How are you feeling?

[jaim38]

I feel so relieved that my final presentation is over!! Now all I have left is a final exam and I'm done!

But, having to sit in that classroom and hearing people call me names is very uncomfortable. I know who's doing the name calling but didn't look because I didn't want to cause a fight. I just pretended to act neutral, like I didn't hear it. Then, when it was time for my team's presentation, I see some people walking out. During the presentation, I heard some people chuckling.

It kinda hurt being called stupid, but I told myself that it's better to be humble and dumb than to be smart and arrogant. Humility is not something I'm willing to give up. A wise man once said, "I know nothing." I've been called stupid, dumb, crazy before, but so have other entrepreneurs before they go on and become successful. The key is to not let other people's words get to you. I'm gonna admit, I am not foolproof to other people's words - they do sting. The saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones (but words will never hurt me)" is not true for me since I'm very sensitive, and I've been hurt, but I think it's ok to mourn and feel sad before picking myself back up and moving on. After all, I'm only human, I can't pretend I'm Hercules or whatever. The important part is not whether you get hurt or not, it's whether you make an effort to pick yourself back up and continue on.

Other teams may think my team is stupid, but I'm actually very proud of my team and all our hard work. I actually enjoy working with such good people.

 

[jaim38]

No' great. Depressed as f**k. Fatigued an' aw the pish that comes wi' that.

F**kin' knackered, basically.

Woke up wi' a sore throat. Little tae nae voice - which isnae surprising since ah don't talk much anyway. Dizzy. Coughin' like a conked oot f**kin' car engine. Shite analogy, ah know.

But then, ah've got the f**kin' flu, haven't ah? That's a rhetorical question, there.

Another day feelin' absolutely f**kin' shite! *Cough* :sad:

I recommend getting some exercise to get the blood flowing, and eating healthy food. I hope you feel better soon!

 

[MollyBeGood]

Feeling thankful. -45 windchills expected here today. So glad to have groceries in the fridge, firewood to burn. Doggie snoozing peacefully in his bed beside me.

 

[Srijita52]

You and I need to find a way to chat a little easier. We are both lonely and could probably do with each other's company.

Sorry to hear, Srijita. Good luck to you.

I agree. Feel free to talk to me anytime Mikey. I'd love to talk to you. And thank you.
I'm feeling really depressed today, I basically spent the entire evening browsing the internet because I'm too depressed to concerntrate on anything and I got exams coming up. Then when I was almost getting over it, a friend of mine felt the necessity to be a psycho analyzer and explain to me why my ex threw me out of his life like some fly. Geez thank you so much!

 

[Opaline]

I feel pretty bad, honestly. I'm not going to sit around feeling sorry for myself, but I've been fighting the bad holiday feelings all day. No money, no friends, no boyfriend, no extended family. Nothing. My sister will be home from college but that's about it. I'm grateful we're all in decent health and we're not starving and all of that, but I still feel sad that Christmas feels so desolate this year. I feel like I will never have a happy life... I'll just watch everyone else have friends and family and boyfriends and I'll end up alone... like I've always been except for brief periods in my life. Boo hoo me, yeah I know. I have lots of physical energy but emotionally I feel terrible.

I'll probably delete this out of disgust later, I just couldn't bear not to tell someone... My family doesn't want to hear it and I don't blame them. Everyone's stressed and depressed all the time around here.

If I wasn't such a chicken I would hang myself. 'tis the season, right?

 

[coyote]

Classic Christmas Songs - Andy Williams - Most Wonderful Time of the Year - YouTube

 

[MikeyC]

I agree. Feel free to talk to me anytime Mikey. I'd love to talk to you. And thank you.
I'm feeling really depressed today, I basically spent the entire evening browsing the internet because I'm too depressed to concerntrate on anything and I got exams coming up. Then when I was almost getting over it, a friend of mine felt the necessity to be a psycho analyzer and explain to me why my ex threw me out of his life like some fly. Geez thank you so much!

That's awful, Srijita. I hope you don't let her get to you too much. :sad:

 

[jaim38]

Gosh, why do I feel like a bad person for what happened today? In situations like these, I almost always get hated by the rest of the class, even when I'm not the one doing the bullying. Everyone picks on "stupid" people, including the ones who are mentally challenged. I just have this urge to defend myself, but I also don't want to go into telling my whole life story. I'm not good at handling conflicts. I don't have good role models in life whom I could imitate or learn from. I feel very defensive now, for some reason. How is it my fault? I don't go around calling people stupid, ordering people to do things, spreading rumors about others. All I did was sit there and be quiet - that's not bullying!

 

[Kiwong]

Hope the depression passes Srijita, good luck with your exams.

 

[Graeme1988]

I recommend getting some exercise to get the blood flowing, and eating healthy food. I hope you feel better soon!

Cheers! Ah'll keep that in mind when ah feel ah've got the energy... and am no' clutchin' a water bottle.

Gosh, why do I feel like a bad person for what happened today? In situations like these, I almost always get hated by the rest of the class, even when I'm not the one doing the bullying. Everyone picks on "stupid" people, including the ones who are mentally challenged. I just have this urge to defend myself, but I also don't want to go into telling my whole life story. I'm not good at handling conflicts. I don't have good role models in life whom I could imitate or learn from. I feel very defensive now, for some reason. How is it my fault? I don't go around calling people stupid, ordering people to do things, spreading rumors about others. All I did was sit there and be quiet - that's not bullying!

Because ye took it, personally mibbe? Well it seems that way, Jaim. Nae offense or anythin'. Just sayin'...

Ah know, though... am the same. Not great wi' conflicts, either. Ah tend tae lose it in snap, verbal in those situations, masel'.

