How are you feeling?

Miserum

Well-known member
Not good. My head has been killing me all day (tension headache) and my neck feels tight but doesn't hurt to move. I feel jittery and had nausea earlier. Web MD said it's possible I have meningitis, and I did get an infected bug bite last week that I already took antibiotics for and it's healing, BUT there's always that 2% chance right??? :unsure: My mind is telling me I'll probably have to go to the hospital soon if I don't feel better or feel worse tomorrow. Because meningitis. :confused:

And that ^^^^ is a sure sign that I'm completely having an anxiety attack and haven't let myself get to panic stage as my body always does this. Builds up until I break. :cry:

I think I'm nervous about tomorrow as I'm starting my new job. My thoughts haven't stopped all day -- wondering what to wear, how I'm going to talk to people, how I'm gonna progress, how am I going to be able to do workshops in the future, how I'm going to fare with future traveling, what are my coworkers going to think of me, etc. etc. :(
What's worse? Meningitis... or the first day at a new job? :p

I am confident that you'll do fine, Phoenixx.

But, in the off-chance that you aren't fine, at least you'll learn from the experience!
 

Phoenixx

Well-known member
I'm really tired today. This week has been a long week. I started my new (part-time) job, which I'm liking. I'm surprised I'm finding myself not loving it though. But then again, I just started so I'm trying to get used to the transition. I spent the first day doing nothing but paperwork - reading the handbook and policies, signing agreements, tax documents for pay, etc. etc. Yesterday I spent 75% of the day just observing as part of the training and the other 25% doing client files and being taught how to read documents. I know I signed up as an assistant, but I'm itching to just work with my hands already. I don't want to just watch and stand there awkwardly in the room, zoning out and feeling painfully bored. I want to just do things already. I'm hoping today will bring that opportunity. Admittedly I can't wait til the day is over. I feel like I need the following 3 days off just to wrap my head around everything and feel settled.
 

Miserum

Well-known member
I'm really tired today. This week has been a long week. I started my new (part-time) job, which I'm liking. I'm surprised I'm finding myself not loving it though. But then again, I just started so I'm trying to get used to the transition. I spent the first day doing nothing but paperwork - reading the handbook and policies, signing agreements, tax documents for pay, etc. etc. Yesterday I spent 75% of the day just observing as part of the training and the other 25% doing client files and being taught how to read documents. I know I signed up as an assistant, but I'm itching to just work with my hands already. I don't want to just watch and stand there awkwardly in the room, zoning out and feeling painfully bored. I want to just do things already. I'm hoping today will bring that opportunity. Admittedly I can't wait til the day is over. I feel like I need the following 3 days off just to wrap my head around everything and feel settled.
Glad to hear that it seems you're doing alright at work. Bored is better than anxious, I guess. :)
 

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Absolutely pumped to see this band again in May next year! One of the best live concerts you'll ever see, this time complete with a replica spitfire above the stage, flamethrowers and.. the Trooper Eddie on stage!!

These guys are legends and in their 5th decade!!

 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Absolutely pumped to see this band again in May next year! One of the best live concerts you'll ever see, this time complete with a replica spitfire above the stage, flamethrowers and.. the Trooper Eddie on stage!!

These guys are legends and in their 5th decade!!

Awww... you luck b@$…@*! My oldest sister wus’nae even swayed by the possibility that Run to the Hills might be the last song of the encore to try for tickets. No, as soon as I said the Legacy of the Beast UK tour’s only show in Scotland was in Aberdeen she goes: “Aberdeen?! F…k that! We’re no trailing that far, aw the way up there, for yin concert” :LOL:

Looks like a helluva show. And yer not wrong as far as one of the best concerts you’ll ever see. I mean, I’ve been lucky enough to have seen Iron Maiden 3 times, and the first time I saw them back in 2003 is still the best gig I’ve seen. Mind you that was my actual first ever concert. So... well worth having my hearing impaired for 3 days.
 

Miserum

Well-known member
I've had a recent injury which is very, very painful. Went and seen the Doc and he gave me some painkillers - Endone, which is morphine.
Jesus I'm spaced out lol
giphy.gif
 

Phoenixx

Well-known member
On the verge of a mental breakdown today. :cry: I went out to get groceries, attempted to try out online grocery pickup which was abysmal and left me in a bad mood so I straight up left without my order (that I cancelled), and then nearly had a panic attack on the way home with the increased amount of traffic. I stopped at the gas station, tried to realign myself 3 times at the pump and could NOT get it right (I've been having a problem with blurry vision this week and I don't know why), so I cried in frustration at myself and in general and just left without gas and went home. :cry: I feel so stupid.

Plus, I have to be at work in 3 hours, and it takes me roughly 45 mins to get there.

I feel like I have 50 lbs of unnecessary weight on me. I feel like I should be happy. I'm working in the field I want to be working in, living in the kind of house I've always wanted, in the environment I want to be in, but I'm just not happy. I don't think it has to do with the new job, just life in general. I'm only working part-time, but I'm coming home at 7:30pm every night. Most of the time I'm left taking care of errands, house chores, and caring for an elderly dog (my husband's) that has had so many issues this year that I'm so frustrated with I just want to put her down. My husband is rarely here because of his job, some nights he gets home later than I do, and leaves a lot earlier than I do. He's currently travelling almost 3 hours to his job. I never see him. I keep asking (read: nagging) about his work plans for winter and the near future now that we've moved. I don't want him to quit his job, I want him to work out a plan with his company (like other coworkers that live farther away) to only work on jobsites and not at their home base. That way he only works 6 - 8 months out of the year and not have to travel nearly as far. Or if he does, he gets somewhere to stay and 60% of the cost is covered. The other 4 - 6 months he could either collect unemployment or find a gig on the side to earn some extra cash. He hasn't even bothered to bring up anything and just goes with whatever they tell him to do. He's too much of a "yes" man and it really freaking bothers me. It puts pressure on me with work and house and his dog, meanwhile he just works constantly. It's really caused a lot of arguments for us this year and honestly I'm not sure how much of it I can take. :( (I grew up in an environment where my father was a workaholic. I saw first-hand how it took a toll on my mother, and how he literally put his job over his own family. He missed a lot in my life and it basically made our relationship non-existent. So yeah I have a huge problem with workaholics.)

