getting de-friended on facebook

[2QuietForThem]

There's a good chance that it was just an accident. I have about 40 "friends" on FB, and I've been de-friended a few times. I don't let it bother me. I feel that the person who clicked that button is the one missing out.

 

[Etbow23]

I wonder about this myself. I don't understand why someone would want to have less friends on facebook. But I guess i'll always wonder what goes through the minds of "normal" people

 

[chibiXphantom]

well i personally just delete people regularly, like a friendslist "spring cleaning". i just delete the ones that never use facebook, post too much annoying stuff, or just delete people to make a certain number of people i like (usually ending in a 0 or 5 cause im weird like that). its nothing personal at all. if they really wanted to they could send a friend request if they cared that much about it or send a message.

for me its just a communications device. nothing more. being un-friended by me isn't to be taken harshly like i hate you or something. i just like certain numbers and only close friends veiwing my stuff.

idk, maybe its just me, but i dont get overly attatched to people and dont get offended by much at all. if someone unfriended me i wouldnt care. i only care about being friends with like 2 of the people i have on there. maybe its just cause im not a fan of people to begin with and like privacy

 

[kimberme]

This happens a lot.... our social anxiety makes us think that it's something WE did.... but usually it's because the person who deleted us was more concerned that they were being too social.... they probably deleted more than just you and thought they needed to stop letting everyone seetheir business...feelings... photos... etc... what u should know is that it has happened to me... and I was baffled also... please don't let ur feelings overwhelm you.. smile lol

 

[no123one]

You should watch the South Park episode about Facebook, it really puts FB and social networking into perspective.

For me, if I pm somebody and they don't get back to me at all (I give them a few weeks) that's when I pull the plug and delete them.

 

[Hellhound]

In my opinion, not as bad as the girl on my Facebook who said that she wouldn't be friends with anyone who didn't have a Facebook because that must mean they have something to hide, or they are weird

Just watch as people start making this idea even more and more popular in the future, and then having a Facebook will be like a requisite to be considered normal.

The thought of it depresses me.

 

[MikeyC]

Just watch as people start making this idea even more and more popular in the future, and then having a Facebook will be like a requisite to be considered normal.

The thought of it depresses me.

I saw an article a couple of days ago where people are turning down jobs because they are not allowed to access Facebook at work. Yikes. You know something is taking over when that starts happening.

Of course, the media could be sensationalising it....

 

[Hellhound]

I saw an article a couple of days ago where people are turning down jobs because they are not allowed to access Facebook at work. Yikes. You know something is taking over when that starts happening.

Of course, the media could be sensationalising it....

I can actually believe something like that, it wouldn't surprise me. What a bunch of morons.

 

[MikeyC]

I can actually believe something like that, it wouldn't surprise me. What a bunch of morons.

Yes, morons. Wait until I post my status on Facebook about this! I can't wait to see how many likes it'll get!

 

[Hellhound]

Yes, morons. Wait until I post my status on Facebook about this! I can't wait to see how many likes it'll get!

 

[Flanscho]

Every few weeks I go through my facebook friends list and defriend people.

Why? Because I like to be able to post things to my friends list, knowing that people I consider 'friend' are reading it. If I thinkt hat I have no connection anymore to a person, that I'm not interested in a person and that this person ain't interested in me, then I wait a while, and if things don't change, I defriend that person.

I like a small friends list full of people whom I value and who value me.

I don't like a friends list with hundreds of names of which I don't know most of the people.

Normally when I defriend someone, I send them a message, like "don't take this personal, but I like to have a short friends list, and we won't probably meet anytime soon or have anything to do with each other anyway".

 

[Gaucho]

i don't know if i got defriended, but nobody ever sended a friend request, haha. its not even possible, because no one knows me.

 

[Kat]

I wouldn't worry about it too much
I have never really like that place so I never go.

 

[Foxface]

Do you ever get de-friended on fb and not understand why?
I must admit i'm not a frequent user of fb but upon going on recently i discovered a couple of my former work friends are now gone off my facebook.

Does anyone know whats the purpose of doing this is?...i mean just becasue you havnt spoken to them for ages??? its not like your profile is causing any inconvience to them...it means they physicaaly have had to make the consious effort to click that button, but why? is it a chore if you have too many friends on your list if you want to chat to the regular ones or somthing?

