How are you feeling?

vexatiousmind

vexatiousmind

Well-known member
why can I never feel accomplished?

I studied all day, except when I went to school to do my lab, and workout class.

but I still feel like I did not do enough.:(

I guess I could still be studying, but I think I am gonna go watch a movie or something:p
 
Lostinthemusic

Lostinthemusic

Well-known member
I'm feeling weak, cowardly, stupid, socially inept, like life is far too long (but not suicidal, don't worry that much), self absorbed yet hating myself and hating myself more for either being or thinking I'm being self absorbed.

I'm worried my roommates will hear me typing, wonder what the **** I'm doing and will think I'm weird, which they have to already think. I've barely talked to any of them for 2 weeks, yet I continue to hang out even though I have to take badly disguised breaks from not being social in a social setting. Its ****ing exhausting. I stay in bed most of the day and I'm still tired at midnight, but I cant go to bed because I feel completely skill-less. Even my drumming seems worse, and thats the one thing I thought I could do in front of people even better. My motivation is gone. i don't know what I'm doing. I don't care, but I despair because of it, so I obviously care about that, but that isn't what I want to care about.

I'm ****ing bad at everything and I despise myself for saying it.

I feel like my mental faculties have left me. But I use words that "prove" otherwise.

I'm worried about ice cream scoops.
I worry I don't recognize them if they are there and I worry about what is if they aren't.

I wish I knew myself. That is the only thing I want right now.

Damn I wish I was't such a wimp.
 
U

userremoved

Guest
vexatiousmind said:
why can I never feel accomplished?

I studied all day, except when I went to school to do my lab, and workout class.

but I still feel like I did not do enough.:(

I guess I could still be studying, but I think I am gonna go watch a movie or something:p
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Im kinda like this. I always feel theres something else I should be doing. Anyways, as long as you're doing good, then go ahead and pat yourself on the back and allow yourself time to do something you enjoy.
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Bored, lonely, ignored and depressed. Socially inept as usual. I've started to self harm again, which is bad. ::(: Also I don't have the motivation to do anything right now, as much as I'd like to.
 
A

Agent_Violet

Well-known member
Graeme1988 said:
Bored, lonely, ignored and depressed. Socially inept as usual. I've started to self harm again, which is bad. ::(: Also I don't have the motivation to do anything right now, as much as I'd like to.
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:( you know hurting yourself isn't going to make things better. it'll only leave you with scars you remind you of how bad you feel.

i'm not sure how you're hurting yourself but i was a cutter for most of my teen years and didn't stop til my twenties when i hit a vein and had to be taken to the emergency room. you don't want to get to that point.

PM me if you need someone to talk to
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Agent_Violet said:
:( you know hurting yourself isn't going to make things better. it'll only leave you with scars you remind you of how bad you feel.

i'm not sure how you're hurting yourself but i was a cutter for most of my teen years and didn't stop til my twenties when i hit a vein and had to be taken to the emergency room. you don't want to get to that point.

PM me if you need someone to talk to
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I know it won't make things better. I'm just feeling overwhelmed at the moment. I might PM you later and talk.
 
superfluouslyme

superfluouslyme

1
Eh. I could be better, but I could be worse. I think I sprained or pulled something in my left hand (and it had nothing to do with porn, coyote! :)). I'm seeing Dr. Cop today. I suppose we'll end up talking about how my interview went and how they didn't call me back and how I should keep up the momentum and keep applying for jobs even though I'm not positive I'm ready. :\ I guess that's what therapy is for.
 
awkwardamanda

awkwardamanda

Well-known member
Nervous. Nauseated.::(: My mom gave me a message yesterday that one of the tellers from our bank called and wants me to call her back.:confused: I have no idea what it's about but I always think the worst and worry that my account was hacked or something. (For the record, I don't do any internet banking and the once in a while that I buy something online, I'm careful. I keep my computer malware-free.) Maybe it's just because of the amount of money in my account, they'll just suggest I set up a separate account or something. I have no idea what else it could be. Dammit, I hate makeing phone calls. I'm dreading this.::(: I'm gonna get nothing done because I'm gonna stress over this all afternoon and put it off. And my mom is home so I'm gonna have get the cordless phone and hide in my room.:confused:
 
Falkor

Falkor

1
twiggle said:
The first step towards achieving a dream is to identify it, and you've done that part! You know what you want... a lot of people don't. You can do everything you want to, those are all dreams and aspirations that I know you can reach because even in the few months I've been on this forum you seem to have made so much progress.

The worst thing you can do though is to compare yourself to what you see of other people. I used to get worked up about the same thing... FB makes me feel like a loser occasionally, but then I read somebody on another forum say that you shouldn't compare your insides to somebody else's outsides. What people put on FB and how they really are are two different things so there's no point comparing yourself to them.

Write down those goals and then break them down into smaller pieces that you can accomplish one step at a time. You can do it!! :)
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Thanks Twiggle. You are an inspiration. Love your writing on SPW, you have an interesting point of view. You should be a blog writer or something heheh.

I will write them down, thanks. Facebook sucks sometimes. Because facebook has a majority of social greatness. It's good to stop comparing, I have SA. that's said enough.
 
MaliceInWickedland

MaliceInWickedland

Well-known member
Feeling a bit better today. Refreshed, per se. I submitted my resume to Barnes and Noble this morning and am awaiting their call. I have a good feeling right now so hopefully that lasts :)
 
awkwardamanda

awkwardamanda

Well-known member
twiggle said:
FB makes me feel like a loser occasionally, but then I read somebody on another forum say that you shouldn't compare your insides to somebody else's outsides. What people put on FB and how they really are are two different things so there's no point comparing yourself to them.
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Yeeaaaahhh...Kinda why I'm not on Facebook. I'm such a private person. I'd have to make a profile that's almost blank if I were to join because I hate the thought of telling the world about myself. But then I'd worry about people asking me why I don't fill in my profile. And people might think I'm a loser for not having many friends, even though that would make them more of losers. And they might think I'm a bitch for not adding random acquaintances if they request it, even though I'd appear to have more friends. Ugh, I just hate the thought of it sometimes. I've considered joining but then I always stop and think why I'd likely hate it.:confused:
 
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