Srijita52
Well-known member
What's wrong dottie?
How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
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What's wrong dottie?
I know you don't like much sympathy, but it's so not right that anyone has to go through what you are right now. I can't help feel upset, so I can not even imagine you. You're a very strong person, you really are, I hope you don't give up because I see how hard you're trying. You even joined the army just to escape, dude you deserve some credit.
Opaline
1
When I start feeling bad about myself, depressed, crying, I feel pathetic. Like it's a bunch of nonsense and I am a pitiful, contemptuous mess that most people would find amusing/disgusting if they saw/heard me.
I remember the episode of Family Guy where they made fun of Meg being depressed, saying she was probably crying in her room with a box of tissues and a book of Sylvia Plath poems. I felt awful because I thought, that's me. I don't sit in my room reading Sylvia Plath but I am depressed. Does that make me laughable, a thing of mockery?
It's just a cartoon show, I know. I don't care about the show. It's the cultural message behind it. The stigma is just awful. If you're depressed, you're pathetic and weak, it seems. And that's repellent, no one wants to deal with that.
It makes me want to just suck it up and tough it all out, come what may. At least then I can't be mocked and called emo.
...but sometimes I really do just need to cry. I can't help it. Sometimes it builds up and just comes spilling out.
Ugh, sentimentality. I'm sick of it.
I remember the episode of Family Guy where they made fun of Meg being depressed, saying she was probably crying in her room with a box of tissues and a book of Sylvia Plath poems. I felt awful because I thought, that's me. I don't sit in my room reading Sylvia Plath but I am depressed. Does that make me laughable, a thing of mockery?
It's just a cartoon show, I know. I don't care about the show. It's the cultural message behind it. The stigma is just awful. If you're depressed, you're pathetic and weak, it seems. And that's repellent, no one wants to deal with that.
It makes me want to just suck it up and tough it all out, come what may. At least then I can't be mocked and called emo.
...but sometimes I really do just need to cry. I can't help it. Sometimes it builds up and just comes spilling out.
Ugh, sentimentality. I'm sick of it.
Srijita52
Well-known member
I'm sorry but don't be too hard on yourself. We all do things we regret later, its okay.
Srijita52
Well-known member
What I've seen is the people who think that others are pathetic and weak for feeling depressed often run to others for comfort when they're feelings this way themselves. Seems like in such cases they can't take their own advice and 'just suck it up'. Maybe I'm wrong though.
You're not pathetic for
being depressed or crying Tally, I think its better to let it all out then keep bottled up.
Opaline
1
This may very well be true.
I've often wondered about people who make fun of others with disabilities or disfigurements or mental illness or something. What if they suddenly suffered severe burns in an accident, or lost someone they loved unexpectedly and were severely depressed? Not so funny anymore, when you are the one suffering. And it could happen to anyone. I could be walking down the street one day and a piano falls on me, causing irreversible brain damage and the loss of both arms.
...okay, so maybe pianos aren't often hauled out of windows anymore.
And maybe I was being a bit extreme, and a bit tongue in cheek, but... you never know.
What was I talking about again?
Bedtime
I'm not a tea drinker, but I've cut down on the caffeine quite a bit. That part about room/body temperature is interesting. My room is in the basement and two of the walls are concrete, so you'd think it would be fairly cool in here. But it's not. I have to have a fan on when I sleep because I need white noise, and I always have it pointed in my direction. I'd rather be cold than hot. But lately I've had to put the fan smack dab in front of my face. I think the change in temperature is definitely effecting my sleep. This is why I hate summer!
I read for over an hour tonight and that made me tired. So I went with the flow and went to bed at 8pm. That bedtime doesn't exactly put me in with the cool kids, but I'll try anything at this point. I seem to have my mother's sleeping habits. My dad can get 5 or 6 hours of sleep and function perfectly. My mom and I can't. She usually goes to sleep around 8 or 9 (sometimes even earlier), gets up during the middle of the night for an hour or so to smoke and watch TV, goes back to bed, and wakes at 5 or 6. That seems to be the cycle that I am inheriting. I woke up at 12:30am today and I'll probably be up for a couple of hours before trying to go back to bed.
