What if a stranger insults you?

[goblin]

In the aftermath, at least, there's the question of what a rude stranger could possibly know and judge. Small comforts.

 

[jaim38]

Agreed that you should ignore those strangers. After all, you only see them once and will probably never see them again. I once went into a restaurant and sat across from this nasty lady who keeps picking on me. She commented on my weight negatively and talked about how sleepy I look, among other things in addition to the food I order (she called me cheap). When I started eating, she started banging her silverware at me. Her friend told her to stop doing it but she just kept glaring me like she hates me. I swear I dont know this lady, never seen her before, and I honestly dont know what she has against me. I wish I could speak out against her, as in ask her why is she insulting me, but she'll probably deny it and say I'm hearing things. Plus, she's like 2 decades older than me so she'll probably say I don't have the right to talk back at her.

I blamed myself for what happened, and the incident scarred me. Another reason why not to trust people or to like people. But, not everyone is like her. There are many nice people out there. Just be prepared for haters because they will be everywhere. They could hate you for no reason. Just ignore them and take comfort in the fact that you'll never see them again, hopefully. Don't blame yourself - they are the ones with the issue - they are the bullies.

 

[Kiwong]

I'd probably just walk away and seethe about it for a day or so. The nice thing about being big is that this never happens.

It is an advantage of being a large adult male. The target you had on you during adolescence is suddenly gone, and the tables are turned on the bullies. That was my experience.

 

[string3r]

I'm sorry you had to put up with that.

I can relate, in high school kids used to follow me and call me monkey man. It destroyed my trust in humans. I didn't handle it well at the time, it destroyed my self esteem.

Now I am much bigger and uglier, I am more confident in the way I carry myself.

Disgusting, kids can be a bunch of wankers sometimes.

 

[alxbkr]

There are *******s in this world. Don't sweat it it's nothing personal.
Just move on, shrug it off, it doesn't mean anything.
They're just being an *** for the sake of being an ***

 

[Agent_Violet]

It happens rarely.But when it does my reply is always the same "How sad for you that you're stuck being an insecure person...forever." *insert sympathetic head tilt* Then you turn and walk away.

 

[Scandic123]

If a stranger insulted me, I'd try to just ignore it and not give them any attention at all, but I'd probably still be feeling hurt. If a stranger insulted me multiple times I think I'd get angry and say something back. Because when I'm angry, my anxiety is often replaced by that anger. Of course, it also depends on the insult.

 

[Jessquietgirl]

In high school, two girls were talking about me behind my back about how I always wore the same clothes everyday which wasn't exactly true. I had weight issues back then so I found myself comfortable wearing sweaters that would cover up my body. I also got negative comments on how I never straightened my hair since it was red and curly.

 

[jc972]

In high school, two girls were talking about me behind my back about how I always wore the same clothes everyday which wasn't exactly true. I had weight issues back then so I found myself comfortable wearing sweaters that would cover up my body. I also got negative comments on how I never straightened my hair since it was red and curly.

They were probably jealous. Red, curly hair is pretty

 

[worrywort]

I get called a lot of stuff when I run. I respond with anger sometimes.

I do too. How do you handle it? For me it's usually always groups of young kids, showing off infront of each other. One girl said I looked like Winnie the Pooh and they all burst out laughing, and last week some kid threw a big piece of bark at my chest as I ran past. I usually figure it's best to ignore them, but it really infuriates me sometimes.

 

[worrywort]

the great thing about strangers is that they don't know you, and you don't know them

so anything they say about you is obviously about their own issues

and any weight you give to their opinion is obviously about your own issues

try to learn from this

hmm interesting point. I think I agree. I'll try to remember that.

 

[Tuukka40]

Brush it off...

The only time I can recall being randomly insulted was this past December. One kid said, "he is wearing a peacoat" and his friend followed with "what a f*ggot"...I just pretended like I didn't hear it. I might of said something back but I was with my mother so I really didn't want to. I'm not quick with my comebacks either lol.

Honestly, it was a group of a few trashy looking/acting guys....which is pretty low on my list of people to impress. And I feel like 95% of the time that will be the type who feel compelled to insult you out of nowhere. Pretty irrelevant. Just motivates me to be successful and take a crap on them some day. Metaphorically.

 

[Kiwong]

I do too. How do you handle it? For me it's usually always groups of young kids, showing off infront of each other. One girl said I looked like Winnie the Pooh and they all burst out laughing, and last week some kid threw a big piece of bark at my chest as I ran past. I usually figure it's best to ignore them, but it really infuriates me sometimes.

It wears away at me. Currently I have lost motivation to run, and the way the world intrudes on me is part of the reason.

