Do people with Avoidant personality have any friends?

sullyS25

Well-known member
#21
I have friends. Not many but the ones i have are loyal. Im ok with not having a lot of friends too. Quality not quantity. People that surround themselves with huge groups of friends can also be very insecure.
 

Dreamscape

Well-known member
#22
I figure out that I have none that really cares about me. I think it's about how you treat to other person also, give love to get love. I'm terrible at showing my love to people therefore most of them are distant to me. thus begin my isolation.
 

jaim38

Well-known member
#23
I do, but I haven't hung out with my friends in a long time. They probably think I'm lazy or unwilling to communicate with them. Right now, I'm too afraid to tell them that I have social phobia, avpd, and other mental problems. I want to wait until I get job before explaining to them my behavior.
 

Isolated_Writer

Well-known member
#24
for me, its hard to except people as my friend. I don't know your situation but if i havent known people for years (five at least i'd say) and maintained a close relationship that whole time, i don't really consider them friends. for me its possible to have close friends, but everyone just out there. It makes me uncomfortable to have people call me their friend if i don't think that. so, maybe your friend feels like that.
 

Barrier

Well-known member
#25
I sort of have friends, but most of them live far away so I don't really count them as friends. Also deep down I still feel I don't have friends after years of truly not having any. I guess also it's cause I am not the first choice of friend if you know what I mean. I feel people call me when there's no one else left, as a back up that's always there. (edit: if I get called at all, I am easy to forget about apparentley).
 
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#26
Crazy thought. Could we become each other's friends? If anyone understand AvPD, it's us, right? I'd love to get to know some of you guys better :)
 
#27
I used to have several friends. Some of them I chucked for good reasons or bad. Some of them chucked me.

Apart from siblings (not all of them) I have one friend now. Technically, that makes her my best friend. I wouldn't call her that because we don't have a best friend degree of friendship. That could change, but if it does it will take time.
 

onehandclapping

Well-known member
#28
i'm usually quite accepting if someone wants to get to know me, but recently I have been thinking that I shouldn't bother to lead people on since I will only end up disappearing again at some point. I have 1 irl friend and i've been avoiding them since christmas, I keep thinking about disappearing from their life.

:/
 
#29
The only friends i have are the ones that chose me. I have one close friend right now and she is the exact opposite of me. Outgoing, a little pushy, ambitious and LOTS of energy. She decided to be friends with me and wouldnt be detered with my frequent and extended absenses. She just waits a while and then cooks my favorite meal and tempts me out of the house.
 

The Lost

Well-known member
#30
I do. One friend, who I've been close to since childhood, that I still see regularly. I don't know what I'd do if they decided to break it up or just disappeared without a trace. I made some friends during my final teenage years, but they always felt flimsy and liable to implode at any given moment, which was true. Into my 20s, I discovered how impossible it was to befriend other adults, not that I'm blaming anyone, that's just life and everyone's preoccupied and settled by then, but this has made me grateful for having a long-time friend and more vigilant of other people.
 

Ithior

Well-known member
#31
I think I might have AvPD and I don't have close friends. I have a fair deal of friends but I can't be myself around many of them and I certainly don't share my secrets with any of them.
 

Steelsoul

Well-known member
#32
I do have a few friends, even a close friend. But they are the ones who try to build up the friendship, not me. I appreciate their effort to be friend to me, which must be hard because i don't fit in society. I can only feel comfortable around the ones who gained my trust, and they tried hard to do so. So i would be happy if they called me their friend, and i can proudly say they are friends of mine.
 

sahxox

Well-known member
#33
It took me 6-12 months of schooling to be comfortable around 2 people I still call friends today, and now they're like family... I see people I think I'd get along with, but have so much trouble forging a connection, I get disheartened that easily. I usually just let it slide, but I'm getting beyond sick of doing that it's sad. :/ You want to feel accepted so then you have confidence to make friends, but you can't unless you have friends bla bla it's annoying. Atm it's almost month 3 at my new workplace and trudging along slowly. I find it's hard for me to always be both ready to handle conversation and ready to initiate it. If I'm assertive it's all good - I can do this either by making myself happy by laughing about stuff or by mustering up confidence by focusing on the positives before I arrive. Once you get confidence, it seems to snowball and you feel invincible. Again, sustaining this is the issue. All this pain we seem to go through really does make us stronger when we learn to learn from it. I guess I'm a work in progress :)
 

Quietguy11

Well-known member
#34
I have an personality of avoidance, and I have three close friends. For some reason none of my friends seem to know I go through this psychological struggle, so it doesn't effect our friendship any. There's actually only a select few people who I tend to avoid. People that I am not compatible with in the least. My friends, on the other end of the spectrum, are people that I enjoy being around despite my social anxiety.
 

Steiner

Well-known member
#35
It doesn't feel like it. I don't have any friends so...:alone:

I haven't met anyone that stayed and tried to gain my trust completely and who I could be socially free around. Though I guess it's possible, it's just all the people I knew have abandoned me.

It could also be the fact that I have schizoid personality along with avoidant personality. So if it were just avoidant I could see it being possible. I just end up killing all possibilities of friendship at the root.
 
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JuicyFruit

Well-known member
#36
There is not much hope for people who tries to be friend with me.
People have always been after me to hurt me and deceive me, so I have learned to never trust anyone and accept friendship. It's sad and I cry.
But you are very welcome to try me.
 

nicole1

Well-known member
#37
I have/had friends. I don't hang out with them much and prefer my facebook friends and the further they are, the closer we are. It's just easier. No pressure to hang out and that. It's a choice. *shrug*
 

Richey

Well-known member
#39
i'm always shocked when people want to be my friend. two of the more talkative people at my last job really liked me. I kept thinking that this must be some other universe that isn't earth and that it couldn't actually be true. I found out they liked what I talked about, so because we had similar interests in hobbies, music, sports etc. they liked me for that. Which was good enough for me !!!
 
#40
I have a few friends yes, but I hate having a bunch of friends. It confuses me way too much and there's times where I do actually enjoy my own company. Usually when I have too many friends, I tend to get overwhelmed and feel more anxious than usual.
 
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