I think I need a sign over my bed that read "Go to sleep; You'll feel better in the morning" because that almost always seems to be the case. Nonetheless I periodically find myself up late feeling the need to find the solution some problem that weighs much more heavily on me at midnight than at 8 am. Last night, as it frequently has been in my adult life, that problem was my money/life balance. And this is a real issue for me, but my only options aren't 1) Magically win the lottery 2) Use a mystical watch that can stop time to steal unnoticeably small amounts of money from multiple stores over time, and then launder that money through a online book selling business so the IRS doesn't get suspicious and I also don't have to talk to people 3)Make a YouTube video and watch it on repeat to collect ad revenue, because no one's thought of that before, or 4) Die.
I generally cycle through a lot more ideas than that, but they all either seem to either be wishful thinking or a miserable existence/death. Cycle is actually a good word, because I usually cycle from one to the other. Like, I'll decide a practical ("practical") solution is to work 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 70 years, and then maybe retire for a day before old age gets me. Obviously that sounds shitty, so instead I think about how I could instead casually become a famous Twitch player and easily make my living playing video games all day ("Casually", "Easily"). After spending some time coming up with a course of action to accomplish that, I remember no one would want to watch me play video games, let alone pay me. That sends me back to the options the harsh reality has for me. Like get a real job and be perpetually stressed, exhausted and bitter. Or I could do nothing!...And live with my parents forever! And on and on ad nauseam.
Eventually I go to sleep, wake up in the morning, and feel fine. The harsh realities I have to deal with haven't gone away, and the magical solutions for them are no more likely than they were the night before, but I see the middle area between them a little more clearly now. Ironically though, I decided to write this in the evening which has now become night, so now all I can think about is deciding between finding a sugar momma, or getting hit by a bus.
Go to sleep vj, you'll feel better in the morning.
I wish you well with it!
I dont feel 47, I do have people say I look younger quite often. I certainly dont feel 47.. 
