Post your random thoughts/feelings etc

I can return to driving soon, 50km radius, in daylight hours for 3 months.

Kiwong said: ↑

I can return to driving soon, 50km radius, in daylight hours for 3 months.

Feels like freedom, don't it Kiwong? 😀

How are you doing?

Ffeeling good Fountian, a little bit bored, as without a car there is a limit to what you can do. Glad to be back at work, never thought I would say that. Keen to re-establish my old life.

i feel really bored now. i wanted to go to a specific church tomorrow but i didn't want to go alone so i guess i will have to go to the one i didn't really want to go to..

Yesterday was a bad day, i'm always trying to be happy and positive, but sometimes is very hard. Making friends is very hard for me because a rerely let anyone inside my own space, i'm aways cool on the outside and i get along with others but i (almost) never let anyone inside. It hurts when you start opening to another person and develope some kind connection/bound with said person and then comes another one out of nowhere who seems a better version of yourself and makes you feel eclipsed, like removed from the group...it hurts cause i'm somewhat vulnerable on that moment and my feelings feel trampled. Makes me feel inferior. What really hurt is that that other person "The friend" didn't even tried to make me feel part of the conversation (the group) as much as i tried.

I rarely get upset but is even rarer for me to forgive (or at least forget) when i see some behaviours i despise. Probably these bonds are weakened forever, cause even if i forgive this person, my trust is lost.

Anyway, today i'm much better and i remembered Sarah's post (thank you, sometimes i forget to remind myself those words), when life hits me it only make my skin thicker. I'm looking forward to become a better me and to improve my weaknesses. I wont let anyone (i'll try) make me feel eclipsed again!

After all, this isn't even my final form! haha (DBZ reference)

Feels so good being on this site, i've been on other SP (spanish) forums and none feels like this one, a home on the internet.

Success to me is what I create my writing, photography,. my enjoyment of nature.

I am not competing against anyone, just seeking out the things that bring me peace.

lily said: ↑

i feel really bored now. i wanted to go to a specific church tomorrow but i didn't want to go alone so i guess i will have to go to the one i didn't really want to go to..

Could you try going to the one you really want to go to, but just sit right up the back of the church - in the last row of seats - where not many people will see that you are there alone, lily? 🙂

F0AM said: ↑

Yesterday was a bad day, i'm always trying to be happy and positive, but sometimes is very hard. Making friends is very hard for me because a rerely let anyone inside my own space, i'm aways cool on the outside and i get along with others but i (almost) never let anyone inside. It hurts when you start opening to another person and develope some kind connection/bound with said person and then comes another one out of nowhere who seems a better version of yourself and makes you feel eclipsed, like removed from the group...it hurts cause i'm somewhat vulnerable on that moment and my feelings feel trampled. Makes me feel inferior. What really hurt is that that other person "The friend" didn't even tried to make me feel part of the conversation (the group) as much as i tried.

I rarely get upset but is even rarer for me to forgive (or at least forget) when i see some behaviours i despise. Probably these bonds are weakened forever, cause even if i forgive this person, my trust is lost.

Anyway, today i'm much better and i remembered Sarah's post (thank you, sometimes i forget to remind myself those words), when life hits me it only make my skin thicker. I'm looking forward to become a better me and to improve my weaknesses. I wont let anyone (i'll try) make me feel eclipsed again!

After all, this isn't even my final form! haha (DBZ reference)

Feels so good being on this site, i've been on other SP (spanish) forums and none feels like this one, a home on the internet.

Yes, it is very hard for people like us to let other people get close to us, because that then results in them being able to hurt us. It is a survival mechanism, but sometimes it goes into overdrive, lol. :sad:

Sorry to hear you had a bad experience with losing the trust of that friend, FOAM.
I really wish all of us in SPW did not live so far apart. Users in here could become great long term friends, if only we lived closer to each other.

F0AM said: ↑

Yesterday was a bad day, i'm always trying to be happy and positive, but sometimes is very hard. Making friends is very hard for me because a rerely let anyone inside my own space, i'm aways cool on the outside and i get along with others but i (almost) never let anyone inside. It hurts when you start opening to another person and develope some kind connection/bound with said person and then comes another one out of nowhere who seems a better version of yourself and makes you feel eclipsed, like removed from the group...it hurts cause i'm somewhat vulnerable on that moment and my feelings feel trampled. Makes me feel inferior. What really hurt is that that other person "The friend" didn't even tried to make me feel part of the conversation (the group) as much as i tried.

I rarely get upset but is even rarer for me to forgive (or at least forget) when i see some behaviours i despise. Probably these bonds are weakened forever, cause even if i forgive this person, my trust is lost.

Anyway, today i'm much better and i remembered Sarah's post (thank you, sometimes i forget to remind myself those words), when life hits me it only make my skin thicker. I'm looking forward to become a better me and to improve my weaknesses. I wont let anyone (i'll try) make me feel eclipsed again!

After all, this isn't even my final form! haha (DBZ reference)

Feels so good being on this site, i've been on other SP (spanish) forums and none feels like this one, a home on the internet.

Being vulnerable with anyone is absolutely terrifying. That said, you will never form any type of close bond with anyone unless you allow yourself to be vulnerable. I have learned this the hard way. Sometimes you will get rejected, other times accepted, but you can't let the rejection prevent you from trying.

You are such an awesome person, F0AM. I consider myself very fortunate to be able to call you my friend.

So hang in there - it's only going to get better from here <3

BlueDays said: ↑

Could you try going to the one you really want to go to, but just sit right up the back of the church - in the last row of seats - where not many people will see that you are there alone, lily? 🙂

No it's more of the fact i want to be talked to but by the right people, i don't want to be alone and that's why i'd have to go w/ others who go to a different church where people don't interact w/ others at the church except be amongst themselves which is not what a church should be like even though they have gathering in groups but it should even be at the church, and it's not like the church i used to go to where people after service would talk to eachother. Thanks for your reply 🙂

lily said: ↑

No it's more of the fact i want to be talked to but by the right people, i don't want to be alone and that's why i'd have to go w/ others who go to a different church where people don't interact w/ others at the church except be amongst themselves which is not what a church should be like even though they have gathering in groups but it should even be at the church, and it's not like the church i used to go to where people after service would talk to eachother. Thanks for your reply 🙂

Why don't the people at that church talk to you?

Don't bother walking a mile in my shoes, that would be boring.

Spend 30 seconds in my head.
That'll freak you right out.

(づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ Awww ma gurls Blue and Sarah! Thank you a lot.

BlueDays said: ↑

I really wish all of us in SPW did not live so far apart. Users in here could become great long term friends, if only we lived closer to each other.

YES, on one of the spanish forums they're planning a meet up. I think is a good idea since it will be with users i feel comfortable with so i'll probably go BUT i'm not gonna lie, i wish it were with the users from this site : )

Sarah_M said: ↑

You are such an awesome person, F0AM. I consider myself very fortunate to be able to call you my friend.

So hang in there - it's only going to get better from here <3

Thank you Sarah! it's nice to have people out there that appreciate you, as i said once, i like being alone (physically speaking) but not feeling alone, thanks to this forum and a couple of "real" friends (people on here are aso real lol but you know what i mean) i don't feel that way. I also consider you a friend : )

After all, through this site we now each other better than what any real (again) person will ever do. This may not be the most active forum out there but i think is one of its charms, like a small community full of nice neightbours.

For me is easier to open myself on this site (even using a second language) than what it is on any other place :bigsmile:

Always quick to pretend you're the victim, eh? And you wonder why I have so little trust in you, or why I always assume you're lying to me.

i don't know what's wrong with me, why it's so hard to heal from sp.

Hey friends, guess what?! I bought a car!!!! I'm so excited! 😀

Sarah_M said: ↑

Hey friends, guess what?! I bought a car!!!! I'm so excited! 😀

Sooo....where are you driving us to?

Look at this:









They're thumbnails for videos that were recommended for me on YouTube.

Hope they're not clickbaits!