Post your random thoughts/feelings etc

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
How d'ye stop anxiety and negative thoughts from holding you back from doing something? I'm starting to get really annoyed at myself that ah can't just push it. πŸ˜”πŸ˜Ÿ

Like, I shouldn't be this nervous about leaving a WhatsApp voice memo for a fellow musician that I'm going to be writing a song with.
 
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theoutsider

Well-known member
I keep wearing a mask even though I don't have to now.

AlarmingScentedAoudad-size_restricted.gif
I'm honestly kind of at a loss where that's concerned. I've been vaccinated fully but where I am there's still partial mask mandates depending on where you go. I still wear mine everywhere but have recently started pulling it down under my nose at times when there's nobody around. I feel like people are still frowning on those who aren't wearing one, thinking we're being inconsiderate or rebellious. I guess when the partial mandate is lifted, I'll finally ditch the thing altogether.
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
How d'ye stop anxiety and negative thoughts from holding you back from doing something? I'm starting to get really annoyed at myself that ah can't just push it. πŸ˜”πŸ˜Ÿ

Like, I shouldn't be this nervous about leaving a WhatsApp voice memo for a fellow musician that I'm going to be writing a song with
Right! I'm just going to have to get this done. Nae real choice, really. Otherwise, my WhatsApp media is going to 90% made up of voice memos that this singer has left me in the last week. 5% concert photos and the last 5% being family photos and videos.

So, my anxiety and negative thoughts can "git tae f_ck!" πŸ˜ πŸ–•
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
My oldest sister has suggested that I learn how to sing. Learning how to sing when you don't even have a great deal of β€” if any β€” confidence in your own speaking voice, is that even possible? :unsure:
 

Sammie_Kay

Well-known member
How d'ye stop anxiety and negative thoughts from holding you back from doing something? I'm starting to get really annoyed at myself that ah can't just push it. πŸ˜”πŸ˜Ÿ

Like, I shouldn't be this nervous about leaving a WhatsApp voice memo for a fellow musician that I'm going to be writing a song with.
I struggle real hard from this. I don't like the feeling of when I give in and let my anxiety and negative thoughts win( at the time I feel like if i just let them win then it will be over and easy) But it never is and I always beat myself up about it. I have been starting to keep a list of the things that were giving me these bad feelings and I write down what I did and what happened after. I celebrate the little things. Like today I wanted to go to a grocery store after work, I usually talk myself outta it but today I went and I walked around the whole store and shopped. I felt a little nervous and my anxiety started to pop up but instead of me running away I told myself look at how good your doing and tried to make it a little goal to go around the whole store. After I asked myself was that so bad. It wasn't and hopefully next time I will remember to tell any of my anxiety feelings to shut up

Good Luck with the voice memo! I would be nervous as well! Just go for it. Maybe right down some key points on what you want to say!
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
I struggle real hard from this. I don't like the feeling of when I give in and let my anxiety and negative thoughts win( at the time I feel like if i just let them win then it will be over and easy) But it never is and I always beat myself up about it. I have been starting to keep a list of the things that were giving me these bad feelings and I write down what I did and what happened after. I celebrate the little things. Like today I wanted to go to a grocery store after work, I usually talk myself outta it but today I went and I walked around the whole store and shopped. I felt a little nervous and my anxiety started to pop up but instead of me running away I told myself look at how good your doing and tried to make it a little goal to go around the whole store. After I asked myself was that so bad. It wasn't and hopefully next time I will remember to tell any of my anxiety feelings to shut up
Yeah, I tend to let anxiety talk me outta doing stuff that I want to do
Good Luck with the voice memo! I would be nervous as well! Just go for it. Maybe right down some key points on what you want to say!
Thanks for the advice, but I'm not sure where it's best to start as far as writing down the key points? Mainly because I've got a lot of information that I need to convey in this voice memo, and convey clearly. As well as respond to a few things that the singer say and asked me in her previous voice memos to me.
You could watch some videos on voice lessons and run some scales to see how it goes. Do you want to start singing?
Can't really decide. I mean, singing would help me learning some of my favourite songs on guitar by ear, if I were able to sing the notes and be on pitch.
 
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Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Good Luck with the voice memo! I would be nervous as well! Just go for it. Maybe right down some key points on what you want to say!
Okay... just took this advice, and wrote out the key points for the voice memo I need to send, with prompts in brackets next each key points to make sure I remember what to reference, and lose my train of thought. There's 9 key points in total, with the prompts making up an additional 11 things I mustn't forget reference or ask about. 😨
 

Phoenixx

Well-known member
I really don't know what's been up with people lately. Or maybe it's just me being sensitive. I don't know. All I know is that I'm tired of people's attitudes these last two weeks, but instead of lashing out like I want to I'm trying really hard to let it go. I'm finding myself drowning in a victim mentality recently and I really hate it. Like, why in the world should I care that other people are deciding not to like me or want to treat me like shit? That's their problem. Not everyone is going to like me, but the least they could do is actually give me simple respect. That's not too much to ask, but then again that might be too much for someone else to provide. And again, that's not my problem. Their misery shouldn't become my misery. I'm uptight enough, I don't need to add to my own pessimism.

