So hard to take compliments

[Agent_Violet]

Why do you think it's hard for many of us to accept a compliment?

I personally have trouble just accepting it as how the person really feels without that annoying inner voice saying, "they're just being nice." or "they just want something from you so they're being nice."

It's SO hard to simply say Thank you and truly accept that the person meant what they said.

I have a few theories on why it's hard for me. I think bc I have been programmed to think accepting a compliment and believing it is being cocky or conceited I'd rather deny the compliment and say the person saying it has ulterior motives. "they couldn't POSSIBLY think these good things about ME!"

If you have trouble accepting praise...why do you think you're like that?

 

[lilmutegirl]

I agree with your thoughts about believing that people are just being nice or want something.
I've also wondered (on numerous occasions) if people give fake "compliments" as a way of mocking me. Seeing the movie "Mean Girls" highlights how this can play out. I don't want to look stupid by accepting a compliment intended to make fun of me.

 

[lilmutegirl]

I also have a lot of trouble accepting when people thank me (like, my boss thanks me a lot at work for going the extra mile). I tend to just say, "no problem" or "you're welcome" and it feels awkward, but I don't know what else to say.

 

[Agent_Violet]

I also have a lot of trouble accepting when people thank me (like, my boss thanks me a lot at work for going the extra mile). I tend to just say, "no problem" or "you're welcome" and it feels awkward, but I don't know what else to say.

I blush lol

i don't know why but i feel put on the spot when someone goes out of their way to thank me or compliment me. even if I deserve the gratitude.

I get SO redfaced when someone pays attention to me. it's super awkward.

 

[PhillyFlyersGrl]

For me it actually makes me feel bashful when I'm complimented. I like it, but if someone goes on and on..I start feeling like oh..I want to hide. It's an emotional and intimate thing to be complimented. Its hard for me to look the person in the eye too.

 

[Rembrandt Broam]

I think it's possibly related to how we see ourselves. If we don't have a high opinion of ourselves, then it's difficult to accept that others might find something about us to genuinely compliment, so we either don't accept the compliment as genuine or start to look for ulterior motives.

 

[Phoenixx]

I really don't know why it's sometimes so hard for me to take compliments. Maybe it's because I have very low self-esteem so I don't believe them even if I told myself either?

The certain compliments I usually can't accept is when someone tells me I'm "pretty," "beautiful," (only gotten that one a couple times) "cute," anything having to do with my looks. I don't get those compliments too often either. It's something I sometimes would kill to hear, but then when I get a compliment like that I don't believe it and figure they person is lying or mocking me. It doesn't make any sense. I really hate that I react like I do. I get all uneasy and uncomfortable and can't even look the person in the eye. The first time my friend said, "You're so beautiful!" it completely caught me off guard and all I could say was, "Um... okay." *facepalm* I couldn't even accept it, couldn't even say "Thanks" or anything. I felt awful.

 

[MrSunday]

I rarely get compliments. When I do, I just smile and say thank you.

 

[InvisaLady]

I don't know, I've never received any.

 

[MikeyC]

I personally have trouble just accepting it as how the person really feels without that annoying inner voice saying, "they're just being nice." or "they just want something from you so they're being nice."

Yes, I feel the same way.

I have had compliments in the past, but I always tend to brush them off and I know that I don't really accept them. It would be nice to realise they're being genuine, but my pessimistic/depressed side always inhibits that.

I still like hearing them, though.

 

[Srijita52]

Yes, I feel the same way.

I have had compliments in the past, but I always tend to brush them off and I know that I don't really accept them. It would be nice to realise they're being genuine, but my pessimistic/depressed side always inhibits that.

I still like hearing them, though.

Same here. Also its very hard to convince myself sometimes that I'm actually worthy of any compliments. But if I compliment someone else, I mean it though.

 

[Graeme1988]

I think it's because I tend to brush off most compliments I get, even geniune ones. I also have a tendency to question it - like what did I do deserve that compliment? Ya know what I mean? Then, on the other hand, I constantly put myself down - telling myself I'm not worthy of praise. But then that is my dark/depressive/self-loathing side.

 

[Valhalla]

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[psych]

I learned to simply say thank you when I get a compliment.
People are giving you something nice, whether the compliment is true or not... They are telling you that to be nice &/or make you feel good, so I just accept it.

 

[WeirdyMcGee]

It doesn't really phase me.
I think that subconsciously I feel I know they are lying; and I would rather believe that I'm hideous and stupid rather than think for a second that kind words are true.

So, I say thankyou and continue along with my day as if nothing happened.

... try not to be offended.

 

[Meggy0001]

I think that they are mocking me and that there is no way they really think that about me, and if I don't believe then I have it in my head that no one else can :/ and just incase htey are mocking me it's better to argue that I am not than me saying think you and then them saying I was kidding lol yeah I am paranoid like that. I also do say no I am not or whatever because I don't want to seem conceited XD

 

[coyote]

just for the record...

if i ever compliment anyone, it's meant in earnest sincerity

i have no reason to make stuff up to be nice

it would be easier to just say nothing

if i say it, it's because i mean it

and i'm not the only one

i'm pretty sure...

 

[Kiwong]

I have trouble giving compliments

 

[MikeyC]

I learned to simply say thank you when I get a compliment.
People are giving you something nice, whether the compliment is true or not... They are telling you that to be nice &/or make you feel good, so I just accept it.

"Don't look a gift horse in the mouth," as the saying goes.

I would rather believe that I'm hideous and stupid rather than think for a second that kind words are true.

But you're not hideous or stupid, and I reckon all the compliments you get are true. The ones I give you certainly are.

Oops, there I go complimenting you again.

 

[chibiXphantom]

i tend to take compliments as the way parents talk to their little kids when they draw a scribble and say its a puppy. in other words, i assume i did horribly and theyre just lying and being nice cause they dont want me to feel bad.

like i sang a solo on stage at a show. i saw the recording and know i sounded like a squeaky 9 year old little girl singing. i know i did horribly, yet everyone said im such a good singer.