Post your random thoughts/feelings etc

[coyote]

..I'm sorry for being random like this. I also have a problem with keeping on topic when it comes to collecting my thoughts and thinking things through before speaking.

no worries - this is the random thoughts thread

being random IS on topic

 

[BlackPuma]

My mom came in my room an hour ago, and told me that a friend of my grandmother (and a close friend of the family) fell and is now in a comma. He's in his mid 80s now, and isn't doing too well. They don't expect him to make it.

Though, it's not a sad occasion. He is a very religious man, and made full peace with that he was going to pass away soon.

He's expecting to go to heaven. Knowing that he was expecting paradise, and wasn't fretting death and illness, makes it a lot easier to accept. He is always happy and kind, and I think the best way to honor his memory if he does pass away soon, is to be happy and celebrate his life, instead of mourning his demise.

 

[Beatrice]

I don't know why my mind is full of anxiety and fear. My brain feels like a dead weight and my body is always drained of energy and I'm always tired. I slept for eight hours last night and I exercised today, but I didn't drink any water. I wish all water had the same ice cool, crisp clean taste, so it wouldn't be a problem drinking it all the time. I think I need a new water bottle, but I don't have the money to buy one right now.

Everything you need these days costs money and it's like we're constant out of money despite all of our hard labor in our jobs. It's like we live at our workplaces, so we never have a life outside our jobs. Maybe that's why I'm always drained, I never want to exercise, never hang out with friends, constantly failing in college and never doing anything I should be doing OR want to do because we don't have the money to do so. Even my father won't stop barking about money despite the fact he makes more than the whole family combine.

I think I'm anxious/stressed/depressed/tired of the life I'm living right now. I have problems reading books and anything in general all the way through because I can't seem to pay attention for more than 1 or 2 minutes. I need to change my diet and cut off the sugar, my brain can't take it. I get jittery and twist 24/7 whenever I eat more than a spoonful of sugar. But at the same time, I can't stop eating ice cream, teddy grahams or chocolate. I'm also riddled with shame/guilt when I don't do what I say I would do no matter how many times I tell myself I would.

I'm glad I exercised today, but now I'm tired and it hasn't been 30 minutes yet. I'm gonna have a healthy snack after I'm done writing this. I wonder if some of my friends are going through the same thing?

I love to draw. Drawing has always been my passion, and it breaks my heart that I rarely ever do it because I'm tired and/or lazy and my head is weighted down with all this crap. I keep trying to drink more than two glasses of water, but then I get waterlogged and I stopped trying after a couple of hours.

(**I'm sorry for being random like this. I also have a problem with keeping on topic when it comes to collecting my thoughts and thinking things through before speaking.)

I'm pretty much feeling the same way, for the most part. And then some.

 

[Phoenixx]

The thing I hate most about yearbooks (besides my picture being in them) is when people just go through it and point out who's "ugly" and who's "hot", "pretty", etc. I swear that's the only reason they get yearbooks. It's funny I'm saying this since I'm actually the editor-in-chief on my yearbook staff at school.

 

[dean01]

i havent slept for 48 hours'ish, i think?? i joined a dating site 24 hours ago on a two day pass, and have got my first date tommorro morning and another one in the evening!?!? somethings wrong!

 

[MollyBeGood]

random i can do....

I just spent a bit of time worrying and looking for something that turned out to be in my pocket. *sigh*

a robin is tweeting out my window

i sometimes get startled when the vibration goes off on my cell phone. sometimes it goes off and falls off the table onto the floor makes a loud noise and further aggitates me

i think my dog is bipolar

i need a haircut

 

[Apotheosis]

I think my being so quiet isn't just anxiety; I can never stay interested in small talk or gossip, I only ever really want to speak when people are discussing things like psychology, theology, philosophy, art and generally anything abstract or subjective in concept.

Which, it seems, very few do.

Normal people are... boring.

Feh.

 

[Deus_Ex_Lemur]

discouraged. a bit sad.
for the first time since my first year of college (a long time ago), i'm seriously considering rooming with strangers.
(i live in an expensive area. it's usually cheaper to live with others.)
i've emailed a few people. i replied to a craigslist ad that sounded too good to be true. no one's writing me back.
i wonder if i'm scaring people away. maybe i'm destined to live alone.

i feel it's very important to be honest. i said that i'm shy but friendly. i'm unemployed but looking for a job and have lots of savings. blahblah, etc.
the good news is, i'm looking at a studio apartment in a few hours. i hope i'll fall in love with it. maybe it'll be good for me to live completely alone -- something i've NEVER done.