It's no' yer fault, though. So stop lettin' it get ye doon, darlin'. Yer quiet, so what? Nothin' wrong with that. Plus the folk doin' that tae ye - sayin' yer stupid n' that - are just tryin' tae provoke ye. Believe me, ah've been on the receivin' end of a lotta insults.

But then, am a wee, mad, mental, mouthy, quick-witted, fast-talkin' Scottish c*nt. :sarcastic: Ma advice, defend yersel'. Seriousl. By that, ah mean verbally, no' physically or anythin'. Nae grabbin' them n' headbutt or nuthin'. Granted, they'd probably be scare shitless if ye did that.

Anyway, the best way to deal with is either to ignore it - as best ye can. Or respond with a witty or nonsensical comeback. Honestly, out-wit them and they'll usually shut up. Just a suggestion, mind you. :bigsmile:

 

[Opaline]

Gah. Despite how possibly illusory a good chunk of it is, seeing lots of pictures and people tagged in statuses and all of that on Facebook really hurts my heart. I'm so isolated and I don't know how to begin to change that. The usual things come to mind - join organizations/clubs, get to know people in classes, etc. - and in theory that's perfect but in practice it's so hard and it takes a long time to make any progress.

I worked out today, cooked, cleaned, am doing homework. I do things. I don't just sit around and mope. But the bad feelings are catching up to me :sad:

I want a blanket, a movie, hot cocoa, and a dear friend :sad:

 

[Phoenixx]

I hate the fact that I still can't seem to have a good night out without coming home and thinking of all the things I wish I did/said. I mean, it was a good night out, I had fun, yet all I can focus on is what I did and didn't do instead of the fun I did have. Stupid brain. :kickingmyself:

 

[jaim38]

Because ye took it, personally mibbe? Well it seems that way, Jaim. Nae offense or anythin'. Just sayin'...

Ah know, though... am the same. Not great wi' conflicts, either. Ah tend tae lose it in snap, verbal in those situations, masel'.

It's no' yer fault, though. So stop lettin' it get ye doon, darlin'. Yer quiet, so what? Nothin' wrong with that. Plus the folk doin' that tae ye - sayin' yer stupid n' that - are just tryin' tae provoke ye. Believe me, ah've been on the receivin' end of a lotta insults.

But then, am a wee, mad, mental, mouthy, quick-witted, fast-talkin' Scottish c*nt. :sarcastic: Ma advice, defend yersel'. Seriousl. By that, ah mean verbally, no' physically or anythin'. Nae grabbin' them n' headbutt or nuthin'. Granted, they'd probably be scare shitless if ye did that.

Anyway, the best way to deal with is either to ignore it - as best ye can. Or respond with a witty or nonsensical comeback. Honestly, out-wit them and they'll usually shut up. Just a suggestion, mind you. :bigsmile:

Thanks for the response. Yeah, it makes no sense to blame myself for what happened. And I should stop taking things too personally. Just forget about the negative experiences today, because I won't see those students again since it's the end of the semester and my classes are almost over!

 

[S_Spartan]

I feel like the well has run dry. It seems that no matter how hard I work for something that very little or nothing ever comes from it. After a while you don't even feel like trying any more. It really amazes me how truly blessed some people are. They do little, or in some cases, nothing and they seem to be showered with all kinds of goodness. Or at the very least their hard work pays off. They aren't sitting in the same sorry state that I am. I truly don't even know what to work hard for anymore. No direction seems to lead anywhere.
Yes, I have food and shelter but in America that really doesn't count for much and that is just the material aspect, there is the whole single and lonely aspect that grinds away at my soul every day.
It's like now everything is a huge struggle. Even basic stuff. I'm at a point now where I can't positive think my way out.
Even when I was trying to post this message the internet went out!

 

[Srijita52]

That's awful, Srijita. I hope you don't let her get to you too much. :sad:

Hope the depression passes Srijita, good luck with your exams.

Thank you both. I'm still feeling down but I'm forcing myself to go out and do stuff, while I just want to hide in my bedroom.

 

[MikeyC]

Thank you both. I'm still feeling down but I'm forcing myself to go out and do stuff, while I just want to hide in my bedroom.

I know this feeling where all you ever want to do is hide from the world and never socialise again, but the fact you're pushing through it and getting yourself out there is great and you should be proud. What did you do?

 

[Kiwong]

Watched an interesting show on the ABC, called Dingo Wild Dog at War. It showed some interesting research about the impact the Dingo as a higher predator has in controlling cats and foxes, leading to an increase in small native mammal numbers, and also reducing grazing by Kangaroos. There was a section on Guardian Dogs and how they protect sheep flocks from Wild dogs.

 

[Srijita52]

I know this feeling where all you ever want to do is hide from the world and never socialise again, but the fact you're pushing through it and getting yourself out there is great and you should be proud. What did you do?

Thank you, my friend wanted to hangout today, so we went to another friend's house and chatted for while, then I finished some work that I've been putting off. My friend wants to hang out in the evening again, I told her to call me eventhough I'm not particularly feeling like it.
How are you today?

 

[Phoenixx]

Bored.....

 

[jaim38]

Thanks for the response. Yeah, it makes no sense to blame myself for what happened. And I should stop taking things too personally. Just forget about the negative experiences today, because I won't see those students again since it's the end of the semester and my classes are almost over!

I also want to add that I'm so tired of people telling me to give more compassion to others especially towards a bully. How can I feel compassionate when I'm hurting and feeling very threatened? Feeling compassionate is the last thing on my mind. Just like forgiveness doesn't come instantly, compassion also isn't something that I can conjure anytime.