i'm happy because i made my mom happy. 🙂 she's going on holiday by herself, today she went and i gave her a movie called ''eat pray love'' so she can see a nice movie about a woman going traveling on her own , a great adventure 😀
& I was watching a real funny movie with my brother. 😀
I sent an email of forgiveness to my father, and was finally able to look back on my childhood and appreciate the small moments we had together. (This is what happens when you don't eat to prevent negative emotions haha 😀 )
I went on a run this morning! 🙂
Getting back to high-raw and it has made all the difference in the world in how I feel!
I'm going to try once again to go to school tomorrow (I have school every 2 days and missed my first day)
Doing some weight lifting.
I did a little bit of homework yesterday which sadly, I am proud of, because I haven't done homework in like... years. (thanks vj)
Today was a pretty good day. I skipped school (which makes me kinda feel guilty, but it was worth it). So first I went to McDonalds to eat, alone of course. That was a total disaster. The clerk didn't hear my order ... I said "two coca-colas" and he understood "two french fries". That's what my voice does ... Then when he was giving me the change, one coin fell on the floor and I had to run after it. The horror! ... oh, you must be wondering why I was ordering "two coca-colas" .. because I was ashamed of eating by myself. I usually don't care, but the day started pretty bad and when I walked into McDonalds I had the feeling that the clerks were watching me like I'm some kind of a creep, so I had to prove them I'm not and that somebody actually likes me ... that's why 2 sodas (one for me and one for "somebody that actually likes me). So, I know this doesn't sound like a "thing that made me happy today" ... well it didn't, but I didn't care much about it. THAT is what made me happy. Normally, I would think about this all day, analyzing every second of it. But now I didn't. I went on ... I even went shopping later, felling very self-confident. And then, the highlight of the month .. I went to the library to study! I go to the library quite often, but not to this one ... This one (called NUK), has a very complicated way to use the "reading room", so I was very afraid of going there for the first time. But today I went ... The first time I tried I didn't make it. I f***ed it up, because I didn't "check myself in" or sth, I don't know, so I ran out as soon as possible. But I came back! Normally I wouldn't, normally I would just run home, but now I came back, figured out the system and actually stayed there for 4 hours! Once my pen fell down and someone picked it up and asked it if it was mine ... and I said it wasn't, because it was easier to say "No" than "Yes, thank you". So I said no and my favorite pen is now gone. But I don't care. Normally, I would, but today I don't. Hurray for me!
But I know it won't last. I've had days like this and they've all passed. So will this one ... Tomorrow I'll just wake up, depressed as always, forgetting the good things and only remembering the bad. But today, that doesn't matter. Today was a GREAT day. 🙂
I beat Stoke 4-1 with Everton on Fifa with some amazing goals XD
I highly enjoyed that.
Talking with my friend on the phone was quite cool aswell.
Oh and finding out I have tomorrow and Friday off from school 😀
I have an aunt that i do not know very well, but we have started writing each other since my dear aunt died... anyway, i just received a letter today from her and it made me cry. She misses her sister(my dear aunt) so badly, and she is ill, and she misses her husband(my uncle died years ago) and she is so sad and not looking forward to Christmas. I live far away from her so i cannot see her in person but i went online and found a florist in her area and she will be getting a beautiful bouquet of festive flowers tomorrow and it makes me happy thinking of the look on her face never in a million years expecting anything from anyone.. yay!😀
I got a kitten last week and it is lovely to come home from my inevitably brutal day at work and have someone so happy to see me. She jumps around all excited like a dog would and I love it.
Today I went to the dentist to have a cracked tooth looked at. I am uninsured, but went to a place where they did an x-ray and then looked at it for me free of charge. The dentist told me not to worry because it was just cracked in the enamel and not the inner part of the tooth. So it made me happy that I wasn't going to lose the tooth (it's one of the front upper ones) and didn't need any major work done on it.
Today was a pretty good day. I skipped school (which makes me kinda feel guilty, but it was worth it). So first I went to McDonalds to eat, alone of course. That was a total disaster. The clerk didn't hear my order ... I said "two coca-colas" and he understood "two french fries". That's what my voice does ... Then when he was giving me the change, one coin fell on the floor and I had to run after it. The horror! ... oh, you must be wondering why I was ordering "two coca-colas" .. because I was ashamed of eating by myself. I usually don't care, but the day started pretty bad and when I walked into McDonalds I had the feeling that the clerks were watching me like I'm some kind of a creep, so I had to prove them I'm not and that somebody actually likes me ... that's why 2 sodas (one for me and one for "somebody that actually likes me). So, I know this doesn't sound like a "thing that made me happy today" ... well it didn't, but I didn't care much about it. THAT is what made me happy. Normally, I would think about this all day, analyzing every second of it. But now I didn't. I went on ... I even went shopping later, felling very self-confident. And then, the highlight of the month .. I went to the library to study! I go to the library quite often, but not to this one ... This one (called NUK), has a very complicated way to use the "reading room", so I was very afraid of going there for the first time. But today I went ... The first time I tried I didn't make it. I f***ed it up, because I didn't "check myself in" or sth, I don't know, so I ran out as soon as possible. But I came back! Normally I wouldn't, normally I would just run home, but now I came back, figured out the system and actually stayed there for 4 hours! Once my pen fell down and someone picked it up and asked it if it was mine ... and I said it wasn't, because it was easier to say "No" than "Yes, thank you". So I said no and my favorite pen is now gone. But I don't care. Normally, I would, but today I don't. Hurray for me!
But I know it won't last. I've had days like this and they've all passed. So will this one ... Tomorrow I'll just wake up, depressed as always, forgetting the good things and only remembering the bad. But today, that doesn't matter. Today was a GREAT day. 🙂
Analyzing every second of it is called "rumination", and is a standard feature. Things appear in a worse light each time you ruminate. So this sets up a vicious circle. This time you did not ruminate, and things went better than expected at the library.
Yesterday I gave my daddy his birthday present from me and he loved it 😀 I honestly get more excited about buying presents for people than I do about getting presents from people haha
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