In Virginia or still SF?

 

[Apotheosis]

Wait, were you serious? I mean, are these the drugs your family members do? If so, that's awful :/ well, obviously.....

I wish I weren't. :x

My family isn't very creative in its myriad methods of dysfunction, but it's certainly very effective.

It would be arrogant and blind for me to say I'm any better than them - my... poisons... aren't exactly a healthy mix - but I will never, ever touch anything inherently addictive because of who I've seen my parents become.

The worst part is that I still remember who they used to be...

p.s. Anyone have a paper towel? I seem to have spilled my heart all over this post.

p.p.s. "I've found out why people laugh. They laugh because it hurts so much… because it's the only thing that'll make it stop hurting."- Valentine Michael Smith

 

[superfluouslyme]

Florence + the Machine is awesome. That is all.

 

[lunarla]

The only thing that would have made this night even better is if I had kept my yum drinks from last night...

I hope I don't panic from how good I'm feeling.

 

[Paahi]

Withdrawal

 

[hoddesdon]

Hmmm...

Lol'd at Mrs Phocas who came out to see the planetary alignment and couldn't gasp why they weren't aligned - as in a straight line across the sky

So your wife was the phocas of attention. What is her maiden name - Miss Radius? Were the baby phoci there as well?

 

[MsBuzzkillington]

I am feeling like a complete failure and I don't really know why.

I bombed the last test for my class. I studied for it, briefly. Basically read over the notes that I wrote up over and over and over again. It was like the test was everything I didn't focus on, didn't memorize. The reading over and over again because when I got to the short essay questions points, I completely blanked. I lost it.

I feel so horrible. I feel worthless. I know it's ridiculous but it means I am probably not going to get an A. I have been working so hard since I came back to school. I got an A in 4 of my other classes, why not this one? Why did this one have to kill me? Why didn't I study harder? Why didn't I ask for the girls phone numbers when they were talking about a study group?

I know I missed at least 21 points, AT LEAST. I could have missed up for 30 for all I know. There was a question on defining religion from what she showed us, she asked for both definitions and I only looked at one and it was worth 7 points. I couldn't even think of a single part of that definition. All I could remember was the one she liked did not have the paranormal word in it.

I can't believe how bad I did on it. I am going to look so stupid. At least it was the last test and I won't have to see it again.

Why didn't I do the extra credit presentation? Why didn't I talk to people on anthropology day at the booth thingies so I could get extra credit?

I wanted an A so badly. I feel so depressed right now.

 

[Phoenixx]

Florence + the Machine is awesome. That is all.

^ So true

 

[KnuffleBunny]

Sometimes my boyfriend really pisses me off.

 

[Beatrice]

"Research" helps me keep my mind off my.... problems.

I have many interests. So many they overwhelm me (I am easily overwhelmed anyway). I like to look them up now and then, delve deeper, learn more. Just for the heck of it.

I feel like making a list....

I like:

marine biology, animals, photography, jewelery, cooking, healthy food, exercise, stretch routines, Pilates, Zumba, clothes, books, inspirational stories, scary stories, stories about death, language, different cultures, everything about music, chemistry, math, history, random facts, English, science in general, electronics, furniture, crocheting, cars, crafts, organization......

Hmm. Random indeed.

 

[BlackPuma]

.esrever ni egassem siht daeR

.boj dooG

 

[BlackPuma]

i'm in SF right now. at this point, i'm not sure where i'm going to end up. i have a few weeks to make up my mind. and i'm putting unnecessary stress on myself.
i've decided to look at many places in the bay area. i'm leaving to look at a studio in glen park in about 30 minutes.
(the lady i'm going to meet sounded snooty over the phone. i hope she's easier to talk to in person. i'm nervous!)

i hate having my life up in the air like this. i'm a critter of habit. i tend to avoid change. eeek. trying to deal.

I'm sure you'll do just fine, Tele. Just think about when it all done and over with. Then you can build up a routine around the new thing in your life, to make it not-so-new-yet-still-good. :3

 

[Beatrice]

.esrever ni egassem siht daeR

.boj dooG

Lol. At first I thought you were speaking some other language

Edit: Yeah, what Tino said vv I thought it was Dutch.