What does being hugged feel like??

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Flanscho said:
I loooooove hugs and hugging. Luckily, my closer friends like it too. There are lots of different hugs of course. I hug about all female friends I meet, but only a few of the male ones (with the other males I shake hands or just say "hi"). We hug when we meet and when we leave each other.

With some friends, I have long intense hugs. Like, not just for a second, but where you embrace each other, to show that you care, that it's not a formality, but that you do that because you want to and are happy to meet that person.
Others I hug tightly too, but only for a few seconds. And others, I just hug as a more closer form of shaking hands.

I like it. I love hugging and cuddling.
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How does it make you feel when you're having a long hug? Do you feel loved? I sometimes try to imagine what it feels like when I see a parent really lovingly embrace their child for a long time, or especially when a couple hold each other on television or something. I try to imagine I'm that person. I think maybe I've failed to achieve a casual small hug probably because I'm real tensed up about it.
 
Flanscho

Flanscho

Well-known member
Articulate said:
How does it make you feel when you're having a long hug? Do you feel loved? I sometimes try to imagine what it feels like when I see a parent really lovingly embrace their child for a long time, or especially when a couple hold each other on television or something. I try to imagine I'm that person. I think maybe I've failed to achieve a casual small hug probably because I'm real tensed up about it.
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Loved? If it's hugging ones partner, then yes. I normally don't hug my family. Not sure why. Hugging or getting hugged by friends? No, it's not love. It just means that we are happy about each others existence, the friendship, that we meet in that moment, and that we care for each other.

What you should do about it? I don't really know. It depends on the society you live in. My circle of friends might be different than the one of my coworker, and certainly different than those in your country.

I don't hug random people either, unless they offer a hug, and I like them on the first glance. Otherwise it's just a thing that comes with time. The more often I meet a person, the more we like each other, the more likely we are to hug.

Hugging a partner comes naturally of course. I don't think that a relationship, unless it's maybe going on for 50 years or so already, is working, if people don't hug.
 
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hardy said:
I wish i could tell...i sometimes wish to be cuddled by a loving person...may be i don't deserve it right now.
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Have you never been hugged either? I don't knowwhether it's wise for me to tell someone if I met them that they would be my first hug. It might scare them off.
 
truffleshuffle

truffleshuffle

Well-known member
Articulate said:
Have you never been hugged either? I don't knowwhether it's wise for me to tell someone if I met them that they would be my first hug. It might scare them off.
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I will say that never having a hug is a bit strange unless you have a aversion to being touched/hugged but They might think it weird but I don;t think you would scare them off. They would probably want to hug you more than run off and it would probably open up a conversation with that person more than anything.
 
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laure15

Well-known member
Before you go out and hug people, you should start by hugging stuffed animals, pets, and the like, just for practice. And maybe hug yourself. Afterwards, you can try hugging people.
 
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truffleshuffle said:
I will say that never having a hug is a bit strange unless you have a aversion to being touched/hugged but They might think it weird but I don;t think you would scare them off. They would probably want to hug you more than run off and it would probably open up a conversation with that person more than anything.
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Well I was like I said held when a baby/infant so that maybe counts as a hug? I've also been patted on the back and on the shoulder by: parents, colleagues and some students. I've also patted people on the back, and put my arm on someone's shoulder for a graduation photo.

I would say that over the years I've developed a sort of aversion to touch. I'm deeply frustrated about it because I don't believe it's the real me. I suppose it's a complex I've developed over the years. Certain parts of my body cause me terrible discomfort if touched by accident. However, I'm not 'aversive to touch', I deeply crave a loving touch from someone ideally a girl. I also did certain types of exercise years ago which aren't suggestive of someone being aversive to touch.

I would like to tell a girl that no one has ever put their arms around me, but am fearful it would be something of a pity gesture. Also though it's sad I do hug my dog, and I suppose I'm so tactile with him because I'm not shown any affection by other people. Maybe that counts as practice.
 
miserablecow

miserablecow

Well-known member
I've always felt uncomfortable giving and receiving hugs. Its something I rarely do. The past few years I have been returning hugs from my close friends, but still I feel uncomfortable.When I see couples or married couples hugging etc I do long that. Maybe. Its because I've never had a boyfriend/partner.
To me hugs feel warm and I feel safe, but that's when I've hugged my mother.
 
takeheart

takeheart

Well-known member
I think you are overreacting here, surely you have been hugged before! even I have been hugged before
 
Pookah

Pookah

Well-known member
I feel awkward hugging most people but not my husband, I want to hug him all the time. So I am sure you will like it when you find a person you are comfortable being affectionate with.

Hugging my partner feels warm and safe. Its like climbing into your bed with the fresh, soft linens and burrowing into it to sleep. A kind touch whether gentle or firm sends very nice signals throughout the body. It is blissful.

I hope it doesn't distress you to hear about them, even though you asked.
 
Daniel089

Daniel089

Well-known member
I sort of dated a girl in summer. Touching her, hugging her, resting my head on her lap was a whole new experience to me, when you just forget everything else in your world at that moment...
 
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