It's so dumb to even worry about this crap right now. Hell, it's Friday. I have a 3-day weekend ahead of me with actually nice weather for once, albeit HOT, and at least one big project will be finished by tomorrow so I don't have to worry about it. Next week's paycheck from my work hours this week will be a very decent one, so that will put me even closer to paying off my student loans. Today I have to leave early because I have a dentist appointment, but then I plan on treating myself and ruining my teeth cleaning with some fast food for lunch. :LOL: I just hope I get out of my appointment on time since I have to also be at work an hour earlier than usual to cover someone's end of shift.
 

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
I really don't know what's been up with people lately. Or maybe it's just me being sensitive. I don't know. All I know is that I'm tired of people's attitudes these last two weeks, but instead of lashing out like I want to I'm trying really hard to let it go. I'm finding myself drowning in a victim mentality recently and I really hate it. Like, why in the world should I care that other people are deciding not to like me or want to treat me like shit? That's their problem. Not everyone is going to like me, but the least they could do is actually give me simple respect. That's not too much to ask, but then again that might be too much for someone else to provide. And again, that's not my problem. Their misery shouldn't become my misery. I'm uptight enough, I don't need to add to my own pessimism.
I can SO relate to you here Phoenixx.. It's a constant battle for me. I mean, I know I shouldn't let my attention be focused on peoples negative BS but damn... there's just so much out there it's hard to avoid. I really try to keep my mindset on a different track because I know it gets me down and I just don't like thinking negatively, it takes too much mental energy from me. It's hard to do constantly.
 

F0AM

Well-known member
I really don't know what's been up with people lately. Or maybe it's just me being sensitive. I don't know. All I know is that I'm tired of people's attitudes these last two weeks, but instead of lashing out like I want to I'm trying really hard to let it go. I'm finding myself drowning in a victim mentality recently and I really hate it. Like, why in the world should I care that other people are deciding not to like me or want to treat me like shit? That's their problem. Not everyone is going to like me, but the least they could do is actually give me simple respect. That's not too much to ask, but then again that might be too much for someone else to provide. And again, that's not my problem. Their misery shouldn't become my misery. I'm uptight enough, I don't need to add to my own pessimism.

It's so dumb to even worry about this crap right now. Hell, it's Friday. I have a 3-day weekend ahead of me with actually nice weather for once, albeit HOT, and at least one big project will be finished by tomorrow so I don't have to worry about it. Next week's paycheck from my work hours this week will be a very decent one, so that will put me even closer to paying off my student loans. Today I have to leave early because I have a dentist appointment, but then I plan on treating myself and ruining my teeth cleaning with some fast food for lunch. :LOL: I just hope I get out of my appointment on time since I have to also be at work an hour earlier than usual to cover someone's end of shift.

Jerks can be like a burnt popcorn, a few of them can ruin the whole lot even if all of the rest aren't burnt. Even if there are reasons to be happy, these events prevail 😩

If you can't get rid of them, you can try to select an hour (whichever you prefer) to think about all this and after that you can't until that hour of the next day. I did that in situations like when I was overanxious about a surgery or when someone very dear to me treated me not in the best possible way.

Can also try to write every worry that comes to your head down a paper, and forget about it later when you feel you're done with everything else. Its a way to help the brain, appeasing your need to worry about it while at the same time not letting it get the best of you or ruining your day.

AND obviously, you can also post it here and vent while interacting with others πŸ˜ƒ
I can SO relate to you here Phoenixx.. It's a constant battle for me. I mean, I know I shouldn't let my attention be focused on peoples negative BS but damn... there's just so much out there it's hard to avoid. I really try to keep my mindset on a different track because I know it gets me down and I just don't like thinking negatively, it takes too much mental energy from me. It's hard to do constantly.

It really takes A LOT of energy to overthink stuff. Even more if we talk about "circular thoughts" which never come to a conclusion and are a neverending energy burning.

It's very hard to ignore others' attitude all the time due to our social (even if little) nature.

And there are times when is better to just face/confront some of those jerks 🀣. But always depends on the situation and if the outcome will be positive to you.
 

