Is anyone scared of awkward silences?

[AsTimeBurns]

Not scared of them, no. But they are a bit awkward.

 

[JamesSmith]

I don't like awkward silences. They make me uncomfortable in most cases. Sometimes it does feel good to see some really outgoing, cocky person come near me and just shut up though. It's kind of cool to know that I have the control to make those people who hate shy people tremble in my presence.

“The shy man does have some slight revenge upon society for the torture it inflicts upon him. He is able, to a certain extent, to communicate his misery. He frightens other people as much as they frighten him. He acts like a damper upon the whole room, and the most jovial spirits become, in his presence, depressed and nervous.” -Jerome K. Jerome

 

[Tulicks]

I blame myself for those awkward silences too because I'm never the one that can break them. Eventually they get broken by someone else in the room saying something, and then everyone latches on to what was said, and the conversations start up again. I just sit there like a lump on a log while they converse back and forth with nothing to say... If I was the person who could break the silence, then I wouldn't feel blamed for causing it.

 

[Phoenixx]

I'm not sure if I'd say I'm terrified of them, but I still hate them because they make me feel so uncomfortable. Then I start blaming myself for not being able to carry a conversation properly and then not having the courage to talk any further.

 

[Iluv]

I am. I try to avoid those but you really can't completely. They follow me around.

 

[MikeyC]

As those above me have said, I hate them, too, almost to the point of talking garbage so they don't appear. Now I realise I'm probably doing more harm than good there. I always feel like they're my fault because I can't keep a conversation flowing or interesting.

 

[Dark angel]

I wouldn't say I'm scared of them but it definitely annoys me when it happens because the atmosphere of what it used to be the conversation turns very awkard. Then, my head starts to go round and round trying to find new subjects to keep the conversation going but nothing never seems too interesting or good to be used and my mind goes blank. So I basically stay quite and the other person too. I do blame myself of making everything boring and when that happens my whole body goes stiff and I do not dare to move anywhere. Is very weird but I guess is another thing some of us with SA can't avoid.

 

[hippiechild]

no, not any more... I think they're neat and can be used to inform you of the cultural background of the people you're with as well as the nature of your relationship with them.

awkward silences are a product of germ theory, western culture and Purell

 

[Lexington]

Not as much as I used to.

 

[gustavofring]

Kind of.

I hate the awkward silence in the kitchen when roommates are there, and I have 9 of them so that happens quite a lot. But it's always with certain people I dont't really have much to say to and they don't have much to say to me.

I'm sure part of it is because they know I'm a bit of a shut-in and don't have much to say. I do my best to keep it a bit jolly, but sometimes I really have no inspiration. I ask them about their studies etc.

 

[Flowers-Of-Bloom]

Yes, terrified of those long, painful silences. I try to think of things to say, but I just can't. >_<

 

[LittleKitty]

What to do during a awkward silence.

....
Person 1: want a cookie?
Person 2: Sure!
Person 1: I didn't think you would actually say yes, I was just being nice. *bites cookie*

Nah, I wouldn't do that............

To answer your question, I don't find silences awkward.

 

[bcsr]

What I do to break uneasy silence... sarcastically tell the other person they are sooooo boooorrrinngg.
Haha! But no, seriously, that's what I do.

You can let the other person do most of the talking, most of the time. Actively listen and ask open-ended questions. Don't ask questions that can be answered with yes or no.

 

[setmefree]

Yeah, I hate awkward silences. But sometimes I don't notice when silences are awkward, since I can enjoy silence as well... so then I notice people being all squirmy and trying to force conversation, while I'm perfectly comfortable. So it depends really.

Also, I have noticed I can be somewhat of a conversation killer. People try to talk to me, ask me questions about my life etc. and I manage to answer their questions, but then I never ask questions about them or their lives back. So I guess I come off as uninterested and rude, while really I'm just scared of asking since I'm afraid of saying something stupid or wrong, or I'm afraid of prying.

 

[Insanewoman389]

YES!!! I hate it, I'm always dreading it when I know I'm gonna hang out with my friend and I'm constantly trying to think of what I can talk about before she comes over. And then during the awkward silence I'm constantly trying to think of something to say which then makes me say something stupid which just makes it worse XD

 

[LifeInternal88]

This why i don't like long journeys in a car with someone I'm not used to //Awkward with no possibility of escape.

I wish our culture would change this attitude; make it normal to sit in silence.

 

[OceanMist]

It makes me terrified when I'm talking to someone and somehow there's a silence, I blame myself painfully because I immedietely think it's my responsibility to break the silence...it's horrible.

It's funny you bring this up because I just had a date where I had like 20 awkward silences.

Yes, the awkward silence is usually because of me, and that's okay because I'm shy and those happen a lot because small talk doesn't always come naturally to me. I'm not afraid of awkward silence, but I do admit there were times where I got really uncomfortable during that date when there was the awkward silence.

When it started happening at first, this girl was really weird and she would just stare at me waiting for me to say something. After it kept happening I just instinctively would look away and try to think of something to say. It wouldn't have been as bad if she hadn't of just stared at me during those moments like she was penetrating into my soul.

That was the only date where awkward silences were a large issue for me, which is good. I think that has to do with luck too, because the women I dated before that were very talkative.

I think a lot of people who are shy, a big reason why they avoid others is because of awkward silences. That is the biggest reason I avoided dating for 5 years, I didn't think I'd have anything to say. It turns out I do have stuff to say, which is good. I need to find a woman who likes me for who I am, which unfortunately has been a little difficult.