Why are you depressed at the moment?

Phoenixx

Phoenixx

Well-known member
Just sick of feeling lonely and sick of the panic I feel when I see people or when someone even tries to talk to me. I can't win either way.

And yes, I haven been putting off that counseling appointment because I'm just that scared.

I feel so stupid for being like this, yet I feel like there's nothing I can even do. I don't know why I even bother sometimes.... Or why I'm even here in the first place. (In college, that is.)
 
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lietome

New member
Just everything piling up.. horrible day.

My roommates and program mentors are really nice to me and try to talk to me and stuff but I'm just so awkward that I sense that it makes them feel uncomfortable. My speech comm. prof talked to me about my barely passing grade on an assignment... confrontations really depress me. Mass applying for jobs to fill up my co-op term knowing fully well that I probably won't even land one interview. Realizing that the only 'friends' I have only hang out with me because a) they want to dispense their emotional baggage or b) because I'll do just about anything they ask me to.

Where is the nearest pit? because I think I'll just go bury myself now.
 
ILovePocky

ILovePocky

Well-known member
I've been having a lot of health and family problems. I wish I had a friend or someone to talk to. I feel really stuck and trapped at where I am in life right now. I've been putting it off because it absolutely terrifies me but tomorrow my mom is making the doctors appointment. =/
 
MrJones

MrJones

Well-known member
I can't stand myself. I'm so tired of me I don't know why I can't change, even if I try and I try. Everything is always so wrong in my mind, it just doesn't work and I don't know why. It's all so confusing, I don't seem to understand anything, but I always screw it up, no matter what it is, no matter how important is to me, it's all just so stupid and wrong it all becomes useless like me. It doesn't matter, I can't do it, I can try but I fail, and I try again and again and I can't make anything right. I'm probably exagerating but I'm very weak, other people could be incredibly happy in my situation, but I can't and I wonder how many times I can screw everything again without giving up. I don't want to give up. Everyday is darker and heavier, and I don't know why. It shouldn't be this way.I shouldn't feel this way. I shouldn't be saying this. But I guess it doesn't matter if I make another mistake, now it doesn't matter. Just one more to the list.
 
DeadmanWalking

DeadmanWalking

Well-known member
I'm such a yellow-bellied coward that I can't approach anyone or do anything; my family tells me to get over it like it's nothing and reprimand me when I tell them it's not as easy as they think. I don't like this, if I could be rid of this anxiety that easily, I would've shirked it off long ago. I can't maintain normal friendships and I can't make any friends. I'm scared to talk to the few friends that I do have and, in class, when I speak to people and I think I could make a new friend, the very next day they act like we've never met. I don't think anyone wants to be my friend down here; my family told me that college was supposed to be where everything changed. Well, it has: I went from having few friends to none at all. I'm alone and it hurts; I want to cry, but I can't. I'm too much of a emotionless b***ard to do that. To top it all off, I'm constantly surrounded by people for some reason, which acts as a constant reminder that I have no one. Being this pathetic should be a crime, although, technically, it is, according to society.
 
Insane1

Insane1

Well-known member
I'm too soft.. if I don't toughen up I'll be a chewing gum all my life.
Also I need to be more impulsive if I wanna achieve my many goals. And it's hard to change myself,that's what depresses me atm.
 
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Agent_Violet

Well-known member
I'm incredibly crushed and feel completely rejected. such an awful heavy feeling in my chest right now. i could cry...i want to cry...afraid if I start I won't stop. i just want this terrible feeling to stop.
 
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Agent_Violet

Well-known member
Just saw wedding photos from my half sisters wedding a few years ago...our father was at her wedding.walked her down the aisle,danced the daddy/daughter dance with her.

he didn't even rsvp to my wedding invitation nor did he bother to show up.

nice.
 
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Feathers

Well-known member
Agent_Violet ((Hugz))

If it helps, an ex-roomate of mine was a 'half sister' only too - her dad never paid any child support or anything (even worked in another country so her mum couldn't track him down and get any child support) Turned out the 'star' daughter turned rather spoilt and squeamish, while my roommate was a really vibrant, enthusiastic, wonderful person whom all boys adored, she had a lot of friends and a great partner/bf etc. My roomate could earn her own money and make her own life happen, while her sister waited for it to be brought to her... (if it makes sense?)

Her father not being in her life made her STRONGER.

And I have a strong suspicion it's like that in your case too!!

You never know what's underneath the 'happy pictures' (I've seen 'happy pictures of people who split up less than a month later or so... Or some people may stay together and be miserable... Or may have other problems in their lives too...)

This doesn't justify what your father did, parents can be crazy sometimes... yikes!! if you want mine you'll get tired of him after half a year or less!!
 
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Agent_Violet

Well-known member
Thanks Feathers...I know what you're saying is true..my mind knows it now I'm just struggling to get to the point where the emotional side of me knows it too. Im trying to make peace with it bc I know I'm probably better off without him around.
 
upndwn

upndwn

Well-known member
The girl I'm in love with just can't seem to make up her mind, even though she's admitted she's in love with me to :(

My stupid doctor has forgotten to send an important piece of paper which may cost me my trainee position :mad:

Generally sad because I'm lonely and no one really understands me (EMO moment, sorry everyone ::p:)
 
Phoenixx

Phoenixx

Well-known member
Sick of being lonely. Sick of being afraid. Sick of complaining about how much I'm sick of myself. I'm just so tired of everything, I don't even know what to do anymore. I just feel so lost.
 
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Agent_Violet

Well-known member
Phoenixx said:
Sick of being lonely. Sick of being afraid. Sick of complaining about how much I'm sick of myself. I'm just so tired of everything, I don't even know what to do anymore. I just feel so lost.
Click to expand...

hun you could have plucked that out of my brain directly...this is exactly what has been in my head.

*hugs* it's a lonely,difficult place to be and it feels like it's never going to end. You feel restless and want to do anything but feel this way.


have hope for the fleeting good days and those little bursts of light that happen every so often...
 
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