Solitudes_Grace
Well-known member
I've realized it is rare for a full day to go by without me calling myself an "idiot" at least once.
Post your random thoughts/feelings etc
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
MikeyC
Well-known member
Ugh, I understand your predicament. You don't want to be friends with her, but the proximity of her and the fact you have many mutual friends makes avoiding her impossible.Yeah, I don't want to be friends with her, but I do need to keep the peace for the benefit of our mutual friends. I just feel that when she's 'explaining' things to me she'll probably manipulate my forgiving nature. I need to be able to assert myself on Friday and not allow her to do that, or for her to make me feel stupid for believing the things that were said (I heard from two reliable sources what was said). She obviously feels bad now because she got found out, and so she wants to try and pretend it's not as it was, but I don't think she should be able to sweet-talk her way out of it. That's how bullies stay bullies for so long. On the other hand I don't want to wind her up because she scares me and lives very near to me and seems to be everywhere I go.
So I just need to be pleasant but firm somehow.
Hey I'll take that £390,000 from you Mikey, it's my currency
Definitely don't let her manipulate your good and forgiving nature, if you do choose to forgive. If you've heard stories from two reliable sources, forgiving just lets her keep being two-faced.
She absolutely does feel bad that she got found out and now she's trying to smokescreen the truth with some false apologies and "what really was said." I know the type. Good luck with the meeting on Friday and hopefully it all goes to plan.
I would still love that money! Too bad it was a total hoax.
Ooh, I do this, too. Learning to love ourselves is sometimes the most difficult of tasks.
Opaline
1
I thought this was beautiful.
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die...
-Anonymous
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die...
-Anonymous
MikeyC
Well-known member
I'm trying desperately to eat healthier and exercise, so as to lose some weight. However, it's just now that I'm realising how bombarded I am with chocolate and fatty food. You know, the good stuff! I had to go buy beef mince today, but I had to pass the chocolate cakes and the various baked goods the store had on display. I go to work where there's fundraiser chocolates, cakes of their own, and two vending machines. I drive anywhere and pass fast-food places, each with their own mouth-watering smells.
I can totally understand why some people, myself included, have such a difficult time resisting the urge for these things. We can't escape it, ever.
I can totally understand why some people, myself included, have such a difficult time resisting the urge for these things. We can't escape it, ever.
shakethelight
Well-known member
Hrm, have you ever tried to eat glutten free? like I really enjoy glutten free brownies when I want chocolate. and it's really about balance, never deny yourself what you want just don't over eat. And of course burn more calories than you consume. Do you like healthy stuff -organic? or is that just not for you?
MikeyC
Well-known member
I've never tried to eat gluten-free, but the problem will remain the same.
You're absolutely right that I shouldn't deny myself chocolate or a burger if I want them, but the trick is to moderate. I've had trouble with moderation my whole life. I can't stop at one cookie - I have to eat and eat until I've finished the bag.
I do love healthy food, yeah.
I'm doing well recently with my eating, and I've lost a bit of weight, actually, but maintaining this is going to be very hard, especially when depression hits and I want to turn to chocolate for comfort. This is a test! My therapist and I are working together to beat it.
KiaKaha
Banned
You know what they should do? When you go to the supermarket they should have all the healthy foods by the entrance - all the fruit and vegetables and wholegrain foods etc. They should have all the fatty biscuits and cakes and junk food at the far end of the supermarket - but heres the kicker - as you move down the aisles, going from healthy to unhealthy - the asiles get narrower and narrower - so in order to get to the cakes and things you HAVE to lose weight - because otherwise you wont be able to get to it.
My plan is bulletproof. Airtight.
You should hear about my plan to eliminate smoking.
Anyway - You can do it man. You can - you just have to put your mind to it. Changing your eating habits will be the hardest for you I think - I wouldnt change dramatically, just a few small changes so you are not left feeling disatisfied and irritated. Once you start getting fitter and stronger - your body will start to change - and females will flock to you - even more so than they do now Mr Casanova
I will now shut up. Thanks for reading.
planemo
Well-known member
You know what they should do? When you go to the supermarket they should have all the healthy foods by the entrance - all the fruit and vegetables and wholegrain foods etc. They should have all the fatty biscuits and cakes and junk food at the far end of the supermarket - but heres the kicker - as you move down the aisles, going from healthy to unhealthy - the asiles get narrower and narrower - so in order to get to the cakes and things you HAVE to lose weight - because otherwise you wont be able to get to it.
My plan is bulletproof. Airtight.
You should hear about my plan to eliminate smoking.
Anyway - You can do it man. You can - you just have to put your mind to it. Changing your eating habits will be the hardest for you I think - I wouldnt change dramatically, just a few small changes so you are not left feeling disatisfied and irritated. Once you start getting fitter and stronger - your body will start to change - and females will flock to you - even more so than they do now Mr Casanova
I will now shut up. Thanks for reading.
the thing i hate most is that in most stores (even the chain pharmacies), they place only unhealthy treats along the length of the queue. so if you decided to buy healthy stuff, you're still not completely out of the woods yet since you're bombarded will all sorts of goodies when you're waiting to pay for your goods. I couldn't resist the last time i stood in the queue.
but i agree - Mikey you must be babe magnet already. so you got nothing to worry about. :
:I've never tried to eat gluten-free, but the problem will remain the same.
