Post your random thoughts/feelings etc

I have had an abysmal start to this year, my anxiety was getting on top of me in terms of things that needed doing (car repairs, for which I have no clue about how to do it or to even ask someone; heating issues at home that I have to sort but not sure how) and it is my week off so I planned for a quiet week to try and tackle more my anxiety relating to my driving and my twin children who are three months old. But the aforementioned issues put paid to that and I ended up in a miserable mood, affecting my wife primarily.

However, my wife asked why consistently and as my mood disrupted our plans she continued to ask this morning. I just couldn't open up, maybe I will later but in that moment, my mouth was stuck closed. I could only mumble some vague words. And then, IDK why, I burst in tears - the first time I've cried like that in years. I'm devoid of emotion when others cry, maybe that's why I cried like that after a long time but I just feel like I'm failing as a man, as a husband to my family despite my wife saying I'm the best. I wish my anxiety didn't cripple me to the point I can't get things done to protect and look after my family.

I even thought about possibly, ending it all but I don't have the courage for that so maybe I just have to persevere for the people that rely on me.
 
I have had an abysmal start to this year, my anxiety was getting on top of me in terms of things that needed doing (car repairs, for which I have no clue about how to do it or to even ask someone; heating issues at home that I have to sort but not sure how) and it is my week off so I planned for a quiet week to try and tackle more my anxiety relating to my driving and my twin children who are three months old. But the aforementioned issues put paid to that and I ended up in a miserable mood, affecting my wife primarily.

However, my wife asked why consistently and as my mood disrupted our plans she continued to ask this morning. I just couldn't open up, maybe I will later but in that moment, my mouth was stuck closed. I could only mumble some vague words. And then, IDK why, I burst in tears - the first time I've cried like that in years. I'm devoid of emotion when others cry, maybe that's why I cried like that after a long time but I just feel like I'm failing as a man, as a husband to my family despite my wife saying I'm the best. I wish my anxiety didn't cripple me to the point I can't get things done to protect and look after my family.

I even thought about possibly, ending it all but I don't have the courage for that so maybe I just have to persevere for the people that rely on me.
Hang in there, S&S. :(

I can't imagine what a strain that must be, having social phobia while taking care of a family.
 
Still haven’t got a clue as to why my nieces like me... :confused: Probably being the exact opposite of their mother has something to do with it. :unsure: Or, maybe even a lot to do with it. :LOL:

That said, it’s quite amusing and adorable that - every time she sees me or comes up to my bedroom - the youngest of my 2 nieces, who isn’t even 2 years old yet, just repeatedly says my name, over n’ over. Then she goes all quiet if I say hello. :LOL:
 
Still haven’t got a clue as to why my nieces like me... :confused: Probably being the exact opposite of their mother has something to do with it. :unsure: Or, maybe even a lot to do with it. :LOL:

That said, it’s quite amusing and adorable that - every time she sees me or comes up to my bedroom - the youngest of my 2 nieces, who isn’t even 2 years old yet, just repeatedly says my name, over n’ over. Then she goes all quiet if I say hello. :LOL:
Haha :LOL: kids are so funny.
 
I have had an abysmal start to this year, my anxiety was getting on top of me in terms of things that needed doing (car repairs, for which I have no clue about how to do it or to even ask someone; heating issues at home that I have to sort but not sure how) and it is my week off so I planned for a quiet week to try and tackle more my anxiety relating to my driving and my twin children who are three months old. But the aforementioned issues put paid to that and I ended up in a miserable mood, affecting my wife primarily.

However, my wife asked why consistently and as my mood disrupted our plans she continued to ask this morning. I just couldn't open up, maybe I will later but in that moment, my mouth was stuck closed. I could only mumble some vague words. And then, IDK why, I burst in tears - the first time I've cried like that in years. I'm devoid of emotion when others cry, maybe that's why I cried like that after a long time but I just feel like I'm failing as a man, as a husband to my family despite my wife saying I'm the best. I wish my anxiety didn't cripple me to the point I can't get things done to protect and look after my family.

