one comment which has affected your confidence
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lyricalliaisons
Well-known member
One that still p*sses ( <-- I hope that's not against the rules, I got rid of the "i" 
..... ) me off immensely, though it happened two years ago, is when my old therapist called me "weak". That is just wrong. I am not weak. She called me weak because I'm so sensitive & get my feelings hurt & cry so easily. Being "weak" & being sensitive are two completely different things. I know I probably do come off as weak because of it, but there's a difference between coming off that way & being that way. She didn't say that I come off as weak to others, but that I am weak. I'm tired of basically being vilified for being overly sensitive. Why is sensitivity considered a negative trait & insensitivity/cruelty/meanness considered positive ones. Why are rude, brash people considered good & people like me considered bad? It should be the other way around. Therapists are not supposed to insult their clients & I'm sure she would have gotten in trouble for that if I had told her supervisor. That's got to be illegal.
It just made me feel so horrible when she said that to me. ::
..... ) me off immensely, though it happened two years ago, is when my old therapist called me "weak". That is just wrong. I am not weak. She called me weak because I'm so sensitive & get my feelings hurt & cry so easily. Being "weak" & being sensitive are two completely different things. I know I probably do come off as weak because of it, but there's a difference between coming off that way & being that way. She didn't say that I come off as weak to others, but that I am weak. I'm tired of basically being vilified for being overly sensitive. Why is sensitivity considered a negative trait & insensitivity/cruelty/meanness considered positive ones. Why are rude, brash people considered good & people like me considered bad? It should be the other way around. Therapists are not supposed to insult their clients & I'm sure she would have gotten in trouble for that if I had told her supervisor. That's got to be illegal. It just made me feel so horrible when she said that to me. :
:
LadyWench
Well-known member
I don't know if this really counts, but when I was in 5th-6th grade, my friend Samone and her mom lived with me and my mom for a while. Samone and I were in the same class and her mom always bought us matching outfits. We looked somewhat similar and we wore our matching outfits on the same day. I remember this boy Michael said to me, "you and Samone look like twins! Except Samone is way cuter and you're fat." That tore me up and I will never forget it.
It got worse in junior high school. I wore about a size 7 in jeans at the time. Not overweight at all. Of course, tons of stupid girls in school called me fat and ugly and stuff. Typical things that mean bitches say when they have nothing better to do. But I took it to heart. I truly believed that I was fat because of them. Looking back on photos of myself from then, I now see that I wasn't fat at all. I actually looked good. I'm fat NOW, which sucks. But to this day, I will never forget what all of these horrible people have said to me. Ever since then, I've hated the way I look and I think I'll always believe that I'm a heifer.
Yeah, stupid.
It got worse in junior high school. I wore about a size 7 in jeans at the time. Not overweight at all. Of course, tons of stupid girls in school called me fat and ugly and stuff. Typical things that mean bitches say when they have nothing better to do. But I took it to heart. I truly believed that I was fat because of them. Looking back on photos of myself from then, I now see that I wasn't fat at all. I actually looked good. I'm fat NOW, which sucks. But to this day, I will never forget what all of these horrible people have said to me. Ever since then, I've hated the way I look and I think I'll always believe that I'm a heifer.
Yeah, stupid.
da_illest101
Well-known member
one girl told me once: i think you should have been a girl instead of a guy, just because i'm not macho, loud mouth or impose myself on other.
ah also some guy i was in team with for a school project, he said to another guy: aren't you a shame that your average is lower then Herby's(me) implying that i'm dumb just because i can't express myself well with ppl i'm not used to
ah also some guy i was in team with for a school project, he said to another guy: aren't you a shame that your average is lower then Herby's(me) implying that i'm dumb just because i can't express myself well with ppl i'm not used to
da_illest101
Well-known member
just some more it remember: why are your eyes always red are you high? (my eyes are red from countless hours in front of a computer or video games + my dad has red eyes also) for someone intelligent you sure speak slow, do you sell drugs ( because of the cloths i'm wearing)
lol, i used to get that red eye ques alot. Somebody always assumes i sell drugs because of how i dress and act too. im jus mysterious because i dont like alot of ppl in my business tho
206Raider
Well-known member
one time in middle school a girl wouldn't go out with me becuase she said I was too nice to her. I was like damn nice guys do finish last, then I became kind of an asshole to people in high school, now I'm nice to people who respect me and an asshole to people who are assholes to me, so I'm balanced, but I don't judge people til I know them.
evil feline space cadet
Banned
I get the drugs comments too... dunno why!!