For me i've only ever did this to someone whos been mean to me....i couldn't give a rats who else is on my list. maybe i'm just reading too much into this..but thats what having SA does to oneself.

Yes, but not a lot lately. I even get blocked a few times, and I take that very personalally. Getting unfriended is one thing, getting blocked is another. I take it to heart, maybe I think too strongly of Facebook friends, but it's like if someone is a friend IRL, and they suddenly hate me, even though I never speak to them.

Most people on my friends list, I don't know. They are friends of friends of people with Autism, a few Naturist related friends aswell.

A couple years ago. I met a girl on POF on-line, and I added her to Facebook, all well and good, then I asked her if we could hang out, and she blocked me.

Also, people who I really like (like a crush, even if I never speak to them), if they block/unfriend me, it makes me really upset. I get way too many rejects. Lately,my friends list, has been stable. A couple of people went off, but it was due to "account inactivity" but they came back a few days later.

 

[laure15]

I don't use facebook anymore; my account is 'dead' so to speak but not deactivated. One reason why I stay away from facebook is because it makes me feel even worse. When I see people posting happy pictures of themselves having fun with other people and smiling, I get kind of jealous and feel pain in my heart. Facebook made me become more aware of my situation as a social outcast.

 

[Foxface]

I don't use facebook anymore; my account is 'dead' so to speak but not deactivated. One reason why I stay away from facebook is because it makes me feel even worse. When I see people posting happy pictures of themselves having fun with other people and smiling, I get kind of jealous and feel pain in my heart. Facebook made me become more aware of my situation as a social outcast.

Same here. It breaks my heart when I see that. Seeing people who have all the things I want, but can't have, such as being normal, have boyfriends/girlfriends, good social skills etc.

 

[OceanMist]

Very interesting. I'm not saying that's a good interesting, just interesting that facebook is somewhat similar to real life.

Of course, in real life I get "unfriended" way more than I ever would on facebook, so yeah.

I'm a straight shooter so I will give my honest opinion: most or if not all of those people defriended you because they don't want to hurt their reputation. Shyness can be seen as a weak trait and many people out there don't want people to think they are friends with someone is inept socially because they think whoever sees that they are friends with you will assume that the person who is friends with you is socially inept too. I hope that made sense.

That's why that site can be bad for people....especially people who are dealing with SA. I'm sure I would get defriended on there a lot as I don't have any friends so I would imagine I would have some problems on there with holding on to friends or having friend requests rejected and such. You aren't alone, believe me.

I just haven't gotten a facebook page because I don't want old friends talking to me and bothering me about how I never go out or never hang out with anyone. It's really none of their business and I don't feel like hearing them whine.

I've found that like 99% of people don't understand why people like me like to be hermits. I get sick of having to explain it to people and hearing them not understand. I'd rather just not have facebook so I don't have to deal with it. They've got plenty of friends anyway, all of em do. They don't need me.

 

[OceanMist]

Something else I want to add is to not let the rejections get to you. Those are just individual people that may not like you for whatever reason (probably your SA in many cases) and it doesn't mean that other people won't like you. There are many potential friends out there.

Don't let a few bad apples bother you. Rejection happens, it's part of life. I've been rejected a lot lately by women in real life, so I know how you are feeling. You just have to remember that you are not a bad guy, people will like you, you just gotta find em. That's been tough for me to do due to lack of motivation and shyness and all that.

It's just something that must be accepted by everyone.

Everyone has enemies, everyone has people that will like them. <----Damn, you can quote me on that line. Sounded good.

 

[Nathália]

Facebook is like a twilight zone. I don't want to feel like anything from my past, I don't even want to feel like I do now.
When someone un-friend me, it's irrelevant. I don't really feel a connection towards anyone through Facebook, it feels really shallow. Most things online feel shallow, except for here. Shallow friendships are a waste of my time and I could make a long rant about why they are. It makes me feel like I'm back in grade school.

 

[Agent_Violet]

now that i started using my fb again, I delete people who never have anything positive to say. the constant complainers. i get venting every now and then but every single day is ridiculous. it brings me down and i find it healthier to just delete them.