dear coyote

[coyote]

Dear Coyote,

How do i become as awsome as Hubert?. When he retires id like to take his position .

Sincerely,

TLG

dear TLG,

thank you for your interest in the position. although we currently do not have anything available at this time, we will be happy to keep your submission on file to be considered for any future openings.

good luck!

 

[coyote]

Dear coyote,

What are yours and Huberts' opinions on coleslaw?

Twiggle

dear Twiggle,

my assistant, Hubert, prefers coleslaw that is neither too creamy nor too vinegary. ideally, it should be fresh, crunchy, and rough cut (rather than finely shredded). a little celery salt is always a bonus.

i usually order the fries.

 

[twiggle]

dear Twiggle,

my assistant, Hubert, prefers coleslaw that is neither too creamy nor too vinegary. ideally, it should be fresh, crunchy, and rough cut (rather than finely shredded). a little celery salt is always a bonus.

i usually order the fries.

Great!
This means Hubert and I can happily share coleslaw when we next go for dinner

 

[coyote]

Great!
This means Hubert and I can happily share coleslaw when we next go for dinner

dear twiggle,

my assistant, Hubert, is greatly looking forward to the occasion

 

[MikeyC]

dear MikeyC,

if you're referring to Charisma Carpenter, i would have to agree

my assistant, Hubert, is particularly fond of her tattoo

Dear coyote,

Tell Hubert to keep his hands off Charisma. That tattoo was specially made for me!

 

[coyote]

Dear coyote,

Tell Hubert to keep his hands off Charisma. That tattoo was specially made for me!

dear MikeyC,

my assistant, Hubert, has graciously agreed not to use his hands

 

[MikeyC]

dear MikeyC,

my assistant, Hubert, has graciously agreed not to use his hands

Dear coyote,

That's not what I meant!!

 

[Section_31]

Dear Coyote,

I have reasonable suspicion to believe there is a vampire or perhaps vampires among us on SPA.

I would like to request immediate military and superhero assistance to combat this growing threat. Additionally, id like to submit an aplpication that the community of SPW as a whole, relocate to MikeyC's house, as everyone knows the sun never sets in austrialia . Vs being where SPW is now, 30 days of night in the winter, which i must point out is fast approaching.

Ive already organized an evac/protection plan. We'll need approximately 8 or 9 battallions of marines to complete this objective and hope the vampiric epidemic does not spread. MikeyC is also issueing stake shaped boomerangs to everyone.

Jewel is making her way to the blarney stone for good luck as well!

My part in this amazing operation is to construct containment igloos for said vampiric victims in the far north. For this task ill be using canada's army of 17 horses and 3 men >.>

Any further suggestions on an anti vampiric epidemic plan?

I should mention i was fed a very potent strange tasting beverage prior to these events. So while i may not necesarily be right on any of this i promise i really do have compelling evidence of a vampiric presence!!

 

[MikeyC]

^ I'll stock up on garlic!

 

[Hoppy]

as everyone knows the sun never sets in austrialia .

I've been taught that the reason the sun never sets on the British empire is because God doesn't trust an Englishman in the dark.

Interesting to see it also now extends to Australians.::

 

[Section_31]

technically that WOULD extend to canadians as well, LOL, being a former british colony

 

[coyote]

Dear Coyote,

I have reasonable suspicion to believe there is a vampire or perhaps vampires among us on SPA.

I would like to request immediate military and superhero assistance to combat this growing threat. Additionally, id like to submit an aplpication that the community of SPW as a whole, relocate to MikeyC's house, as everyone knows the sun never sets in austrialia . Vs being where SPW is now, 30 days of night in the winter, which i must point out is fast approaching.

Ive already organized an evac/protection plan. We'll need approximately 8 or 9 battallions of marines to complete this objective and hope the vampiric epidemic does not spread. MikeyC is also issueing stake shaped boomerangs to everyone.

Jewel is making her way to the blarney stone for good luck as well!

My part in this amazing operation is to construct containment igloos for said vampiric victims in the far north. For this task ill be using canada's army of 17 horses and 3 men >.>

Any further suggestions on an anti vampiric epidemic plan?

I should mention i was fed a very potent strange tasting beverage prior to these events. So while i may not necesarily be right on any of this i promise i really do have compelling evidence of a vampiric presence!!

^ I'll stock up on garlic!

I've been taught that the reason the sun never sets on the British empire is because God doesn't trust an Englishman in the dark.

