How are you feeling?

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
She's only 3 yrs old. Isn't that a tad too early to have a phone? :giggle:

Aye, ah know. But if ah point that out, ma older sister will just respond with:
:veryangry: ”Eh?! Whit d’ye mean?! Why?! Whit ur ye saying?! Aw, f*ck off! F*ck tha f*ckin’ lotta yous! F*ck off!”

Cuz she’s that used to being telt how she’s always right, she doesnae take criticism well. Try to reason with her and ya cun forget it, it’s no happening.

Plus, my niece is already getting accustomed to get her way as well. And her mother is spending well over a hundred grand on clothes for her; just stuff bought at the local supermarket. :eek: The oldest sister wus’nae too impressed when told that. Neither wus ah like, but kept quiet for... eh, diplomatic reasons. After what happened last time when I questioned her inability to conduct herself like a grownup whilst arguing, instead of roaring n’ shouting and making a scene.

Aye, my niece might only 3 yrs old. But her mother speak to her like she’s already 15, swears at her. :eek:mg: Oh, and the wee yin talks back. Piss her off and she’ll soon being telling ye she’s angry, and why. She doesn’t do as she told, unless it’s me telling her. But then I’m not bloody shouting or snapping at the wee lassie.

She’s just like her mother, though, constantly asking ya questions then asking why once you’ve already answered. Believe me, I dread to imagine how she’ll like in 10 years time. Her mother’s in for a shock anyway...
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Yay! I’ve got the house to myself for a few hours, while my mother and oldest sister help the middle child in flitting her stuff to her new house.
happy-dancing.gif
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Seems I can't do anything right. I was in the middle of microwaving the ready meal, heating each container separately as I'd been shown yesterday evening. Well, all of a sudden, my mother return unexpectedly early from help my older sister flitting to her new house.

And my mother response to me saying: "Aw, hiya! Am just getting ma dinner" is...
"Yer daein that wrong - yer supposed to put both containers in and microwave them together" :confused: :idontknow: :kickingmyself:​

Maybe she's right, maybe I am useless? :sad:
 

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Im so down at the moment. Im thinking of ending it all again. Last night after work (12:30am) I went and parked down on the beachfront, the wind was blowing a gale.. I sat in the darkness trying to work out why I shouldn't opt out. I struggled to find a reason why. I sat there listening to the wind howl over my car, rocking it..I watched the white crashing crests of the waves roll in on the dark sea.
There was another car with a sole occupant parked a bit further up from me and I wondered if they where trying to find a reason to live too.
One of the worst feelings for me is knowing that if I opted out, no one would care. I doubt anyone would even notice.
 
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Im so down at the moment. Im thinking of ending it all again. Last night after work (12:30am) I went and parked down on the beachfront, the wind was blowing a gale.. I sat in the darkness trying to work out why I shouldn't opt out. I struggled to find a reason why. I sat there listening to the wind howl over my car, rocking it..I watched the white crashing crests of the waves roll in on the dark sea.
There was another car with a sole occupant parked a bit further up from me and I wondered if they where trying to find a reason to live too.
One of the worst feelings for me is knowing that if I opted out, no one would care. I doubt anyone would even notice.
Pug, I know that I don't know you personally or the struggles you have faced, but please don't do anything drastic. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem -- I know it doesn't feel temporary because it's been going on for so long, but it is. In life you will experience happiness followed by waves of despair, but the sun will shine again. I care about you and I have always enjoyed speaking with you on here. Since we live in different countries I don't know what your resources are, but I encourage you to check them out before ending your life. Just please, take care of yourself *hug*.
 
I ain't quite that bad (^) at present, but i've got "the boredom blues". Pretty much nothing has stimulated me today. Same for yesterday, where i went to bed at 6pm, & arose at midday. The only thing that seems to help is drinking alcohol. :sad:

Listening to Billy Joel songs on youtube. Is helping. Should try find a best of playlist or video, or make my own.
 
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FountainandFairfax

in a VAN down by the RIVER
Im so down at the moment. Im thinking of ending it all again. Last night after work (12:30am) I went and parked down on the beachfront, the wind was blowing a gale.. I sat in the darkness trying to work out why I shouldn't opt out. I struggled to find a reason why. I sat there listening to the wind howl over my car, rocking it..I watched the white crashing crests of the waves roll in on the dark sea.
There was another car with a sole occupant parked a bit further up from me and I wondered if they where trying to find a reason to live too.
One of the worst feelings for me is knowing that if I opted out, no one would care. I doubt anyone would even notice.

I hope you were able to ride that wave back in, Pug. Though we all face them alone, you're not a sole occupant when it comes to those kinds of currents.
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Got this urge to do stuff, yet lacking the energy to physically be productive. Did feck all yesterday. Today, it’s back to sleep in until midday. Back to my usual routine in a way.

Other than that... :idontknow: Is it even worth channeling my time and energy into being creative? :question: Ma life still feels as stuck in a rut as it wus last year. But then I do spend much of my time doing things for others. Too much time in fact...
 
Today I went to buy lunch at the supermarket, when I was about to checkout, I greeted the cashier with 'Good evening', it was freaking noon FFS!!! I felt racist because she was of african descent.

PS : Made it to Expert User :cool:
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Im so down at the moment. Im thinking of ending it all again. Last night after work (12:30am) I went and parked down on the beachfront, the wind was blowing a gale.. I sat in the darkness trying to work out why I shouldn't opt out. I struggled to find a reason why. I sat there listening to the wind howl over my car, rocking it..I watched the white crashing crests of the waves roll in on the dark sea.
There was another car with a sole occupant parked a bit further up from me and I wondered if they where trying to find a reason to live too.
One of the worst feelings for me is knowing that if I opted out, no one would care. I doubt anyone would even notice.

:sad: Reading this post makes me sad. As I'm reading this post in wake of hearing that one of my favourite musicians took his own life 2 days ago. ::(:

Please stay strong, Pug. :thumbup:
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
I wish the responsibility for my mother’s well-being didnae aw fall onto my shoulders, every time. :sad: I’m so fed-up with listening to complaints n’ huvin any advice I give instantly disregarded. :kickingmyself:

Guess I’m just supposed to miserable, and just sit and watch as my mother slowly kills herself. Cuz that’s exactly what she doing... She doesn’t seem to care either. :crying: Wish I had a better life.
 
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