't ache nearly as bad and my throat doesn't hurt either. Sucks though that the pain starts to come back once I start moving around. I'll be taking it easy today.

It's funny, when I'm well I often feel like being lazy, but the minute I'm sick and I have to rest, it's the last thing I want to do. It doesn't make any sense.

Glad you're feeling better, Phoenixx.

I wish I could say the same! My two younger sisters got much more mild colds. I always get them the worst. I don't understand it. I wonder if it's because of my stress and anxiety, maybe they compromise my immune system :idontknow: Either way, I kept waking up during the night because my nose was so blocked and today I have a slamming headache and can't breathe and I feel miserable, ugh. It's a blanket, hot tea, eat whatever I want, and color my new Hello Kitty coloring book day :3 lol

About not wanting to rest - I know what you mean. I feel like since I'm taking off work I should be getting things done, but I really shouldn't. bleh

 

[gummybear22]

i'm one no one wants to sit next to, talk to, or work with. just because i'm not as social as others doesn't mean if they did, it'd be a horrible experience. i don't want to change myself cuz most of me likes me. but sometimes, it'd be nice to be a part of regular human interaction. i'm alone, surrounded by people.

 

[Lou-s-Darkness]

Just started my first day of the semester...I have a year left thank god. I don't know how much more I can take of this whole 'meet new people, interact and try to pass' dillema haunting me for the rest of my days. I have a headache and the only friend I know was placed in another group so now I'm literally alone and very out of place in a severly interactive group...I just wish people liked me enough to at least talk to me and see me as one of them; a human being.

 

[jaim38]

I don't get how some people could pretend to help me with my issues, nudging me to take a college course because it could be good for me, then go behind my back and say "f**k her". Then they play friendship songs and hope that I have a good impression of them. I am tired of it this two-faced charade. It's like somebody playing 'good cop bad guy'.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

I can't go on being single much longer.........But being a fugly unemployed loser isn't doing much to help with my eligibility.

 

[A86]

I am feeling frightened...

starting to think a lot about the past and having some regrets (not anything I have done, but the opportunities and things I didn't do). I can see this type of continual thinking leading to depressive feelings.
Difficult enough feeling anxious most of the time, the thought of becoming depressed too scares the hell out of me.
I need a distraction... something to occupy me in the present.

 

[dottie]

i feel you ^

 

[Phoenixx]

Feeling a little anxious about tomorrow. It's going to be a long day. I have my nutrition appointment tomorrow afternoon, and since it's a bit of a drive I'll be gone most of the day. Then afterwards I'll only be home for a couple hours, only to go back out again to my aunt's for dinner. My cousin just got back from Japan last week and I haven't seen him in nearly two years. I'm excited to see him again, but I'm not really looking forward to being around the rest of the family. They don't treat me like they used to, thankfully, but I still can never seem to feel right around them. Even anxiety aside, they exhaust me because they're so outgoing and I'm not.

I'm also bracing myself for comments about my weight. I'm sure some will be thrown in my direction, about how much I've apparently lost. It's not like I even lost a ton of weight, it just seems that way because my frame is so small. It's not like I'm THAT self-conscious of my body, I just really hate the attention I've been getting. Just a couple weeks ago I saw a former friend's mom while I was out and the first thing she said wasn't even hi but, "Wow you've lost a lot of weight!" Just the other day too, when I was shopping and trying on clothes and couldn't seem to get anything right away that wasn't too big, my mom made a comment about how she just wants to feed me donuts/fattening foods. These types of comments make me feel like I'm some sort of anorexic. :kickingmyself: It's not my fault I'm small framed, and it certainly isn't my fault I've lost some weight this year. That's sort of what happens when you have the types of health issues I do. Ugh, people... and the things I hate about being female. mg:

 

[dottie]

angry.

7890

 

[dottie]

shower number ???? today - #ocd

clearly feeling out of control.
...i cannot.

 

[LoyalXenite]

Warring with all my emotions. Im really struggling with my misery today. Part of me wants to call up the ex-friend my ex-fiance is sleeping with and abuse him for breaking his word to me and ruining any chance of a friendship and potential rekindling of the relationship. I hate him so much i just want to hurt him, the only reason i dont is because it would hurt her.
No matter what i still cant hurt her.

 

[jaim38]

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/08/09/o...share&goback=.gde_68785_member_264942999&_r=0

I hate it when people try to do this to me. I can live life just fine without their nudging me thank you very much. In fact before college, I was very active. I don't need those people to tell me what to do. If they could just mind their own business, that would great. But when they keep on trying to dictate my life, I feel like resisting even more, and I might eventually do some drastic out of the blue.

 

[dottie]

@loyal horrible. i'm sorry.

 

[dottie]

batsh!t obsessive

 

[Graeme1988]

Warring with all my emotions.

Same here, though am goin' through a different situation. Still very much at war wi' masel'. Anyway, sorry yer feelin' like that right now, Loyal. Hope ye feel better soon, darlin'. :thumbup:

Am also feelin' really anxious n' uncomfortable because ma older sister comin' tae stay fur a few day. And she always starts an argument over the stupidest things, or usually does. So it's probably fur the best that ah keep ma gob firmly shut up and no' say anythin' that's likely tae provoke a hostile reaction - wi' me that normally happens, anyway. But ah don't want tae f**kin' snap n' flee off the hand, verbally, masel'. As much as ah'd like tae...