What do you hate most about social anxiety?

[MrJones]

Having nothing to do.
Having no friends.
^Not being able to have fun b/c of the lack of those two.
Not being able to get things done that I need done.

Let me join your group ::

 

[vexatiousmind]

Let me join your group ::

Its not a fun one::

 

[MrJones]

Its not a fun one::

I know, but at least we're not alone

 

[MrTimid&Shy]

all of them really, but the most would be being misunderstood by others (people thinking ur rude, etc)

 

[ANNomaly]

It's a close match between not being able to express myself, not being able to make as well as maintain relationships, and feeling self-conscious. I'd like to be able to express myself to friends, but, on top of being insecure, I have an intense fear of being vulnerable.

 

[takethislife]

You should've put this a multiple choice poll IMO but if i have to choose i say being misunderstood by others. Everything kinda derives from that.

 

[BlueDays]

If I had to choose, it would be being misunderstood by others.
People are so judgemental as it is, when you see that they have misunderstood your behaviour it only makes the whole mess twice as hard to bear.::

 

[T T T]

Feeling self conscious (having low self esteem or negative thoughts and insecurities).

This in my opinion is the main contributor to the problems of SA.

 

[IwantToCureMyself]

I hate most that feeling in the middle of me (somewhere where is heart, do you get me?) before the social event. I hate it so much, sometimes I can't concentrate on my work because of that. I got all sweaty and sometimes have diarrhoea.

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

If only there were an "All of the Above" option on the poll. I would have to say that being misunderstood is the hardest part for me. I'm pretty good at reading other people but never judge them until I have a good sense of who they are and what lies within their soul. Shame the same thing can't be said about most other people ::

 

[upndwn]

I answered: feeling self conscious, having low self esteem or negative thoughts and insecurities, but the last one (feeling lonely and helpless) is also really relevant. I have mostly learned to cope with the other stuff through years of medication, treatment and social adaptation. After I started with my new meds about a year ago I have only had a couple of mild anxiety attacks.

My heart goes out to all you people struggling with SA, although I'm not completely cured, I am living proof that there is hope and you can get better. It only takes a long time and a lot of dedication.

 

[Phoenixx]

I wish there was an "all of the above" option too. But overall, I think it really comes down to a tie between not being able to express myself and being misunderstood. (I chose the latter on the poll)

 

[Blinkers]

Also put me down for all of the above...

I especially hate it when I'm going through a really bad patch and I'm sure my husband is thinking "What the hell did I ever see in this crazy loser". I know I'm very lucky to have him but sometimes I can't help but feel that he'd rather be with someone else anywhere else

 

[ScaredToBreathe]

If only there were an "All of the Above" option on the poll. I would have to say that being misunderstood is the hardest part for me. I'm pretty good at reading other people but never judge them until I have a good sense of who they are and what lies within their soul. Shame the same thing can't be said about most other people ::

i know a lot of people would have said "all of the above" if i gave that option, because those were all extreme factors that deeply affect people with SA. the point was to isolate one factor which people found the most difficult to deal with, although i know all of them are very difficult.

i also say being misunderstood is one of the hardest parts. i'm sure a lot of people think i'm stupid, rude, stuck-up, antisocial or shy, when that's not really the case. and i can't explain to them about my SA because i get so anxious i can't talk, so people just think worse about me.

 

[PerseverareJasmine]

For me what I hate the most is a combination of not being able to openly express myself and feeling misunderstood because of it. I have difficulty letting people get to know me or get close to me. Its as if something inside me shuts down and I lock up when I feel that someone is trying to become close to me, and its kept me from developing potential relationships and friendships. Sometimes I can sense that many people feel as if they are "getting nowhere" when they try to break my shell, so they give up. I've been working on trying to improve, and I can only hope that I can get better at letting my guard down and maybe meeting some people that I can let connect to me.

 

[Froggy246]

For me what I hate the most is a combination of not being able to openly express myself and feeling misunderstood because of it. I have difficulty letting people get to know me or get close to me. Its as if something inside me shuts down and I lock up when I feel that someone is trying to become close to me, and its kept me from developing potential relationships and friendships. Sometimes I can sense that many people feel as if they are "getting nowhere" when they try to break my shell, so they give up. I've been working on trying to improve, and I can only hope that I can get better at letting my guard down and maybe meeting some people that I can let connect to me.

Yea I know what you mean there. Thinking about work situations in particular, I actually start off pretty well, I'm ok with the initial stages but I can't get past a certain point, it's like I've spent all my social coins and so I'll start avoiding the person to some degree to try and preserve those good first impressions. I do get a bit paranoid that people might think to themselves, or say to each other 's*** she's been working here for 2 years and we still don't know her', and at worst that I make them feel uncomfortable.
In general I've always relied on special/magical connections, connections that are so strong even I can't get in the way of them, but they are few and far between, especially the older I get.

 

[Hoger]

I hate being afraid to put my point of view and not having the courage to enter into a discussion. I hate to be submissive.

 

[SmileMore]

Not being able to show the real me.

 

[Silatuyok]

Mostly I just wish that I could attract/maintain a few close friendships. Someone to call up when I need to bitch about something.

 

[SmileMore]

Loneliness.