Have you ever tried to get a girlfriend or boyfriend?

[Felgen]

Of course, that doesn't really matter in many cases. In my environment, there are plenty of people who are both smarter and more attractive than myself. That's life, huh.

No matter how smart you are, someone else will be smarter; no matter how strong you are, someone else will always be stronger and no matter how good-looking you are, someone else will alway be better looking. Thinking that all the women are "reserved" for the guy who's better at you in one thing isn't going to get you anywhere.

 

[be_noticed]

i never try. usually avoid. im not mentally able to be in a relationship yet. i mean i cant even keep my friends. i really dont like being touched and i have low self confidence :l
but i daydream about alot of guys ::

 

[ShyViking81]

Well, I sort of tried to last March but I blew it. It was during a school reunion.

After the official reunion ended, a bunch of us went to a local pub. While I was there, I sat next to one of my old classmates. We talked for a bit and she seemed interested in me.
After sitting there for a while, talking, her best friend came and joined us. A few minutes later, her friend asked me, in front of the WHOLE group, if I could let her friend spend the night at my house.
My mind went blank because I couldn't believe she asked me that. I freaked out and didn't really give her an answer. After that, the girl seemed disinterested in me and went off with her friend.
Had I not still been living at home, I probably would have said yes... ::

 

[Feathers]

Well, I sort of tried to last March but I blew it. It was during a school reunion.

After the official reunion ended, a bunch of us went to a local pub. While I was there, I sat next to one of my old classmates. We talked for a bit and she seemed interested in me.
After sitting there for a while, talking, her best friend came and joined us. A few minutes later, her friend asked me, in front of the WHOLE group, if I could let her friend spend the night at my house.
My mind went blank because I couldn't believe she asked me that. I freaked out and didn't really give her an answer. After that, the girl seemed disinterested in me and went off with her friend.
Had I not still been living at home, I probably would have said yes... ::

Hm, you could joke a bit that Martians have kidnapped your sofa (or your brain, if you ever get the courage to call her...)? I am thinking it might still be allright to call her and ask her out for a drink or something? To take it slow..
I think it's quite normal you freaked out in public.. You could also shrug and say, 'Hey, I'm no hotel...' or joke around a bit how she would have to 'earn' it by doing the dishes or scrubbing the floor.. (Though this could turn her off a bit lol, or offer to do iffy things lol.. which you might not want to start with.. depends how it's done..)
If she only needed a place to crash cause she was out of time it's different than if she really likes you... If she really likes you she'll be okay with going a bit more slow about this too.. You're not 15 anymore, are you? (Get to know her well first though.. what she does now etc.. is she just jumping from one bad relationship to another or could she be interested in long-term? Did she think you didn't like her or was disappointed cause you didn't say yes? - Maybe the friend was just trying to break the ice, if s/he knew she was shy.. So, things to find out.. Keep your eyes open though, if she got disappointed over something like that, not sure how grown up she is though? Of course if she always had a crush on you and was hoping for more, maybe the disappointment is normal.. )

 

[Jamovik]

I tried getting a girlfriend. I failed....

 

[vj288]

I tried getting a girlfriend. I failed....

I didn't try and I didn't get one either...

 

[dutchguy]

I tried... or well, I'm still trying. It's been little baby steps, but I feel I'm getting ahead.

My advice; start trying now if you're not already doing it, however hard it may be. I've spent many hours experiencing extreme anxiety, worry and self-doubt, but even the small glimpses of finally finding someone to love have somehow, in retrospect, been worth it.

 

[Interzone]

What counts as trying?

 

[Forgotten-Children]

During Highschool, I tried desprately to get a boyfriend but no guys would even think about going out with me (one guy even pretended he was gay so I would stop talking to him about it..)

I kinda just gave up then and accepted the fact that I would never be with someone... until the boyfriend I have now found me on a Pokemon forum. xD Luck I guess? He only wanted to talk to me because of my name there (it's different than the one here)

But guys, just keep at it. :3 *hugs* You'll find someone.

 

[Aussie_Lad]

I tried asking out a girl from work once, and she said that she did not go out with co-workers. Otherwise opportunities havn't really fallen my way.

