Aye, it's strange tae know people think highly of you or love ye an' yet you don't or can't feel tha same way in return.
Anyway, enough o' ma problems. You gonnae be okay, spring?
My brother is studying a master's degree in computer science and was rejected from night work at Coles.
Don't give up, mate!
. I couldn't get her to eat, drink, or walk after that. I know we HAD TO put her to sleep because I can't imagine the torture she was going through, and I couldn't stand to look at those sad sad eyes. If I had left her on her own she would have starved to death, and that would have been so unimaginable cruel to allow to happen. She was 16 and had a very good life, but I still really miss her . I still feel sad, I miss my dog. I still think she's there every time I open the door, but all that's left there is an empty blank space. We had to put her to sleep a few days ago, and no matter how old a pet is it still absolutely sucks. She was 16 and I got her when I was 6, so I had that dog almost my whole childhood. I think she suffered a stroke or seizure or something. I'm not exactly sure what it was but it was terrifying. I heard the most horrendous screaming noise and saw my dog thrashing around. My heart starting racing and I felt myself transitioning into that dreadful panic mode. After that horrible scream and sudden thrashing movements I never heard another sound out of her
On top of all this my Grandma is slowly dying, and I was close to her. I always visited at least once or twice a week. About a week ago they said she had 2 days to two weeks MAX to live, soooo it won't be long :/. I've been visiting as often as I can, but she is just so sick. Luckily her mind and memory are still 100% intact, and she is very sharp mentally which makes it a LOT easier to talk to her when you visit. Though her physical energy and health are deteriorating like mad. It's all a lot at once for me. The dog thing was very unexpected, when at that time I was already expecting an old relative to die soon. Having to wait for someone you love to die is absolutely agonizing.
This year hasn't had such a great start thus far lol, and January just ended! I had to put my dog to sleep, and have been waiting around for my grandmother to die. Not to mention having to deal with A LOT of ridiculous family drama surrounding this. In addition to quitting my part time job, and still having to deal with my normal OCD, social anxiety, and depression on a daily basis, this year kinda sucks so far. All that other stuff really goes on the back burner for now, since dealing with family is my priority right now. Sorry for the long vent, but I sure hope the rest of the year gets better.
