The Republic of Ireland is not part of the UK then?
No, the Republic of Ireland isn't part of the UK. Just Northern Ireland is part of the UK. I know, it's confusing, since I also tend to think of Ireland as whole country. Forgetting about the north/south divide of the country.
I didn't know that, that is messed up of your dads.
Yeah, it is. I think I was most affected by that, being the youngest and only son. Not having that parent I was supposed to be like, model myself after. Being told to be the man of the house but never being taught how, or given the chance to. And I look just like my dad as well.
Oh. Your family says racist things to you then?
They used to, but not anymore. Just some ill-judged jokes about my appearance, like. Nothing derogatory as far slurs go, still pretty cruel, though. There's only so often you can hear the
"You look just..." joke, with the punchline comparing you to a Middle Eastern terrorist stereotype, and genuinely laugh at. Before it starts remind you of the bullies from yer school days. Plus, I could never think of a funnier comeback.
That's what my sister and I thought. Still I felt empathy for the lad, it's no easy going up to and speaking to total strangers.
You didn't want your dad's side of the family to talk bad about you?
Well, I didn't want them to think I was doing to spite my father. Since my dad and I never got a long, and I never truly knew him, compared my other half-siblings on his side of the family. Mainly because my mum and sisters never had a good word to say about him while I was growing up, given how abusive he was towards our mum. Though, thankful that was long before I came into the world.
And when he did come back into my life, my mum and sisters just expected me to forget the story they'd told about him. And my mum's relationship advice to me, which was obviously heavily influenced by her past relationships. Particularly with my dad, and the relationship previous to that, my older half-sister's dad.
Oh okay. So you only embrace your Scottish side right?
Uh-huh! Well, it was the only culture I grew up around. So, haven't known anything. Though, racism made me more aware of the other side of my racial identity. I think I'd have embraced my African side more equally if I'd had a better relationship with my dad.
So you were the only biracial family where you lived at the time
No, there's an Asian family who own the Chinese takeaway, who are bi-racial. They been living in the town long before I was born. The son who works there has a strong Scottish accent. But still rare for the town where I live.
And, in recent years, a couple families of Indian and Turkish background have settled in my area and taken over some local shops and food takeaways that were looking for new ownership.
Just know that you are meaningful even if your family gives of that impression that you are worthless.
I know. Just difficult to realise that when I feel like such a burden at times. :sad:
Cool. Where did you shorten my response?
Oh, just the few lines where it was just you responding to something I'd explained, and I didn't feel there was more to be said, really. So, just left those out, and shortened it to included the questions you were asking me.
mg:
