Post your random thoughts/feelings etc

I'd be surprised if six people show up, but when it comes to my symptoms, two is as bad as twenty.

I joined a local meetup group as well, about a month ago (of course I haven't attended any of the get-together's, I just lurk on the front page). I think the fact that fifty is over the next hill (even though it's still eight years away) is starting to motivate me to try a normal life one more time.

I know how my life is gonna play out, though. I've seen this pattern a few times by now and it never works.

Mate.. you're only 42?? I'm 47. Never stop trying..


I thoroughly agree with Pug!
Fountain, you still have years of chances in front of you. A little tweak here, a little tweak there, then you may end up with a whole different (and good) outcome.
Good on you for listening to your motivation for trying one more time, Fountain!! (y) I wish you well with it!

This is where I wish we all lived close by each other. I would be quite happy to be your wingman! no, wait.... winglady?.....winggirl? .....wing-person? :unsure: anywhoo, I would soooo be up for helping you with your endeavour. (or endeavor, with you being an american :p )
 

FountainandFairfax

in a VAN down by the RIVER
Antacids and ice cream are the only thing that can save me now.

200w.webp
 

Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
Huh. I've been offered a couple of possibly interesting opportunities in the last weeks that would force me to get out there and, you know, meet new people. One volunteering position that would be a good way to contribute positively to this world. One other volunteering position that could turn into an epic adventure. And one paid position that would make me look very cool but would also force me to quit my current job for a 3 months contract.

Too bad all I want right now is to be alone and read books.
 

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Huh. I've been offered a couple of possibly interesting opportunities in the last weeks that would force me to get out there and, you know, meet new people. One volunteering position that would be a good way to contribute positively to this world. One other volunteering position that could turn into an epic adventure. And one paid position that would make me look very cool but would also force me to quit my current job for a 3 months contract.

Too bad all I want right now is to be alone and read books.
Wow interesting conundrum Pacific.
What do you think you'll do? :unsure:
 

vj288

not actually Fiona Apple
I think I need a sign over my bed that read "Go to sleep; You'll feel better in the morning" because that almost always seems to be the case. Nonetheless I periodically find myself up late feeling the need to find the solution some problem that weighs much more heavily on me at midnight than at 8 am. Last night, as it frequently has been in my adult life, that problem was my money/life balance. And this is a real issue for me, but my only options aren't 1) Magically win the lottery 2) Use a mystical watch that can stop time to steal unnoticeably small amounts of money from multiple stores over time, and then launder that money through a online book selling business so the IRS doesn't get suspicious and I also don't have to talk to people 3)Make a YouTube video and watch it on repeat to collect ad revenue, because no one's thought of that before, or 4) Die.

I generally cycle through a lot more ideas than that, but they all either seem to either be wishful thinking or a miserable existence/death. Cycle is actually a good word, because I usually cycle from one to the other. Like, I'll decide a practical ("practical") solution is to work 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 70 years, and then maybe retire for a day before old age gets me. Obviously that sounds shitty, so instead I think about how I could instead casually become a famous Twitch player and easily make my living playing video games all day ("Casually", "Easily"). After spending some time coming up with a course of action to accomplish that, I remember no one would want to watch me play video games, let alone pay me. That sends me back to the options the harsh reality has for me. Like get a real job and be perpetually stressed, exhausted and bitter. Or I could do nothing!...And live with my parents forever! And on and on ad nauseam.

Eventually I go to sleep, wake up in the morning, and feel fine. The harsh realities I have to deal with haven't gone away, and the magical solutions for them are no more likely than they were the night before, but I see the middle area between them a little more clearly now. Ironically though, I decided to write this in the evening which has now become night, so now all I can think about is deciding between finding a sugar momma, or getting hit by a bus.

Go to sleep vj, you'll feel better in the morning.
 
I think I need a sign over my bed that read "Go to sleep; You'll feel better in the morning" because that almost always seems to be the case. Nonetheless I periodically find myself up late feeling the need to find the solution some problem that weighs much more heavily on me at midnight than at 8 am. Last night, as it frequently has been in my adult life, that problem was my money/life balance. And this is a real issue for me, but my only options aren't 1) Magically win the lottery 2) Use a mystical watch that can stop time to steal unnoticeably small amounts of money from multiple stores over time, and then launder that money through a online book selling business so the IRS doesn't get suspicious and I also don't have to talk to people 3)Make a YouTube video and watch it on repeat to collect ad revenue, because no one's thought of that before, or 4) Die.

I generally cycle through a lot more ideas than that, but they all either seem to either be wishful thinking or a miserable existence/death. Cycle is actually a good word, because I usually cycle from one to the other. Like, I'll decide a practical ("practical") solution is to work 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 70 years, and then maybe retire for a day before old age gets me. Obviously that sounds shitty, so instead I think about how I could instead casually become a famous Twitch player and easily make my living playing video games all day ("Casually", "Easily"). After spending some time coming up with a course of action to accomplish that, I remember no one would want to watch me play video games, let alone pay me. That sends me back to the options the harsh reality has for me. Like get a real job and be perpetually stressed, exhausted and bitter. Or I could do nothing!...And live with my parents forever! And on and on ad nauseam.

Eventually I go to sleep, wake up in the morning, and feel fine. The harsh realities I have to deal with haven't gone away, and the magical solutions for them are no more likely than they were the night before, but I see the middle area between them a little more clearly now. Ironically though, I decided to write this in the evening which has now become night, so now all I can think about is deciding between finding a sugar momma, or getting hit by a bus.

Go to sleep vj, you'll feel better in the morning.


I always enjoy reading your long posts, vj!! They are always insightful and entertaining at the same time. (y) 💛
Sorry, my mind is too exhausted to think/offer any advise on your dilemma atm.

I should put a sign above my bed that says:
"Stop stressing Blue! There is always tomorrow, to get it done" :)
 
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