Phoenixx

Well-known member
Jerks can be like a burnt popcorn, a few of them can ruin the whole lot even if all of the rest aren't burnt. Even if there are reasons to be happy, these events prevail 😩

If you can't get rid of them, you can try to select an hour (whichever you prefer) to think about all this and after that you can't until that hour of the next day. I did that in situations like when I was overanxious about a surgery or when someone very dear to me treated me not in the best possible way.

Can also try to write every worry that comes to your head down a paper, and forget about it later when you feel you're done with everything else. Its a way to help the brain, appeasing your need to worry about it while at the same time not letting it get the best of you or ruining your day.

AND obviously, you can also post it here and vent while interacting with others πŸ˜ƒ
I really should try that, designating a time slot for my thoughts and train my brain to only think about that thing at that time and that time only. My anxiety has really been running rampant during the week due to lack of sleep and feeling burnt out. It sucks. BUT the weighted blanket I ordered came in today, as well as earplugs, so I'm honestly excited to try it out and see if it'll help me stay asleep.
 

Phoenixx

Well-known member
Ever wonder why you react a certain way or have so much god damn anxiety about particular things, but actual "normal" people don't and then you continue to have anxiety about your anxiety and what the heck is actually wrong with you? Yep. Kinda had a *ding ding ding* moment today after being able to actually take a breather, get some stuff done that I wanted to, and have a clear head. Just about 60% of all my anxiety about certain things all still stems down to my mother. I mean, I knew that, but I didn't know that. Does that even make sense? Am I even making sense right now? Probably not. But anywho, I basically reminded myself today, "Hey, now that you have a set schedule for work, maybe you can look into actually finding a decent therapist that actually listens and go back to therapy. And you know, actually address the real reasons why you have all this anxiety in the first place and not have the therapist have to actually play 20 questions to figure it out."

I've noticed the more I see and talk to my mother, the worse my anxiety is. This week between PMS, just having a very full plate to deal with, and then talking to my mother and having her help me with things honestly sent me into such a psychotic freaking tailspin. I like that she helps, but help never comes from just helping with her. I hate admitting that but it's true. It's always an IOU with her. It's always a "I'll do this thing for you but I'm going to do it my way and make passive comments the whole time too."

One of the things I get *extremely* anxious about -- and makes me wonder if I now am borderline OCD -- is the state of my house. How it looks, how it feels, how it smells, how clean it is. I didn't grow up in a clean house. I grew up in a run down clutterfest of a house. Both of my parents are hoarders. No where near as bad as from that TV show Hoarders, but it's still worse than average. Even though I would have friends over as a kid, as I got older I started feeling embarrassed how my parents kept things and quit inviting people over. Piles upon piles of books and papers stacked from the floor and in bins and on tables. Storage boxes full of old stuff thrown upstairs in rooms you couldn't even access because there was so much. Random stuff placed in random places. Dust coating the surfaces of things and no one doing a thing about it. Having to help clean wasn't just a chore, it was literal torture. It was getting yelled at for not doing enough, it was getting judged over how I did things, it was cleaning something only to have it messed up the very next day therefore no point in actually doing the work. When things broke, they never got fixed. They stayed broken, and to this day there are still things in their house that have been broken since I was a kid.

Nowadays, I absolutely hate clutter in my house. I spring clean 2 - 3 times a year. I'm always getting rid of stuff, and I don't usually replace it either. I can't stand looking at mismatching colors or random stuff in a room, things need to complement each other. I cannot stand things out of place or tilted. Broken things I usually want fixed ASAP, otherwise it drives me nuts because I keep looking at it whenever I walk into that room. This also explains why I get so god damn anxious if I'm home too much as well. I love my home, but by god does it need a whole cosmetic makeover. It's a wonderful blank slate that's itching to be worked with, but things just haven't gotten done due to other stuff in life happening. I still have white walls, I still have wood floors that need to be repaired, I have a bathroom that's currently falling apart that desperately needs a whole makeover. But the whole point of this long enough post is, I'm always obsessing over these things and I don't want to obsess over it so much anymore. My house isn't my parents house. My house is still far better than the crapshoot I grew up in. But I feel like my brain doesn't recognize that, or is afraid that my house is going to turn into my parents house. And I really don't know how to change the way my brain sees these things.
 

vj288

not actually Fiona Apple
I didn't grow up in a clean house. I grew up in a run down clutterfest of a house. Both of my parents are hoarders. No where near as bad as from that TV show Hoarders, but it's still worse than average. Even though I would have friends over as a kid, as I got older I started feeling embarrassed how my parents kept things and quit inviting people over. Piles upon piles of books and papers stacked from the floor and in bins and on tables. Storage boxes full of old stuff thrown upstairs in rooms you couldn't even access because there was so much. Random stuff placed in random places. Dust coating the surfaces of things and no one doing a thing about it. Having to help clean wasn't just a chore, it was literal torture. It was getting yelled at for not doing enough, it was getting judged over how I did things, it was cleaning something only to have it messed up the very next day therefore no point in actually doing the work. When things broke, they never got fixed. They stayed broken, and to this day there are still things in their house that have been broken since I was a kid.