Sorry I had to dump all this here. I'm just feeling very overwhelmed and weepy today. :cry:
 

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
On the verge of a mental breakdown today. :cry: I went out to get groceries, attempted to try out online grocery pickup which was abysmal and left me in a bad mood so I straight up left without my order (that I cancelled), and then nearly had a panic attack on the way home with the increased amount of traffic. I stopped at the gas station, tried to realign myself 3 times at the pump and could NOT get it right (I've been having a problem with blurry vision this week and I don't know why), so I cried in frustration at myself and in general and just left without gas and went home. :cry: I feel so stupid.

Plus, I have to be at work in 3 hours, and it takes me roughly 45 mins to get there.

I feel like I have 50 lbs of unnecessary weight on me. I feel like I should be happy. I'm working in the field I want to be working in, living in the kind of house I've always wanted, in the environment I want to be in, but I'm just not happy. I don't think it has to do with the new job, just life in general. I'm only working part-time, but I'm coming home at 7:30pm every night. Most of the time I'm left taking care of errands, house chores, and caring for an elderly dog (my husband's) that has had so many issues this year that I'm so frustrated with I just want to put her down. My husband is rarely here because of his job, some nights he gets home later than I do, and leaves a lot earlier than I do. He's currently travelling almost 3 hours to his job. I never see him. I keep asking (read: nagging) about his work plans for winter and the near future now that we've moved. I don't want him to quit his job, I want him to work out a plan with his company (like other coworkers that live farther away) to only work on jobsites and not at their home base. That way he only works 6 - 8 months out of the year and not have to travel nearly as far. Or if he does, he gets somewhere to stay and 60% of the cost is covered. The other 4 - 6 months he could either collect unemployment or find a gig on the side to earn some extra cash. He hasn't even bothered to bring up anything and just goes with whatever they tell him to do. He's too much of a "yes" man and it really freaking bothers me. It puts pressure on me with work and house and his dog, meanwhile he just works constantly. It's really caused a lot of arguments for us this year and honestly I'm not sure how much of it I can take. :( (I grew up in an environment where my father was a workaholic. I saw first-hand how it took a toll on my mother, and how he literally put his job over his own family. He missed a lot in my life and it basically made our relationship non-existent. So yeah I have a huge problem with workaholics.)

Sorry I had to dump all this here. I'm just feeling very overwhelmed and weepy today. :cry:
This is the place to vent, so no need to apologize. *hug*
 

SilentAndShy

Well-known member
I feel flustered after delivering a presentation on a subject I'm known in the work office (this only deepening my sense of work fraud complex) and I felt dreadful during delivering it and after it now I'm sat in my secluded office taking stock of everything.

I had an hour maximum, and I'd rehearsed it yesterday for 30mins and thought this morning I'd take more of my time. I wanted to make sure people attending were leaving the room knowing so much more.

Putting aside my lateness, and not having my cup of coffee, I had this feeling of giving out a cluelessness on what I was talking about. I was going through things quickly, stuttering at times, and I'd planned a few 'gags' to help relax me at the start which I didn't do and not helpful were other people trying to add things to my presentation during delivery. Not necessarily in a helpful way but in a "I know some thing about Twitter so I'm going to mention it to make myself look good". I prefer doing 1 on 1 sessions and also doing it with a group of people, the majority of whom I have a polite relationship but not overly close, didn't help. I could see one person clearly not bothered.

So yes, when people say how good I am, deep down I will continue to say, no, I'm really not that good compared to my contemporaries who are managing, leading and organising and I doubt myself doing a basic task at times due to my anxiety and lack of assertiveness.
 

Miserum

Well-known member
I feel flustered after delivering a presentation on a subject I'm known in the work office (this only deepening my sense of work fraud complex) and I felt dreadful during delivering it and after it now I'm sat in my secluded office taking stock of everything.

I had an hour maximum, and I'd rehearsed it yesterday for 30mins and thought this morning I'd take more of my time. I wanted to make sure people attending were leaving the room knowing so much more.

Putting aside my lateness, and not having my cup of coffee, I had this feeling of giving out a cluelessness on what I was talking about. I was going through things quickly, stuttering at times, and I'd planned a few 'gags' to help relax me at the start which I didn't do and not helpful were other people trying to add things to my presentation during delivery. Not necessarily in a helpful way but in a "I know some thing about Twitter so I'm going to mention it to make myself look good". I prefer doing 1 on 1 sessions and also doing it with a group of people, the majority of whom I have a polite relationship but not overly close, didn't help. I could see one person clearly not bothered.

So yes, when people say how good I am, deep down I will continue to say, no, I'm really not that good compared to my contemporaries who are managing, leading and organising and I doubt myself doing a basic task at times due to my anxiety and lack of assertiveness.
For me, half an hour is not nearly enough time to get a presentation right. Usually I'll be practicing days in advance, and prepare for any questions or discussion that may pop up.
 
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