Alright. Enough about me.
Tired and crappy. Just got back from my course.... well, actually I've been home for an hour, but needed to veg out a bit and eat and then talked with my brother for a bit since I haven't seen him much the last 4 days.
It was an incredibly boring 5 hours. Thankfully we got three 10 min. breaks, which during then I mostly just read, only getting up once to walk around to stretch my legs while some random guy kept looking at me, probably wondering what the heck I was doing just wandering the hallway by myself.
My instructor was very ignorant though. He was very sarcastic, like cynically sarcastic. Don't get me wrong, sarcasm doesn't usually bother me (as it comes 2nd nature to me anyway
Didn't stop there though. Then soon after he uses me as an example for a body/size comparison demonstration (discussing alcohol). Usually I'm not self-conscious of my height nor body. Most of the time I'm okay with it... Until you start pointing it all out for everyone to stare at me. THAT is when I get extremely self-conscious and even more anxious. I get it. I've been told a million times -- I'm small, really small. I have the body of a 14 year old and look like I'm 12. Girls that age are usually taller than me. Everyone can stop pointing it out now and stop staring.
So yeah, I've been pretty depressed the rest of the night because of that. Stupid I know. Sorry for the rant. At least it's over. One step closer to getting my license. Now let's hope I can pull myself together within a year, or I hope much sooner, to get it.
I'd tell you to think nothing of it because this dude sounds like a dick, but I know that is easier said than done. Teachers are there to teach. Of course that is going to mean that they may quiz you at times. That's fine. But some teachers seem to get some kind of smug satisfaction out of watching their students squirm and feel uncomfortable. If you want to, try calling him out on it next time. Tell him you don't know the answer because he hasn't taught you well enough. Tell him that you are going to add him to the ever growing list of people who have singled you out because of your height. Or if it really bothered you, go above his head to a superior. Don't take his crap just because he is a teacher. That doesn't give him the right to make you feel inferior. That's just my $0.02.
I don't know what the definition of "that girl" is, but if you apologized, I'd say you're all squared up. When I do something stupid or cringe-worthy, it will bother me for a couple of days, but eventually it'll pass and I'll do something else that's stupid.
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This may very well be true.
I've often wondered about people who make fun of others with disabilities or disfigurements or mental illness or something. What if they suddenly suffered severe burns in an accident, or lost someone they loved unexpectedly and were severely depressed? Not so funny anymore, when you are the one suffering. And it could happen to anyone. I could be walking down the street one day and a piano falls on me, causing irreversible brain damage and the loss of both arms.
...okay, so maybe pianos aren't often hauled out of windows anymore.
And maybe I was being a bit extreme, and a bit tongue in cheek, but... you never know.
What was I talking about again?
Bedtime
Uh, sorry I meant to respond to you. I wonder about that too. What are they so confident about? They're not vulnerable, but they think it. Good Night Tally_Lyra
I'm not a tea drinker, but I've cut down on the caffeine quite a bit. That part about room/body temperature is interesting. My room is in the basement and two of the walls are concrete, so you'd think it would be fairly cool in here. But it's not. I have to have a fan on when I sleep because I need white noise, and I always have it pointed in my direction. I'd rather be cold than hot. But lately I've had to put the fan smack dab in front of my face. I think the change in temperature is definitely effecting my sleep. This is why I hate summer!
I read for over an hour tonight and that made me tired. So I went with the flow and went to bed at 8pm. That bedtime doesn't exactly put me in with the cool kids, but I'll try anything at this point. I seem to have my mother's sleeping habits. My dad can get 5 or 6 hours of sleep and function perfectly. My mom and I can't. She usually goes to sleep around 8 or 9 (sometimes even earlier), gets up during the middle of the night for an hour or so to smoke and watch TV, goes back to bed, and wakes at 5 or 6. That seems to be the cycle that I am inheriting. I woke up at 12:30am today and I'll probably be up for a couple of hours before trying to go back to bed.