That is nearly exactly the same house situation I had growing up, except I wouldn't say helping clean was torture because...there was unlikely ever to be two people cleaning at the same time. It did feel hopeless to try to make things better around the house though, as like you the next day it'd be back the way it was before. I've found myself to be a neat freak when it comes to certain things now, and my sister as well. I wonder if it's a common reaction to living in a cluttered, messy, and dirty house growing up to swing the opposite direction and become anal and particular about things instead.
 

MollyBeGood

Well-known member
I've been looking at kayaks, they seem like a fun excuse to brave the outside world. It'd be great if Gus would come along. I can see us having a ball at the local lake.
Some of the best times of my life have been spent with my doggy friends in a boat on the river-in my 20’s I was always on the river. So much fun! Get a kayak! We had a bigger boat that could hold gear and camping supplies which was really nice. Love river camping with the pooches.
 

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Ever wonder why you react a certain way or have so much god damn anxiety about particular things, but actual "normal" people don't and then you continue to have anxiety about your anxiety and what the heck is actually wrong with you? Yep. Kinda had a *ding ding ding* moment today after being able to actually take a breather, get some stuff done that I wanted to, and have a clear head. Just about 60% of all my anxiety about certain things all still stems down to my mother. I mean, I knew that, but I didn't know that. Does that even make sense? Am I even making sense right now? Probably not. But anywho, I basically reminded myself today, "Hey, now that you have a set schedule for work, maybe you can look into actually finding a decent therapist that actually listens and go back to therapy. And you know, actually address the real reasons why you have all this anxiety in the first place and not have the therapist have to actually play 20 questions to figure it out."

I've noticed the more I see and talk to my mother, the worse my anxiety is. This week between PMS, just having a very full plate to deal with, and then talking to my mother and having her help me with things honestly sent me into such a psychotic freaking tailspin. I like that she helps, but help never comes from just helping with her. I hate admitting that but it's true. It's always an IOU with her. It's always a "I'll do this thing for you but I'm going to do it my way and make passive comments the whole time too."

One of the things I get *extremely* anxious about -- and makes me wonder if I now am borderline OCD -- is the state of my house. How it looks, how it feels, how it smells, how clean it is. I didn't grow up in a clean house. I grew up in a run down clutterfest of a house. Both of my parents are hoarders. No where near as bad as from that TV show Hoarders, but it's still worse than average. Even though I would have friends over as a kid, as I got older I started feeling embarrassed how my parents kept things and quit inviting people over. Piles upon piles of books and papers stacked from the floor and in bins and on tables. Storage boxes full of old stuff thrown upstairs in rooms you couldn't even access because there was so much. Random stuff placed in random places. Dust coating the surfaces of things and no one doing a thing about it. Having to help clean wasn't just a chore, it was literal torture. It was getting yelled at for not doing enough, it was getting judged over how I did things, it was cleaning something only to have it messed up the very next day therefore no point in actually doing the work. When things broke, they never got fixed. They stayed broken, and to this day there are still things in their house that have been broken since I was a kid.

Nowadays, I absolutely hate clutter in my house. I spring clean 2 - 3 times a year. I'm always getting rid of stuff, and I don't usually replace it either. I can't stand looking at mismatching colors or random stuff in a room, things need to complement each other. I cannot stand things out of place or tilted. Broken things I usually want fixed ASAP, otherwise it drives me nuts because I keep looking at it whenever I walk into that room. This also explains why I get so god damn anxious if I'm home too much as well. I love my home, but by god does it need a whole cosmetic makeover. It's a wonderful blank slate that's itching to be worked with, but things just haven't gotten done due to other stuff in life happening. I still have white walls, I still have wood floors that need to be repaired, I have a bathroom that's currently falling apart that desperately needs a whole makeover. But the whole point of this long enough post is, I'm always obsessing over these things and I don't want to obsess over it so much anymore. My house isn't my parents house. My house is still far better than the crapshoot I grew up in. But I feel like my brain doesn't recognize that, or is afraid that my house is going to turn into my parents house. And I really don't know how to change the way my brain sees these things.
I hate clutter too. I regularly go and throw stuff out thinking I won't need that only to need it a week later πŸ˜†
On the topic of parents, the impact of their parenting style/skills on their children cannot be understated. But it's easy to lay blame I guess, god knows I've done it. But they're human too and when they look back probably think to themselves "I could have done better there.."
 
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