I even thought about possibly, ending it all but I don't have the courage for that so maybe I just have to persevere for the people that rely on me.
Didn't see this post earlier. It is possible that it's going to sound like the dumbest advice ever (and maybe it is), but sometimes it's all in the mind set and it helps (me) to pretend that I can do anything and that there is a solution to everything. Then you can ask yourself, ok what would I do if I actually believed that I could fix this problem. You have to considere only one problem at a time or else it's too overwhelming. It also helps to try and stay in the present as much as possible. There is no point in speculating about what shit is going to hit you in the future if you have important problems to fix in the present.

If you don't have the money to have the heater and the car fixed by a professional, I suggest you use the internet. There is a surprising amount of information on these kind of practical matters on the forums and on youtube. And as you do this, don't forget that you're super great at fixing cars if you only bother to try, and that you have all the time in the world (so try to do this when you actually have a lot of time). If you can't figure it out by yourself, and you can think of someone you could call, call them and ask for help. Don't overthink it, just do it. People are sometimes surprisingly happy to help for car problems and things like that.

And when the anxiety has been building up for a long time I find that it is sometimes useful to cry a good shot, so I wouldn't feel too bad about it. It's a way to evacuate the stress when you have too much of it stored. Once it's all out, it's easier to pull yourself together and get back on the road.

Finally if it's available for you it could be useful to seek professional support, if only to remind you, once in a while, that you can figure it out and everything is going to be ok. They could also give you some tools to sort things out and make it easier for you to find solutions to everyday issues, which would make you feel less overwhelmed.
 
Didn't see this post earlier. It is possible that it's going to sound like the dumbest advice ever (and maybe it is), but sometimes it's all in the mind set and it helps (me) to pretend that I can do anything and that there is a solution to everything. Then you can ask yourself, ok what would I do if I actually believed that I could fix this problem. You have to considere only one problem at a time or else it's too overwhelming. It also helps to try and stay in the present as much as possible. There is no point in speculating about what shit is going to hit you in the future if you have important problems to fix in the present.

If you don't have the money to have the heater and the car fixed by a professional, I suggest you use the internet. There is a surprising amount of information on these kind of practical matters on the forums and on youtube. And as you do this, don't forget that you're super great at fixing cars if you only bother to try, and that you have all the time in the world (so try to do this when you actually have a lot of time). If you can't figure it out by yourself, and you can think of someone you could call, call them and ask for help. Don't overthink it, just do it. People are sometimes surprisingly happy to help for car problems and things like that.

And when the anxiety has been building up for a long time I find that it is sometimes useful to cry a good shot, so I wouldn't feel too bad about it. It's a way to evacuate the stress when you have too much of it stored. Once it's all out, it's easier to pull yourself together and get back on the road.

Finally if it's available for you it could be useful to seek professional support, if only to remind you, once in a while, that you can figure it out and everything is going to be ok. They could also give you some tools to sort things out and make it easier for you to find solutions to everyday issues, which would make you feel less overwhelmed.
Good post!. Love it!
 
Some time ago I knew a guy who liked pushing his way of life into others. Always preaching about being a Vegan and how no one else should eat meat. On top of that he was one of these radical "save the world environmentalists ". Attended sit ins where they disrupted peoples daily routines and went to protests.
Now I have nothing against Vegans (apart from when they try to shove their way of life and choices down your throat) and I certainly am for protecting the environment.

But if you are going to preach to people and point the finger at them then you want to make sure you have your own house in order.

I could never take this guy seriously as he was a heavy smoker, drove a gas guzzling 4WD (used to go tearing up trails down at the local beach in it) and would be partial to a McDonald's chicken burger once in a while..
I guess it makes you look quite stupid if you dont practice what you preach.
 
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