You're absolutely right that I shouldn't deny myself chocolate or a burger if I want them, but the trick is to moderate. I've had trouble with moderation my whole life. I can't stop at one cookie - I have to eat and eat until I've finished the bag.
I do love healthy food, yeah.
You go Mikey. I know the temptation is hard. I've been that way with cakes, cookies and chips too, but I've found alternatives. Glad your therapist is helping, hugs.
BlueDays
1
I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That no one may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
A fortress deep and mighty,
That no one may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
Starry
Well-known member
I've never tried to eat gluten-free, but the problem will remain the same.
You're absolutely right that I shouldn't deny myself chocolate or a burger if I want them, but the trick is to moderate. I've had trouble with moderation my whole life. I can't stop at one cookie - I have to eat and eat until I've finished the bag.
I do love healthy food, yeah.
Yay for you! ^_^
I used to have trouble resisting "bad" foods too... But then I went super tough on myself and cut them out all together... And developed an eating disorder in the process. Not good. But just moderation is the best way to go about things, as you said. Maybe you could set yourself an allowance of "bad food" for the week and not let yourself go over... That way, if you reach the end of the week and you're under the amount you can have a bigger "treat" and feel extra good about yourself which will give you extra motivation... Or try to go without for a day and then have it the next day? Perhaps teaching your body to wait longer in between the "bad" foods. Believe it or not, cravings for these things do diminish with time if you don't give into them so much...
Whatever happens, I wish you nothing but success with it!
MikeyC
Well-known member
Haha, thanks for all the replies, guys and gals.
No, I'm not a babe magnet or a Casanova - just a regular guy trying to overcome really bad overeating.
I am not cutting out chocolate altogether, because I want to enjoy life once in a while, haha! My issue is always with portion control and moderation. I would eat way too much and then feel sluggish later, and that's never a good sign. With the help of my therapist, and of a food diary, I'm trying to change that.
So far, I've been quite successful in the way I'm eating. I'm cooking a little more, I'm eating less chocolate, and I have lost a little bit of weight. I hope to continue this but I also realise one bad mood can ruin it all. I need to stay focused and talk to my therapist if anything goes wrong.
Again, thanks for all the replies. You're all lovely.
Kia, I'm interested: what IS your plan for eliminating smoking?
No, I'm not a babe magnet or a Casanova - just a regular guy trying to overcome really bad overeating.
I am not cutting out chocolate altogether, because I want to enjoy life once in a while, haha! My issue is always with portion control and moderation. I would eat way too much and then feel sluggish later, and that's never a good sign. With the help of my therapist, and of a food diary, I'm trying to change that.
So far, I've been quite successful in the way I'm eating. I'm cooking a little more, I'm eating less chocolate, and I have lost a little bit of weight. I hope to continue this but I also realise one bad mood can ruin it all. I need to stay focused and talk to my therapist if anything goes wrong.
Again, thanks for all the replies. You're all lovely.
Kia, I'm interested: what IS your plan for eliminating smoking?
shakethelight
Well-known member
Jersey Shore has been cancelled from television. Miracles do exist. oh and I am enjoying being home alone. Thus, making me even more so want to overcome this & get out of here. I haven't felt depressed/worthless/anxieous so maybe it's not me but themm.
oh and I am enjoying being home alone. Thus, making me even more so want to overcome this & get out of here. I haven't felt depressed/worthless/anxieous so maybe it's not me but themm.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Jersey Shore has been cancelled from television. Miracles do exist.
Oh... thank f**k for that! Gives me hope that there might actually be a God.
JuiceB
Well-known member
Good. I never could understand that mess.Jersey Shore has been cancelled from television. Miracles do exist.
shakethelight
Well-known member
Right! How do you think I feel being from NJ and an Italian/American. It makes us look like alcoholic douche bags who waste our time drinking & all we care about is blow out and being tan. Oh and gym tan and laundry!
@JuiceB. Now, if they get rid of the rest of those Jersey shows I will feel victory. I don't understand what it is about my state & reality tv.
Rembrandt Broam
Well-known member
I do use that currency, so I'd be more than happy to help you out by putting it to very good use.
planemo
Well-known member
I really enjoyed reading that.
It reminded me of something that came up when speaking with my therapist today. The feeling of disconnecting from others and shutting yourself away from others. Out of sight, out of mind. If you don't see others, the feelings they invoke within disappear.
Hoppy
Well-known member
No Man Is An Island
No man is an island,
Entire of itself.
Each is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less.
As well as if a promontory were.
As well as if a manor of thine own
Or of thine friend's were.
Each man's death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.
-John Donne