Would you date someone with kids
- Thread starter da_illest101
- Start date
Man....what is up with all these statements implying pregnancy is always the girl's fault....
I think that's part of the reason I like long dating relationships and a couple to be married before they have kids...
Felgen
Well-known member
I didn't say that it was always the girl's fault, but the girl can take ECPs after having unprotected sex. Furthermore, she can choose not to have sex with jerks who will dump her once she gets pregnant.
That's a big part of the problem, though. A girl can't always predict who's going to dump her with the kids. Maybe he acted like the perfect gentleman until he realized he'd have to be a dad and just couldn't handle it.
No birthcontrol is 100%, besides abstinence.
And how is she supposed to know? Guys can be very sweet and convincing when they want to get into your pants....
Felgen
Well-known member
This is one of the main reasons why women reject so-called nice guys (thank God I'm no longer one of them). If a woman dates a man who has been in bed with a three-digit number of other women and the man prefers to eff on the first date, then it's naive to think that the relationship is going to last.
The safety of modern birthcontrols are the main reasons why rape, one night stands and friends with benefits rarely results in a pregnancy in developed countries. On the other hand, one night stands leading to a pregnancy aren't uncommon in South Africa or other developing countries.
Danfalc
Banned
Let's not let this turn into a flame war if we can help it,I know I kinda kicked off some of this debate so I'm not singling anyone out because I have no right too.
But I don't want to have to lock the thread or start deleting messages or giving infractions :
: Can we keep the debate going with a civil tone or even better get back on topic?
But I don't want to have to lock the thread or start deleting messages or giving infractions :
: Can we keep the debate going with a civil tone or even better get back on topic?
fudgy
1
I was about to add my opinion "again" , when I flicked on someones profile and saw they are 22 ...then I realised its not so much ignorance on those parts , but immaturity , no understanding of the real world and the hard facts of life regarding parenthood .
my daughter is not the product of a mistake/ a mis calcualtion/a rubber with a hole in it/a bad choice/a regret or a mishap, and when some of you hold your own child you will know .
my daughter is not the product of a mistake/ a mis calcualtion/a rubber with a hole in it/a bad choice/a regret or a mishap, and when some of you hold your own child you will know .
coyote
Well-known member
Let's not let this turn into a flame war if we can help it,I know I kinda kicked off some of this debate so I'm not singling anyone out because I have no right too.
But I don't want to have to lock the thread or start deleting messages or giving infractions :
Pay close attention to what Dan said everyone!
Felgen
Well-known member
I'm not saying that single mothers are bad mothers (I know plenty that aren't), but the child's father in my home country is required by law to pay child supports.
fudgy
1
felgen my friend they are in brit as well
the child support agency has destroyed many many men and in defense of those men , not least the ones that took their own lives as a result of what the csa did to them in the early days , the men have as bad a time as the women.
personally
my girl is 11....I have had in total ....not one penny !!!
when your up half the night with a poorly child , and no one to turn to , no one to reassure you , no one to take the strain with you , to share your worries or even just give you a hug , then you truly know what loneliness is !!
when you see mum and dads attending the school performances or sports days etc and you once again stand there alone , knowing no one else will ever turn to you and say "I am so proud of OUR child" you have to be everything to your child , mum and dad to make up for for the missing half.
us single mothers and fathers deserve respect,admiration and a fkin medal !!
the child support agency has destroyed many many men and in defense of those men , not least the ones that took their own lives as a result of what the csa did to them in the early days , the men have as bad a time as the women.
personally
my girl is 11....I have had in total ....not one penny !!!
when your up half the night with a poorly child , and no one to turn to , no one to reassure you , no one to take the strain with you , to share your worries or even just give you a hug , then you truly know what loneliness is !!
when you see mum and dads attending the school performances or sports days etc and you once again stand there alone , knowing no one else will ever turn to you and say "I am so proud of OUR child" you have to be everything to your child , mum and dad to make up for for the missing half.
us single mothers and fathers deserve respect,admiration and a fkin medal !!
Are men not required to pay chid support from a one night stand in some places? seems rather silly (and unfair) to me if so.....
Luke1993
Well-known member
If it's proven the child is his, yes he has to pay until the child is 18
Danfalc
Banned
In the Uk,as Luke has already pointed out yes,the guy has to pay child support.Even if it's a one night stand and he doesnt want the kid,his opinion has no bearing on anything.I'm not sure about other places but the law is heavily slanted towards women in regards to Children.
A guy has no decision over what the woman decides to do once pregnant,And I think this is right for the most part as it's the woman who has to nurture it insider her.But it can be sucky if the girl wan't an abortion and the guy would willingly be a single Dad..he has no power to stop her having one.
Same with custody,there have been some heated discussions in politics over equal rights for guys when it comes to seeing their kids.
Yeah I think it's the same in the US. I agree it is sad when a guy wants to be a father and would be a good one but doesn't have any say in the matter of abortion.
In my eyes I cant see how that is right,when a guy doesnt want to be the father he has to pay child support and is seen as a scumbag,but when a women doesnt want to be the mother she can just go and kill it,to me people who abort are lower than dirt.