How are you feeling?

J

jaim38

Well-known member
Feeling kind of tired today. Just had a horrible nightmare. I dreamt that my online class suddenly turned into an offline class and I got really mad. I automatically blamed a former classmate for this (though I highly doubt he has anything to do with this). I'm not ready to take offline classes especially given what happened in the past. Plus I need to work on my verbal and social skills before I make such a big leap.

For some reason I'm getting the pressure to be in a relationship, but let me say this: I am not ready or prepared to be in one. I am still immature, naive, and have lots to learn. If I get romantically involved now, I will get hurt. And I am indifferent to romantic relationships. I don't care if I end up single. For now, I'll stick to daydreams, which I don't think is a bad thing at all.
 
planemo

planemo

Well-known member
i feel rather down right now. it's at times like these i wish i was 'normal' and had people around me who fill my time with joy and acceptance, instead of wondering what could be if only i were a different and better person. i guess even for someone as used to isolation as i am, eventually it gets to you. :sad:
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
planemo said:
i feel rather down right now. it's at times like these i wish i was 'normal' and had people around me who fill my time with joy and acceptance, instead of wondering what could be if only i were a different and better person. i guess even for someone as used to isolation as i am, eventually it gets to you. :sad:
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Yeah, I can definitely relate to what yer sayin', planemo. I'm exactly the same. :sad:
 
MikeyC

MikeyC

Well-known member
Nathália said:
I met a few people last month and started talking to them and not one of them are talking to me again. I thought that the conversations went well. I talk to people and it seems like we hit it off, but it never lasts. They all were guys I don't know if that matters, many girls here make me feel like a guy anyways like I'm not feminine enough. I can just feel myself slipping back into depression which I don't think I can allow because I damage myself when I'm very depressed and it has a long term effect on me.
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I'm sorry. Maybe they will get in touch with you again. Or, if you like, maybe you can try to initiate conversation again and see what happens. If they still don't talk to you, it's better to know it and move on than to sit there and wonder. I'm sorry you're slipping back into depression again, and hopefully they will get back in contact again.

JuiceB said:
I did have an experience earlier this week that actually made me feel really good. I walked into a restuarant where this teenage girl was at the register talking to all sorts of people. She had to be the happiest person I've seen in some time and it was infectious. She asked me why I was frowning and I told her I wasn't. She asked me to show her my smile. With just her bright cheery attitude she force me to smile for her own the spot. And it came out! I hadn't smiled that naturally in a long time.

I wonder where was it hiding all those years?

Go figure. :idontknow:
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This is great! A positive person can unlock the happiness in you more than you know. I recall once I was in a hardware store, of all places, and I got served by this girl who was basically jumping out of her skin due to happiness and excitement. She gave me massive smiles and two thumbs up when I left, and she was doing it to every customer. It was fantastic.

I would love to hear of your smiles coming out more often, JuiceB. :)
 
Srijita52

Srijita52

Well-known member
planemo said:
i feel rather down right now. it's at times like these i wish i was 'normal' and had people around me who fill my time with joy and acceptance, instead of wondering what could be if only i were a different and better person. i guess even for someone as used to isolation as i am, eventually it gets to you. :sad:
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I'm sorry planemo. You are a great person, I know the feeling though. Stay strong.
 
Kiwong

Kiwong

Well-known member
I seem to be thoroughly addicted to caffiene, but whenever I stop taking it my thoughts are less intense and I feel lighter in my body, and the edge is taken off my anxiety.
 
Subpop

Subpop

Well-known member
Enjoying the feeling of being physically tired from some fun exercise. I met my brother today and went for a 20km ride on a mixture of singletrack, old railway reserve and the road. Both of us were really pushing each other heading back. He is 10 years older than me but very very fit and he was pushing me the whole way. Had lunch afterwards at a cafe with brother and niece. Then I drove to my sisters to see her, my brother in law and my other niece. I then went for a solo 45 minute ride on a trail not far from her house. Somedays I get the urge to be very active. All up, 240kms driving and 30km's riding.
 
Subpop

Subpop

Well-known member
Kiwong said:
I seem to be thoroughly addicted to caffiene, but whenever I stop taking it my thoughts are less intense and I feel lighter in my body, and the edge is taken off my anxiety.
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I switched to de-caf coffee some time ago. I never have freshly ground coffee as it contains way too much caffiene and I have confirmed through experience that it makes my anxiety worse. I will make a cup of reasonable decent instant coffee in the morning then de-caf from then on.
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Numb. Self-loathing. Apathetic. Far from happiness.

But ah just huv tae grin and bare it, ah guess. Keep aw ma emotions, resentments, angry and bitterness internal. :sad:

So naive, so stupid! The fact ah let people walk all over me and tell me what tae do aw the time. Yet never question, or dare disobey oot o' fear. Just get on wi' it! It's pathetic, really. But if ah say anything the reaction is usually this: :sarcastic:
 
Srijita52

Srijita52

Well-known member
Graeme1988 said:
Numb. Self-loathing. Apathetic. Far from happiness.

But ah just huv tae grin and bare it, ah guess. Keep aw ma emotions, resentments, angry and bitterness internal. :sad:

So naive, so stupid! The fact ah let people walk all over me and tell me what tae do aw the time. Yet never question, or dare disobey oot o' fear. Just get on wi' it! It's pathetic, really. But if ah say anything the reaction is usually this: :sarcastic:
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I'm sorry Graeme.
planemo said:
thanks for the compliment, i wish i could i had the ability to believe it though. you too, keep strong.
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You're welcome, what I said was true though.
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Opaline said:
I feel despairing but too weary to try do anything about it - if anything would even help. I honestly feel like my existence should not be. I can't seem to truly believe in my own worth and have confidence, and I don't know WHY. WHY?????
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Oh, dae ah know that feelin'! Yer not alone there, darlin'. Ah've been feelin' exactly the same way, lately. :sad:
 
JuiceB

JuiceB

Well-known member
^Kia didn't you write some kind of research paper not long ago? I don't think dumb people can do that and if they could it would only be a couple of sentences.
 
planemo

planemo

Well-known member
Srijita52 said:
You're welcome, what I said was true though.
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thanks again.:)

.....

i'm still feeling really down - what's new? it's like me against the world, and i have no one i can trust or rely on to be on my side. everyone is a potential enemy, and i'm merely running away from an oncoming army of danger.

it just seems like everything in my life is a battle - a battle i can't win. there are so many things to fix, and yet no way to fix them. sometimes i just wanna give up, give in and say i'm tired of fighting. tired of fighting forces i can't control or get the better of.
 
Subpop

Subpop

Well-known member
Cannot sleep. I am tired but I have to catch a taxi to the airport at 3am and I am paranoid about sleeping through my alarm, missing the taxi and missing my flight.
 
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