 

[squidgee]

Because I already have a low opinion of myself anyway, I don't get upset easily from insults/racial slurs or whatever. If anything, I agree with the insult in a kind of self-depreciating humorous way. Of course I still actually care about what they say, it's just I try not to dig too deep into it and just try and act all stoic when it does happen.

On the bright side, they're strangers. So chances are you'll never see them again. At least not anytime soon.

 

[SilentAndShy]

I tend to look at them and walk away. I don't think I would respond unless they attacked me physically and I could fight back and say it was self defence. I always think if I respond verbally which I'd have a right to do if they insulted me, I think that'll be pouring gasoline on the fire and it's best to walk away. But also feel these people want a reaction from you.

 

[Lavinialuna]

When I was young I used to silently despise myself when people said rude things. Now that I am older, I would stick up for myself, but it would still hurt just as much.
The worst part is that I would ruminate about it for a long time. sometimes hours, sometimes days. Sometimes it would come back up next time I feel bad about myself. I make myself so mad! It takes me so long to process such things that socializing at all is torture, if not while I am doing it, later while I pick over the conversation...But no one deserves to be spoken to like that. Hope you are feeling better about it.

 

[savagewisdom]

What would you do if a stranger said something rude about you. A couple of years ago, I was walking back home form a store. I walked past a group of three guys. one of them looked at me and said that I walk like I have something stuck up my rear. then they all laughed. I almost had a panic attack.

One time as I was walking home in a blizzard with groceries, a trunk drove by and a guy popped his head out of the passenger window and yelled, "Congratulations you made it to Hollywood!".
I've decided the next time I happen to be in a situation where a stranger insults me, I'm going to remain calm and say, "I'm sorry you're not happy."
Because you know, obviously people who take the time to make fun of others aren't very happy with themselves or their lives.

 

[spider04]

I usually would ignore, to avoid any problems.

 

[R3K]

I was walking in the mall to meet my dad super early in the morning and was tired as hell. i slowed down to look inside a café to see what they served, and not realizing some girl was following me from behind, she stepped on my heel and said "move!" I jumped out of the way instinctively, then as she was walking away something inside told me to say something, so I said: "watch yourself bitch." I was surprised at myself for saying something... I don't think she quite heard it cause I said it kinda low, but I know she knows I replied and that makes me feel better.

another night I was at a karaoke place with my coworkers. I went to the bathroom and someone started banging on the door the second I stepped in and was yelling "hurry up bitch" over and over. washing my hands I felt like I should say something back, because if I stepped out without saying anything i'd look like a tool. so I shouted "five dollars to use this bathroom!" he kept knocking and i opened the door with my shoulders squared up to him ready for anything. he was holding a cocktail of somesort and muttered "that's right btich" with lazy *** eyes. i sneered at him and said "now it's ten dollars buddy." then i walked past him and nothing else ensued.

it shames me to learn that i am capable of going into "*******" mode to trade blows with random aholes and bullies. but, if i do nothing every time and just take the abuse then i'll never respect myself. so i say if a stranger insults you, you should reply in some way.

 

[Opaline]

I was walking in the mall to meet my dad super early in the morning and was tired as hell. i slowed down to look inside a café to see what they served, and not realizing some girl was following me from behind, she stepped on my heel and said "move!" I jumped out of the way instinctively, then as she was walking away something inside told me to say something, so I said: "watch yourself bitch." I was surprised at myself for saying something... I don't think she quite heard it cause I said it kinda low, but I know she knows I replied and that makes me feel better.

another night I was at a karaoke place with my coworkers. I went to the bathroom and someone started banging on the door the second I stepped in and was yelling "hurry up bitch" over and over. washing my hands I felt like I should say something back, because if I stepped out without saying anything i'd look like a tool. so I shouted "five dollars to use this bathroom!" he kept knocking and i opened the door with my shoulders squared up to him ready for anything. he was holding a cocktail of somesort and muttered "that's right btich" with lazy *** eyes. i sneered at him and said "now it's ten dollars buddy." then i walked past him and nothing else ensued.

it shames me to learn that i am capable of going into "*******" mode to trade blows with random aholes and bullies. but, if i do nothing every time and just take the abuse then i'll never respect myself. so i say if a stranger insults you, you should reply in some way.

Maybe some people would consider this stooping to their level, but many times I do the same thing. I believe in treating people kindly as long as they aren't rude to you. I would rather just be assertive without insulting anyone or anything, but sometimes my anger or anxiety gets the better of me. Sometimes I come off as bitchy when I'm really trying to be assertive because my nervousness makes me overreact with more hostility or attitude than intended (if I manage to say anything at all).