SingleAloneForever
Active member
"You look like a rapist or a serial killer. Please go away you're scaring us."
This was from two random girls, for what reason I'm not sure, I hadn't even looked at them or did anything to them.
This was out at the pubs, and I'm fairly certain one of the last times I ever went out. I will still go out for dinner with friends to a pub, but I never actually go out and socialise in the sense of trying to meet anybody. It just hurts too much.
I think I'm destined to die, alone, bitter, twisted. I just wish the day would come soon. I hate feeling this way.
This was from two random girls, for what reason I'm not sure, I hadn't even looked at them or did anything to them.
This was out at the pubs, and I'm fairly certain one of the last times I ever went out. I will still go out for dinner with friends to a pub, but I never actually go out and socialise in the sense of trying to meet anybody. It just hurts too much.
I think I'm destined to die, alone, bitter, twisted. I just wish the day would come soon. I hate feeling this way.
TurboCarGirl
Member
"wow your right u have gained weight" -guy friend
Shift
Well-known member
I used to get that a lot too.... "Are you on drugs?" from my dad and grandma mostly.
Halleluja
Member
Positive:
I was hanging out with my friends when I gathered the courage to be honest with them, I said: 'Guys, I've lied to you. I've never had a girlfriend and I'm a virgin ( I'm 22). I absolutely have no clue when it comes to women. Go ahead and laugh.' I was expecting the worst, but one of my best friends answered: 'Dude, you're the single most awesome guy I've ever met. I'm not kidding. If you would act the same around girls like you act around us, they would be all over you.'
I was working in a supermarket at an airport when a male customer said to my female colleague: 'Hey Chiny (she's Asian), come here'. I couldn't believe what he said so I confronted him. After a 10 minute 'conversation' he left the store. His final argument was: 'I'm at least twice your age, you don't know a damn thing.' Then, this other guy said to me: 'You're a good man. Don't take shit from anybody oké? You did good.'
Negative:
When I was younger random people occasionally made negative remarks on my appearance, telling me I was ugly or a nerd. Back then I believed them. Seven years later + contact lenses, better haircut and clothes, I was asked if I wanted to be a model (I declined). It truly made me realize how superficial our society has become.
I was hanging out with my friends when I gathered the courage to be honest with them, I said: 'Guys, I've lied to you. I've never had a girlfriend and I'm a virgin ( I'm 22). I absolutely have no clue when it comes to women. Go ahead and laugh.' I was expecting the worst, but one of my best friends answered: 'Dude, you're the single most awesome guy I've ever met. I'm not kidding. If you would act the same around girls like you act around us, they would be all over you.'
I was working in a supermarket at an airport when a male customer said to my female colleague: 'Hey Chiny (she's Asian), come here'. I couldn't believe what he said so I confronted him. After a 10 minute 'conversation' he left the store. His final argument was: 'I'm at least twice your age, you don't know a damn thing.' Then, this other guy said to me: 'You're a good man. Don't take shit from anybody oké? You did good.'
Negative:
When I was younger random people occasionally made negative remarks on my appearance, telling me I was ugly or a nerd. Back then I believed them. Seven years later + contact lenses, better haircut and clothes, I was asked if I wanted to be a model (I declined). It truly made me realize how superficial our society has become.
BlueDays
1
I have the same problem! The fact is to get any good comments one has to have lots of interaction with enough people for any good behaviour/deed to be witnessed.
Hardly interacting with anyone for more than a few minutes, except my mother, makes this close to impossible.
very_shy
Well-known member
I often get this (=negative) response too from my parents, because I often look absent from the real world. Even when I listen a conversation, my minds often swim elsewhere. So I can sit or stay at the same place for the whole day, when thinking
Positive: 7 years ago (when 19) one of my father colleagues told me that I am beautiful and I should not worry to find a girlfriend. This was the only such compliment from the "outside" (so excluding my parents and my hairdresser when done).