Alright. Enough about me.
I'd tell you to think nothing of it because this dude sounds like a dick, but I know that is easier said than done. Teachers are there to teach. Of course that is going to mean that they may quiz you at times. That's fine. But some teachers seem to get some kind of smug satisfaction out of watching their students squirm and feel uncomfortable. If you want to, try calling him out on it next time. Tell him you don't know the answer because he hasn't taught you well enough. Tell him that you are going to add him to the ever growing list of people who have singled you out because of your height. Or if it really bothered you, go above his head to a superior. Don't take his crap just because he is a teacher. That doesn't give him the right to make you feel inferior. That's just my $0.02.
I don't know what the definition of "that girl" is, but if you apologized, I'd say you're all squared up. When I do something stupid or cringe-worthy, it will bother me for a couple of days, but eventually it'll pass and I'll do something else that's stupid.
Yea..Getting to the core of insomnia I agree with you about teachers, good she doesn't have to see him again. Many teachers when you get a smart mouth with them they yell at the top of their lungs.I said many not most. Someone who's power hungry don't take kindly to boldness.
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Srijita52
Well-known member
Yep, I agree. It can happen to anyone, maybe not the piano part though (or atleast I hope not).This may very well be true.
I've often wondered about people who make fun of others with disabilities or disfigurements or mental illness or something. What if they suddenly suffered severe burns in an accident, or lost someone they loved unexpectedly and were severely depressed? Not so funny anymore, when you are the one suffering. And it could happen to anyone. I could be walking down the street one day and a piano falls on me, causing irreversible brain damage and the loss of both arms.
...okay, so maybe pianos aren't often hauled out of windows anymore.
And maybe I was being a bit extreme, and a bit tongue in cheek, but... you never know.
What was I talking about again?
Bedtime
Good night.
This may very well be true.
I've often wondered about people who make fun of others with disabilities or disfigurements or mental illness or something. What if they suddenly suffered severe burns in an accident, or lost someone they loved unexpectedly and were severely depressed? Not so funny anymore, when you are the one suffering. And it could happen to anyone. I could be walking down the street one day and a piano falls on me, causing irreversible brain damage and the loss of both arms.
...okay, so maybe pianos aren't often hauled out of windows anymore.
And maybe I was being a bit extreme, and a bit tongue in cheek, but... you never know.
What was I talking about again?
Bedtime
I hear you about the stigma. I watch Family Guy a lot, so I know what you are talking about, though they do make fun of just about everyone. But does that make it right? I honestly don't know. I think humans have been pointing out the insecurities and illnesses of others for as long as we have been around. I'm pretty sure that it's a coping mechanism. We all have our special "things" that make us different from everyone else. Most of us want to hide those things. And part of that cycle is pointing out the flaws in others. I know that when I get defensive when people are pointing out my flaws, I fight back and spew some pretty awful verbal abuse. I don't know how many times I have torn down my mom or my sister by throwing things from years ago back in their face. I always feel bad about it, even when I'm saying it. But my instinct is to protect myself. I'm not defending it. I just think the potential to do so is in all of us. I don't understand making fun of people with disabilities or disfigurements, though. I'll never understand that. I remember people making fun of the kids with Down's Syndrome in high school and silently wishing that those people would be hit with some kind of debilitating illness. The level of insensitivity present to think that a paraplegic or a burn victim is a funny sight is off the charts. And it makes me really angry. But I've never been brave enough to say anything to those who find it funny. I'm always too scared.
