Well, today was quite a day.
It started out with us dropping Gizmo off at the local vet to get neutered, which he was in desperate need of. He’s been humping the living crap out my arm lately and it’s about time he got those feisty little balls of his snipped. We had to leave him overnight so we won't be seeing him until tomorrow morning.
After that, we went to church like the good little Catholics we are.
...Pfft... who am I kidding? Today was the first time I went to church since a year and a half ago. Aren't I just a model Catholic?
So from there we went to get our grub on at Fuddrucker's. Funny name right? Even funnier was how this really b****y lady started arguing quite viciously with a server about the fat and nutritional content of her burger.
Seriously…? You're gonna eat at a burger place and complain about fat and calories?? What femmeballs of epic proportion you have, lady. I mean Good Lord, that's like going to an ice cream parlor to complain that everything has dairy in it. It’s a frickin burger for the love of a furry umbrella-carrying kangaroo’s sake!
What's even more amazing is that she could have easily gone with a chicken sandwich instead. If a burger is such a hassle for you then why not go for the healthier alternative of chicken? Or wait, don't tell me: you were attacked by chickens when you were younger and you're afraid you'll have nightmares for the rest of your miserable life about a band of savage AIDS-ridden chickens raping you, pecking your eyes out, and eating you alive for eating that sandwich?
Cheezus Crust man. It doesn't hurt to indulge in one of life's simple pleasures every once in a while y'know. That server should have stuck that burger up that lady's ass to replace her head. Make her s*** Sloppy Joe's for a living. At least that's what I would have done if I were in his shoes. Better yet, I just felt like turning around and b**** whipping the prude with a bladed Cat o’ Nine Tails while shouting “Pull your head out of your ridiculously skinny little ass and just eat the mother fuddrucking burger, b****!”. Damn...
Whew… Sorry for that crazy rant on burgers and evil chickens. People like that lady just fry my butt off.
Anyhow... next came the theater where we watched the new Harold and Kumar movie. I personally didn’t like it much. It had its moments, but I thought it was pretty corny and tried too hard to be funny. The lines for Breaking Dawn were absolutely ridiculous. It stretched all the way across the lobby and outside where the line continued far along the building. It was raining pretty hard but people were still waiting out there in line. As much as I dislike the Twilight saga, I tip my hat off to those fangirls for their commitment to the movie, as ridiculous as it may be :
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And so to conclude our interesting and adventurous day, we stopped by Blockbuster to pick up a few movies, which is where I came across this amusing little concoction of randomness in the
horror section of all the unsuspecting places:
Yeah... for this one you have to be baked beyond salvation to grasp even the simplest concept behind this film. The cover says it all. ‘nuff said.
And that concludes the random madness of my day.
