Hang in there MikeyC! This girl is not worth ending your life over. I was in a similar situation many years ago but got over it, after 1-2 years. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Many fishes in the sea, don't give up!
How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Hang in there MikeyC! This girl is not worth ending your life over. I was in a similar situation many years ago but got over it, after 1-2 years. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Many fishes in the sea, don't give up!
MikeyC
Well-known member
Heh, this made me smile.
Years? Screw that. The fish in the sea go for better fish, not loser fish. I wish there was some magical cure that doesn't involve waiting it out.
springk
Well-known member
Yeah..We dont deserve it..but what is the reason for all this suffering?
Lou-s-Darkness
Well-known member
Feeling like SH*T...no other way to describe it...just incredibly lonely and unfulfilled.
this_portrait
Well-known member
I'm... okay, I suppose. Not really depressed or worried like I was yesterday, but I'm not feeling like I'm on top of the world, either. It's just a blah feeling.
vj288
not actually Fiona Apple
All week I've been tired and sluggish, probably due to my inactivity lately. I feel like I need something to do, or somewhere to go just get me out of the house besides work. I can come up with a million reasons why not go out too, playing into my hand of avoidance, but I don't even have to use them without anywhere to go. I'll make it a goal to find somewhere to go early next week after my weekend of work.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, the music concert went better than expected last night. Ah couldnae sleep much because ah still had songs from the gig playin' in ma head. Only ma only criticism: Ah wish the show hadn't been aw seating - ye cannae really see anything from the disabled access platform when the crowd stands up from their seats. Had the seats at floor level been taken away and it was floor standing, disabled access platform and behind tiered seating the platform. Like most rock bands do at gigs, there would've been a better view. Anyway, but ah digress...
On the downside... yesterday, ma cousin telt* me that am "weird" Ooops! Translation: Telt = Told (My cousin told me I'm "weird")
^Just though ah'd throw that in, eh? For those o' ya who dinnae (don't) huv a Scots to English dictionary* handy or yer lingustically challenged when it comes tae the Scottish lingo/dialect - that wee joke's either only funny tae me? Offensive? Or both? :idontknow: Ach, am a cheeky wee c%*#t, amn't ah? :
:
Anyway, it wasnae so much that ma cousin said that tae me or about me. It's more the fact he said it from the kitchen, while talkin' with ma mum, oldest sister & uncle. They'd heard me comin' doon the stairs. What makes it a wee bit worse is the fact ma mum repeated the remark and ma sister as per usual laughed-out-loud.
Ma response: Just a passive "Aye..." said in a dismissive tone o' voice -as if ah wasnae bothered by it in the least. This simple answer caused ma sister and cousin to both laugh-out-loud. :kickingmyself: Ah mean ah've heard it said of me before that ah was weird, it's nothin' new. Ah guess it just hurts more comin' from the mouth o' a family member. Doesnae help the ol' self-esteem any. If anythin'... it just makes me feel more self-conscious aboot maself. :sad:
On the downside... yesterday, ma cousin telt* me that am "weird" Ooops! Translation: Telt = Told (My cousin told me I'm "weird")
^Just though ah'd throw that in, eh? For those o' ya who dinnae (don't) huv a Scots to English dictionary* handy or yer lingustically challenged when it comes tae the Scottish lingo/dialect - that wee joke's either only funny tae me? Offensive? Or both? :idontknow: Ach, am a cheeky wee c%*#t, amn't ah? :
:Anyway, it wasnae so much that ma cousin said that tae me or about me. It's more the fact he said it from the kitchen, while talkin' with ma mum, oldest sister & uncle. They'd heard me comin' doon the stairs. What makes it a wee bit worse is the fact ma mum repeated the remark and ma sister as per usual laughed-out-loud.
Ma response: Just a passive "Aye..." said in a dismissive tone o' voice -as if ah wasnae bothered by it in the least. This simple answer caused ma sister and cousin to both laugh-out-loud. :kickingmyself: Ah mean ah've heard it said of me before that ah was weird, it's nothin' new. Ah guess it just hurts more comin' from the mouth o' a family member. Doesnae help the ol' self-esteem any. If anythin'... it just makes me feel more self-conscious aboot maself. :sad:
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Not at the moment, no. And with ma cerebal palsy, movin' out would probably cause more of an issue for me money wise, y'know? Cost o' livin' and what not... :idontknow:
Yer no wrong there, mate. Mean people do indeed suck!
Ach, am use to it! Ye kinda just accept that how they are, dinnae (don't) argue or speak outta turn. Ah know, bad idea not let 'em they've hurt ye in some way. But ah don't want tae actually say what ah really think because they wouldnae like it. Ah bite ma tongue alot. Well, no literally... f**kin' sore when ye do that, innnit? :sarcastic:
So, anyway, jokin' aside, ah just keep the "Aw, isn't he nice? He's awfy polite..." routine goin'. If ye want tae get really psychological aboot it? Ah use that as a defence mechinism because accordin' to ma family - and they've said this tae me many times - me yellin' and gettin' angry is so outta character, it's actually hysterically funny. To the point of actually laughin' at me when ah get mad.
Of course it's easy tae act calm and just no say anything, innit? But inside, usually, yer f**kin' rage! That ol' Scottish temper!
Aw, and ma voice doesnae really help matters. Or the way ah talk, rather... (Heavy use o' the Scottish dialect, in other words!)
^Should've gave ye the short explaination, shouldn't ah? Aw ma posts on here seem awfully wordy when readin' them back fur some weird reason?
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Comedy usually helps? A good laugh'll cheer ye up! If yer no too depressed? :idontknow:
ForWantOf
Well-known member
I don't feel well, and I don't feel very good about myself. I say hurtful things, and I don't mean them. I, legitimately, don't mean to do it. I don't realize I do it. I want nothing more than to stop doing it, but I don't know how to accomplish that. I guess I don't express myself very well because of lack of social interaction. Maybe I need to choose my words more carefully. It's frightening, though, because I don't want to offend. So I start doubting myself, and I wonder if just remaining silent is the best course of action. Doesn't help that I sometimes have trouble grasping at the word I want that's floating around in my head, which makes it even more difficult to sort out my thoughts.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Whoa! Ah can definitely relate there, believe me... Yer not alone! Though, ah think with me people tend to get offended by what ah say, mainly because sometimes they didnae (didn't) expect it from me, if that makes sense?
:idontknow: Though, lately ah've been wonder about whether or not tae stay silent. Ah know it's doesnae help, but it keep from causin' offense or startin' an argument - speakin' from ma own experience on that latter argument part. Anyway, hope ya feel better soon, ForWantOf (even if it's just a wee bit). :thumbup:
I'm going to my grandmother's tomorrow to spend the day with my mother learning how to be my g'ma's caretaker so that I can spend one day a week taking care of her. I'm super nervous. I've mentioned a million times that this is way, way out of my comfort zone. I have no medical training and little knowledge and I'm not the most caring, compassionate person around.
neardeath
Well-known member
I didn't think I was the caretaker type either, until there was a need. For me, most things seem worse when I think about them than when I do them. The pre-event anxiety is the worst. Hang in there. Grandma will be lucky to have you. :thumbup:
ForWantOf
Well-known member
I am feeling a bit better, thanks, in part, to your kind words. Your succor is much appreciated.
MikeyC
Well-known member
Maybe drill that into your mother that you're really uncomfortable doing this. Keep mentioning it. I don't know how else you can get out of it. I hope you can, though.