::You do have to watch out for falling pianos, though. I've dodged a few myself. It's cosmic karma trying to kick my ass. :
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I hear you about the stigma. I watch Family Guy a lot, so I know what you are talking about, though they do make fun of just about everyone. But does that make it right? I honestly don't know. I think humans have been pointing out the insecurities and illnesses of others for as long as we have been around. I'm pretty sure that it's a coping mechanism. We all have our special "things" that make us different from everyone else. Most of us want to hide those things. And part of that cycle is pointing out the flaws in others. I know that when I get defensive when people are pointing out my flaws, I fight back and spew some pretty awful verbal abuse. I don't know how many times I have torn down my mom or my sister by throwing things from years ago back in their face. I always feel bad about it, even when I'm saying it. But my instinct is to protect myself. I'm not defending it. I just think the potential to do so is in all of us. I don't understand making fun of people with disabilities or disfigurements, though. I'll never understand that. I remember people making fun of the kids with Down's Syndrome in high school and silently wishing that those people would be hit with some kind of debilitating illness. The level of insensitivity present to think that a paraplegic or a burn victim is a funny sight is off the charts. And it makes me really angry. But I've never been brave enough to say anything to those who find it funny. I'm always too scared.
Someone who say such thing it seems like arguing with them would be relentless. Do they have any guilt? I really don't think society accepts that and it makes most people upset because it's taboo to make fun of someone who is physically injured. More people do make fun of mentally handicap people, it's not accepted in many places, but many mock them a lot. Hopefully they've grown up since highschool. I agree with most things you've said. When I want to confront people like that I think of them as idiots overall and me doing my service.
Srijita52
Well-known member
Its awful when friends change, have you told him that you're getting hurt by him?
Falkor
1
Hey you're post makes a lot of sense. A lot of people they don't wanna hear other's rambling because it's pissing them off or make them feel tired, they just say, do it in your own room, crying kid. Or something like that. They do a lot with me too. I was even crying about the fact that people told me to just .... off. I needed affection. But hey, you know what I figured out so far? Is that they say it, because they see you struggling and they want you to shut that down, because if they keep on giving you comfort through the crying, you will do it again. I think we of course need affection, that's the thing we want. But they just want to enjoy life and not drag you in tears, just shut down the depressive moods and ''stop nagging and start being realistic'' i guess that's what their trying to say.
But the funny thing is, we both have a very good point.
1.We CAN'T just shut down a depression, that's impossible in one go.
2.They want us to stop, which is good eh
But if comes to the family guy, hm... It's rude. I've been told that to by my parents. It's very hurting us, like that ppl don't accept that we're crying and makes us even more upset. Though it's hurting, it's still good to realize that their right that we should change that behaviour, and not ask for their affection everyday, because then we can't help ourselves.
Hmm, yeah strange. I don't know if my answer makes sense. Just trying to be psychological about Family guy.... Surfing USA....:
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MikeyC
Well-known member
I agree with what you're saying, but Family Guy is supposed to be controversial.
TheGirlInTheCorner
Well-known member
I don't know how to read dreams so I'm just going to have to take your word for it! It's nothing to worry about, for sure. Just going to pen that down as another strange dream.
You like to dissect dreams? Do you think they have a meaning to them?
Yes, you could say that. It comes from remembering four or five dreams per night in extreme detail. I thought it was just a silly hobby (that made a lot of sense to me), until I had to write an essay on eye witnesses and how they recall stuff. Then it kind of explained the scientific bits of dreams too.
MikeyC
Well-known member
You remember 4 dreams explicitly? Wow, that's very impressive. I can go weeks without remembering dreams. That's really cool.
Srijita52
Well-known member
Wow that's really cool!
TheGirlInTheCorner
Well-known member
As a rule, yes. It used to be pointless because no one ever wants to hear them and i wondered what the point of remembering was if i couldnt do anything with it. so I learnt to interpret them instead, though some dreams are just plain nonsense and some are just our memories overflowing, spilling out into our dreams. I love that I can remember my dreams, but in other parts of my life, my memories are screwy! :
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