I have so much anger pent up inside of me (acumulated over my life) that sometimes it scares me. I wonder what will happen if I get to the point where I can't keep it suppressed anymore. Thats scary to think about :/
I think we all have pent-up anger, especially those who don't express it properly. I have the same thing and I hope you can release it in a healthy environment.
Yes, yes you are right the first week is definitely the most difficult and the biggest breakthrough. I hope so, too. I am not worried I will find someone to talk to, I know that will come in time. What I'm worried about is my conscience telling me I didn't do well enough, I'm more socially awkward than others, and anyone else would have adjusted so much better. I guess,what I'm saying is that I'm scared of that awful feeling: unfulfillment, letting myself down, loneliness. But not the outside loneliness... the inside loneliness. I'm scared of my own critique and how bad it will hurt. Hahaha I hope that makes sense 🙂
You are already doing well. You're going to school and you've adjusted more than you probably think. Changing countries won't make your issues disappear but hopefully they will lessen when you find some good friends. I wish you the best in this endeavour.
And I saw your post about saying "no" and I think that it's great progress! Assertiveness is a skill NEEDED in life, and in my opinion, it will make you happier, make you feel more confident, more in control. And those feelings are needed, they will help you to build up your self-esteem! You need to start worrying about yourself more! 🙂 But I do understand where you are coming from: I'm EXACTLY the same. I was talked into TOO many things, including hosting a huge party at my house. Bad idea.
Thank you. It was such a small incident but I liked my insistence. My therapist wants me to say no more often and I think that's a good indication of what she's been saying. Whoa, I would never host a party at my house. I'm sorry you got talked into that!
I've had a pretty good day. I was more relaxed then usual and had a few laughs with the family. I helped my dad pick out some things for my mom for Valentine's day;She loved them. It was sweet. Also, my niece enjoyed getting chocolates and a stuffed animal. She was going around hugging everyone saying " Happy Valentine's Day" which was very cute. It's been a good day. It reminds me that I love my family. It's hard to remember sometimes. 🙂
I'm very glad you had a great Valentine's Day!
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