Interesting to see it also now extends to Australians.::

technically that WOULD extend to canadians as well, LOL, being a former british colony

dear The Lone Gunman,

my assistant, Hubert, has been working diligently to identify any suspected sufferers of either Porphyric Hemophilia or Sanguinare Vampiris, but has thus far been unsuccessful

as this forum does not base membership on illness status, it would be difficult for me to support any plan to discriminate against sufferers of any specific disease. therefore, i must, with due conscience, reject your proposal (brilliant as it was).

now, if you will excuse me, i need to go sharpen my fangs and purchase some SPF 500, a hooded sweatshirt, and some dark sunglasses for my trip to Australia.

thanks for the tip!

 

[Hoppy]

Dear Coyote

What works best? Silver bullets or wooden stakes?

The reason I am asking is because my budget doesn't allow the purchase of silver, but that I can easily make wooden stakes.

Please set my mind at rest.

 

[coyote]

Dear Coyote

What works best? Silver bullets or wooden stakes?

The reason I am asking is because my budget doesn't allow the purchase of silver, but that I can easily make wooden stakes.

Please set my mind at rest.

dear Hoppy,

the weapons you mentioned are ideal for different purposes. the wooden stake is the best choice for close combat situations where your enemy is immediately upon you and you are not afforded the luxury of time to aim and target satisfactorily. silver bullets obviously imply the use of a firearm with which to project them. this allows for you to keep your enemy at a distance, which is always preffered.

your potential target is also of considerable importance. silver weapons, including bullets, are traditionally necessary for eliminating werewolves. wooden stakes, on the other hand, are needed for destroying vampires.

good hunting!

 

[A Many Splendored Thing]

Thanks Coyote. What a long and thorough response! It was helpful and appreciated, especially from someone who has been on both sides.

 

[GraybeardGhost]

Dear Coyote,

We haven't heard much about Hubert lately. Did he run off to Vegas with that waitress you mentioned? I only ask because she took my order for a bacon cheeseburger deluxe with tater tots and a large chocolate shake, and then never came back. That was three days ago, and I'm getting rather hungry. I would be very grateful for any information you could provide regarding his or her whereabouts, and also maybe some crackers or something to tide me over. Thank you for your kind attention to this matter.

Sincerely,
Waiting on a Waitress in Waco

 

[MarionBerry]

Dear coyote,

My friend is on a dragon boat team and had a paddle choice question. As the resident expert in paddle design I thought I would throw it out to you. The new paddle she is thinking about has a shaft that is 1/2" longer than her normal paddle. The longer shaft is supposed to help the stroke go deeper and the thrust be stronger. One-half inch doesn't seem like very much to her so her question to you: how much difference will that 1/2" make?

Kind regards,
MarionBerry

 

[hoddesdon]

^ is this really about dragon boats and paddles?

 

[coyote]

Dear coyote,

My friend is on a dragon boat team and had a paddle choice question. As the resident expert in paddle design I thought I would throw it out to you. The new paddle she is thinking about has a shaft that is 1/2" longer than her normal paddle. The longer shaft is supposed to help the stroke go deeper and the thrust be stronger. One-half inch doesn't seem like very much to her so her question to you: how much difference will that 1/2" make?

Kind regards,
MarionBerry

dear MarionBerry,

it has been my experience that a deeper stroke and stronger thrust are highly prized in most situations, so any extra shaft length is to her benefit. the real advantage is in the repetitive nature of the stroking, er paddling - although the 1/2" may only add an incremental amount of driving force to each individual stroke, it is the overall cumulative effect of all the strokes in a repetitive rhythm that will come together to drive her vessel as far and as fast she wants to take it

 

[coyote]

Dear Coyote,

We haven't heard much about Hubert lately. Did he run off to Vegas with that waitress you mentioned? I only ask because she took my order for a bacon cheeseburger deluxe with tater tots and a large chocolate shake, and then never came back. That was three days ago, and I'm getting rather hungry. I would be very grateful for any information you could provide regarding his or her whereabouts, and also maybe some crackers or something to tide me over. Thank you for your kind attention to this matter.

Sincerely,
Waiting on a Waitress in Waco

dear Waiting,

my assistant, Hubert, has most recently been paid a visit by his cousin, Gaston (who is something of a troublemaker). if your waitress has gone missing, it would mostly likely be due to Gaston's influence - unfortunately, i have very little control over him.

my assistant, Hubert, is due to return to his appointed rounds tomorrow morning. if he knows anything about this, I will inform you post haste.