My first time sex next week
- Thread starter bony666
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LazyHermitCrab
Well-known member
After having sex plan to.. have icecream and watch a movie together? so you can have a chat of some kind afterwards. don't worry about it being perfect enjoy the experiance and let go it helps anxiety
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Indeed it is, studies show that the longer you go without achieving an orgasm in some way either by sex or other means the less your body needs and will be able to achieve it. So men meet Miss Hand and ladies....finger exercises. I'm just saying.
hey guys , thanks for your answers.
Well, did I have sex ? almost. Was it good ? almost. Am I going to carry on ? No. After a few "deep Flirting" in his bed; and as I don't know him for that long; I have been totally freaked out about STI risks. i realized I wasn't totally conscious about certain risks, and am going to ask my partner for HIV/STI screening before we carry on.
I am totally terrified as things have been going too fast. The guy didn't want to wait. Besides I think I have put myself at risk because we practiced some stuff during preliminary ( which i don't mention, I know this website is not for sex stuff) and am totally freaked out: am going to medical center tomrw for screening
Gosh, every time I think my life will get better; there's a new obstacle to my happiness !!! damn it ;((
Well, did I have sex ? almost. Was it good ? almost. Am I going to carry on ? No. After a few "deep Flirting" in his bed; and as I don't know him for that long; I have been totally freaked out about STI risks. i realized I wasn't totally conscious about certain risks, and am going to ask my partner for HIV/STI screening before we carry on.
I am totally terrified as things have been going too fast. The guy didn't want to wait. Besides I think I have put myself at risk because we practiced some stuff during preliminary ( which i don't mention, I know this website is not for sex stuff) and am totally freaked out: am going to medical center tomrw for screening
Gosh, every time I think my life will get better; there's a new obstacle to my happiness !!! damn it ;((
lyricalliaisons
Well-known member
I thought this when I first read your OpI think you made the right choice.
I completely agree
WorldEndsWithMe
Well-known member
Sorry to hear it didn't work out for you...
Hopefully you'll find someone who is truly understanding and caring next time, not someone who is just pretending to be for their own hidden agenda. There are lots of nice people out there, just takes some time to find them =)
Hopefully you'll find someone who is truly understanding and caring next time, not someone who is just pretending to be for their own hidden agenda. There are lots of nice people out there, just takes some time to find them =)
Whether you do it or not, take a certain attitude. I hate to say it, but women are often unbelievably in denial about men. And that's one reason why we get hurt and abused. After knowing him for such a short time, he could be anything. Even after years of marriage people find out their partner was living double life.
So maybe this guy is a good person and loves you. Maybe he's just interested in sex. Like Serafina said, you can't know. Waiting helps a bit, but still. The risk is always there.
So, be selfish because that's what guys do. Enjoy your time. Don't expect it to be perfect. If it isn't as great as you wished? You have lost nothing. Our culture is sexist and thinks that virginity of a woman is some ****ing treasure chest that a man robs. Ignore that. It's all about how you feel.
Don't take it too seriously. Even if it ends up being a miserable experience, you will get lots of other chances. Sex is just carnal pleasure. If you take care of safety, it's like eating a cake. You shouldn't analyze cake eating too much, right?
thanks dear, that's really helpful in those times of doubt
I am defintely not taking it seriously, but I don't want to take anymore risks ever. I will wait until the end of our STI screenings and see whether I want to pursue this relationships with him or not.
W/o making stereotypes, and without being direspectful, I think guys are all the same, and it will certainly not be that different if I wait AGggain for someone else to come: the new guy would also want sex asap, and I wouldn't trust him anyway. On the other hand, if my current partner doesn't even accept screening, then it means he is a total A**H**le, and I would just leave him w/o any regrets.
iamthenra
Well-known member
Stereotype? I think you just did... We are not all the same... I've never been with anyone for 41 years... I think just being with a woman and actually being in love would be more than AWESOME! Sex, yeah it would be great too, but it isn't a deal breaker....
hey sorry that's not what I meant, I should have added 'but not all men are like that...the thing is my love life has been so desastrous. No friendship is already a hell, but I'd everyine needs love.. I have been so disappointed by what happened; they guy was actually not the right one, and I am so worried about STI; and what kills me is that life is sooo crual with SP sufferers, it's like everytime we get a very short times of happiness, then we end up suffering even more than before? ! seeing my brothers enjoying their girlfriend and friends is simply torture for me. My family is wondering about me being lonely, ans I am often blamed & criticized ! The truth is that am so lonely, have no love & affection at all in my life, I am just sooo desperate; that's why I can't trust men anymore
iamthenra
Well-known member
No worries...
I am having the same problems... The loneliness and isolation... Try doing it for 41 years without someone to love you... It's not fun!
According to Masslow who was a psychologist, he made a hierarchy of human needs. Which is nothing more than a list of things all humans need... The first thing is physiologic, then safety and security needs, love and belonging, esteem and self esteem, and self actualization is the last thing.... They have to be in that order, because one thing missing and you are stuck at that level until that need is met, then you can focus on the other needs above it... I am stuck in that "love and belonging" stage my entire life... At least according to Masslow....
Chiaroscuro
Active member
I'm 24 and I have never even kissed a girl. So you've already gone a lot further than me lol.
Forgive me if I'm wrong on this one, but it sounds very much like your desire is more complicated than just to enjoy the physical feeling of sex right? I mean it's a bit deeper that that I sense. So although a few have said you could just enjoy the sexual gratification, I'm not sure you will feel more fulfilled by doing that. Maybe you have got too hung up on the idea of having sex and so it now seems all important.
If I'm wrong and you are just horny as hell then my apologies hahaha
Forgive me if I'm wrong on this one, but it sounds very much like your desire is more complicated than just to enjoy the physical feeling of sex right? I mean it's a bit deeper that that I sense. So although a few have said you could just enjoy the sexual gratification, I'm not sure you will feel more fulfilled by doing that. Maybe you have got too hung up on the idea of having sex and so it now seems all important.
If I'm wrong and you are just horny as hell then my apologies hahaha
Sorry to hear it didn't work out for you...
Hopefully you'll find someone who is truly understanding and caring next time, not someone who is just pretending to be for their own hidden agenda. There are lots of nice people out there, just takes some time to find them =)[/QUOTE
Hey Guys, TERRIBLE news here
You were right, this guy was an *******. He just texted me saying he wanted to stop this relationship !!!!!!!!!!!!!;((((((((((((
I am DEVASTATED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We are supposed to talk about it this evening
