I'm so tired of this shit. All I am to my family is a gopher, a forty-one year old errand boy. It must be nice to have one so titanically overqualified for the job.
So far, 2018 has not exactly been my dream year, but with so much of it left, I hope that things will turn around for me. I have been so anxious as of late - more than I have been in a while.
I started writing my thoughts and feelings in a journal, but I have also started recording my thoughts and feelings, too. I just record myself talking; no holds barred, anything I need to say - a free stream of consciousness.
It has totally put me at peace. I have found that there is a lot of power in saying things aloud - like, releasing it into the universe.
Don't know if I can endure much more of my current situation. :sad: The constant tension is unbearable. Ah dare not even ask how anyone's feeling, cuz that'll kick off an argument. I'm desperate for things to change at this point. Otherwise... I dread to think what I'll do if they don't. :crying:
Don't know if I can endure much more of my current situation. :sad: The constant tension is unbearable. Ah dare not even ask how anyone's feeling, cuz that'll kick off an argument. I'm desperate for things to change at this point. Otherwise... I dread to think what I'll do if they don't. :crying:
How's the housing application / move coming along Graeme?
How's the housing application / move coming along Graeme?
Badly. In that, I had to apply again due to my original application being lost in post. :thumbdown: But I got a new one sent out to me before Christmas, which I completely over that period, and sent off once post office reopened for New Year. And... I'm 20th on waiting list. Opted to stay in ma boring wee infamous hometown for the time being. :idontknow:
But, due to my disability I'm still waiting on the medical form being posted out to me. Though, I did make refer to my disability in my application, just to make the housing department aware of it.
Anyway, there's a bungalow not far from where I live, just round the corner on the next street. And there's 2 houses near the centre of town that I might be eligible for. Both of which are just a few yards away from my local tattoo parlour and one of 4 local pubs. 🤭
Knackered. Haven't had a proper sleep. I'm not eating right, by which I mean skipping meals. I'm blocked up with the flu. :sad:
Other than that, it's the usual family drama.
My youngest niece had to be taken to the local hospital yesterday - I hope she's going to be okay. :praying:
Tired, I've been up since the wee hours these past few days because I can't sleep. Mainly due being unable to stop this surge of creativity ideas inside my head, and y'know... Being stressed
I'm also pissed off that, despite the heavy snow overnight here, my mother still insisted that I get up early for my podiatrist appointment this morning "...just in case". :oh: Like I'm going risk going outside when the pavements are gleaming with ice for the past 2 days. Aye, sure... :no: :thumbdown:
Ah hate how despite being the more "sensible" member of my immediate family, they constantly contradict and undermine me for thinking things through before taking action. :idontknow:
Not so great, but then that's pretty much life. :sad:
Every time any one o' us does summit wrong, the middle sibling flips her lid. And my mother seriously want us to get along? :omg: I rather go through my knee realignment surgery, but have both my knee caps broken.Cuz that how ye react when somebuddy makes a mistake, says sorry for it and is genuinely apologetic - f*ckin' yell at them. If every ah need a reason to emigrate to Canada...
Jokes aside, I hate this waiting it out period, ah should've got my name doon for a place of my own as soon I was back walking after my sugery - April 2016. But hey, some tracksuit wearing, strung oot, junkie is more likely to be re-housed afore me. :thumbdown:
i don't know why hardly anyone comes online at this time. i feel really bored and i feel lowly to say it even though if anyone else said it i wouldn't think that way of them y'know?
I go to this website when I'm feeling bored or sad. I think it's pretty funny ---> www.introvertdoodles.com
Here's hoping at least. Though, I've not been sleep much and have completely lost track of what day it is.
But that's what stress does to ye... :sad: :alone:
Anyway, hope you have a nice weekend as well, jinxed. :thumbup:
Yeah. That's when life pretty much went downhill for me and my mother. :sad: And the rest of my immediate family, w8th except of my nieces who are too young to full comprehend why we're all arguing.
Things still haven't got back to how they were - I don't even know if they will. :idontknow:
I haven't felt this low, unmotivated and just... dour in years. Yet, ironically, if I could bring myself to focus on making music it would probably help me greatly. :🙁:
Things are Ok at present, acheiving at work, did some cleaning and landscaping of my courtyards, which seems to have appeased the nrighbours. Been enjoying my time in the field at work, learning heaps. My attitude is more upbeat.
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