There was one other girl at work that I was fairly interested in, but she is in a relationship, and while I believe I am probably a better man for her than the other guy, I can't force things to happen. I did drop several hints though, waiting for her to pick up on them. I've more or less given up on her now, as I have the feeling I am only the go-to person when she has something playing on her mind that she needs my opinion on.

 

[nchurdler]

I use to be shy in high school. I wanted to make a change so I began looking around and found that there is an entire community of people with the same problem. Its called the seduction community. Many of those guys have social dynamics broken down to a science. You DO have to get some confidence and get out there and practice but there are a LOT of products out there that teach you everything from how to get confidence to body language and what to say. Eventually you just start to become an out going, quick witted, lovable person. I am so glad I found it. It changed my life. Check out sites and blogs like Attract A Girlfriend Quality Life With Quality Women Attract A Girlfriend

 

[N1LOY]

Find one who also has same problems as you, try to solve together, fix each other. Oh how I want one so badly! I rather stay by myself until College.

My suggestion:
Go to community places, like maybe join a chess club / book club / library... I don't know much, but you should find some places near your area. Start with small.

 

[JamesSmith]

This probably sounds weird to people, but I hate how we have this desire to date the opposite sex. I actually wish that we weren't romantically attracted to anyone. Then we'd never even have to think about how we want to get a g/f, wife or get laid.

 

[Shant]

Honestly, come to think of it, I don't think I ever have even tried.

And I still don't really have the motivation to try, just don't see the reason to try. There's a number of possible reasons behind that, though.

 

[leave_me_alone]

I had a girlfriend when i was 16. Since then, i havent asked anyone.

 

[Ryguy2598]

Okay, so you really want to know WHERE to meet women? The truth is you can literally meet a women just about ANYWHERE. The coffee shop, walking down the street, etc. you know just everyday places. Why do you say you can't meet a women at the store? What's stopping you? You can go up to a cute girl in the store and comment on something.....you know, just make observations about what she's doing, what is she looking at. Try to make it spontaneous, and as long as you go up w/ confidence, (I know, seems hard w/ SA), and don't do anything dumb or weird you're fine. The point I'm making is just that there's really no limit as to where you can strike up a conversation w/ a girl.....you just have to know what you're doing.

 

[Nanita]

For me, relationships are tricky. I have been in several relationships, and the longer ones got dificult in the end, partly because of my issues (depression and social anxiety). A relationship can be going fine, but I always feel that I don´t fit into my partners family/friends, etcetera. And then it starts to get obvious that I don´t have so many plans/goals, that it´s difficult for me to get things going in my life.
My damn issues are always the main problem in my relationships.
I´m always hessitating when meeting someone who´s interested in a relationship with me - because I really think I have too many issues to be able to function in a relationship. But then I TRY, because a part of me believes that it will be fine, and of course I also want company/love/sex/a life with things to do/be... and it always always gets difficult because of those exact reasons that made me hessitate in the first place.

 

[Noop]

nah, not really, plus i'm a bit passed my "use-by-date" now.

women best stay away from me to be honest, i have nothing to offer.

you can't expect me to start caring NOW after all these years of nothing.

 

[Richey]

I usually just try to talk about music or something funny and usually what happens is I develop a crush and I get the impression that the girl likes me as well, but i have found that lately because they work near where i work that other guys from my department have actualy asked the same girls out and do it in the "your place or mine" kind of straight edged way. Its happened right in front of me and I just sank in my chair as I watched my manager ask out the girl i liked and had talked to a lot right in front of me, it was like one of those nightmare scenes in movies. Something similar happened again a few months later.

My last girlfriend ended up seeing my best friend behind my back, they would both show up at my doorstep all happy and flirty and I knew straight away what was happening and I just said to both of them what the hell are you both playing at here.

So this has made me realise that crushes are just a really bad idea, for me they are. Because after 9+ occasions the girls i have gotten on well with are either with someone or they are being chased by someone else who possibly have a better chance anyway of creating a relationship.

This has meant that I have learnt not to have crushes on people who I don't know enough about. Because it just ends up being heart break. I think the only way now is to create situations where a girl likes me and not me doing the initial crush and being interested part.

 

[ilovenoodles]

Yep, some tries failed and some succeed.
I have experienced weird situations though. The world is full of surpises.