Very badly. There is no solution to my problems. I get beaten and abused at home and don't know where to go. I am struggling to go abroad but just got declined a job althought I already paid the CRB fee plus my journey to the training from my country etc., which was expensive. I did well on the interview because I was prepared but they apparently didn't like my behaviour. Not that I wasn't polite, on the contrary, but perhaps I looked too weird or ill to them so they considered I wasn't suitable for the job. I still plan to struggle on to get a live in job in families abroad, but at the same time I see how futile this is as it can't work. I hate living in strange families but at least I'd be away and got some money. I've also lived a lot in rented accomodation abroad before, but it was usually the cheapest and very crappy, sharing a house with many other people. (Once I was even bullied by the owner but she got better with time, don't know why). I supported myself with odd jobs or the worst paid ones (the money of which was stolen by my father anyway), because I have no qualification and have no idea what else I could do. Any job that is a bit better, I can't do that because I am like this. I still push myself even into more social jobs though because I don't want to give up but it's futile anyway as I either don't get hired at all, get kicked out soon, or drop off because I can't cope. Even if I had some rests of selfconfidence, it goes inevitably to the dogs as I'm trying to live. I am only ridiculous wherever I come. So I end up at home getting kicked and beaten by my father, calling me names, once he even said he would bring an axe and kill me. I know he wouldn't do that but I don't mind if he would. Maybe I really swallow some pills in the future, as this life is a disgrace.
I feel good- I am just going to keep on smiling today
pls do! I'll try the same! pm me ur time tonight and we'll see if we made it!![]()
It may sound crazy or something, but just do the same thing back. Or you could take a knife and splice it in his legs .. But then it's escalating. Why is he doing those things btw ?
::
Retaliatory action is not the answer getting the hell out of there is. On the job training is something you could look into. I, think if you choose to apply for animal attendant, you don’t have to deal with people as much as a veterinary nurse. It’s a hard industry to get into but prior experience isn’t necessarily needed even if they do say prior experience needed on the job listing, still apply for it.
I feel really crappy right now. ::
My friend invited 8 people over her house yesterday and when she found out only me, and two guys can make it she cancelled it because in her words there would be 'no point'.Then she decided to go ahead with it and i text back saying dont worry we will have fun and she text back saying 'hopefully'. This really made me feel like poop, am i really that boring to hang around with? :
: I wanted to cancel cause from that moment i felt useless. I went ahead anyway because i didnt want to be another person who let her down. Anyway another friend turned up so she spent most of the evening talking to her, ignoring me, and talking to the two guys.
I feel like such a useless friend. I don't know what i'm doing wrong. I've always been there for her, yet i feel like she treats me as just someone to fill up some space in the room. ::
Thank you for your advice Kat, I just looked into “Animal attendant” and almost all of the jobs are in Australia or New Zealand. I was obviously searching for this work over here before, but couldn't find anything apart from volunteering, or some part time/minimum wage work in the UK, plus must have experience. Apart from that it's hard to get it over the internet and even if I did, it would barely pay me the rent. I know one place where I could volunteer in exchange for accomodation and food, but it's in Mexico and I don't have money for the flight. And of course Australia or NZ would be perfect, but it's even more expensive and hard to get the visa and work permit.
Having a crush, in this situation, sometimes suck.
Maybe have someone put in a good word for you? That's what I would do if my friends we not just as shy as I am.