For the past ten years, I have been driving to Oakland every year, in the days before the day of the dead. I buy marigolds as well as supplies to make sugarskulls and to buy things needed for my altar. I have built a great friendship with the owners of this cultural shop. As I prepare to go this year, I receive a letter in the mail that one of the owners has passed. I am deeply saddened by this news. In memory of her late husband, his wife is inviting close friends to come on Sunday and take all that is needed for their coming celebration.. Since that is what he would have wanted. It will be closed to everyone except those whom received invitation.
Since receiving her letter... I feel such heaviness. I will be making the drive to go out there, but I have anxiety about what to tell her. How to show how much I lament his passing.
This has been keeping me awake for the past few nights. My stomach hurts at the thought of having o face her in such a difficult time.
Am I an a.sshole for considering to stay home? Gah. I am an as.sshole.
Ok, I'm going.
^ When my mind is blank and I can't think of anything to say at a particular up and coming occasion, beforehand I go to a store that sells really nicely written Greeting Cards for all occasions.
I read through what is written on many of them pertaining to that specific occasion and memorize the wording.
Then I just recite the nicely worded paragraph to the people at that specific occasion - although make sure it does not sound too rehearsed, lol.
Yes it is cheating, but I find it easier than getting a blank mind right at a vital moment of communication.
Are you able to not have any contact with your sister at all? I have stopped having any contact with mine because she is so toxic. My self-esteem has improved greatly since ending contact with her.
^ Ah regret not having done this years ago. I'm actually thinking about do this in a few months time, afore ah got intae hospital for a few day. Or would that just be really c*nty of me, like? :thinking:
Gonna try and get back with a charity group Ive been avoiding. I think for the most part Im doing pretty good as long as Im not put on the spot in front of a large crowd. And I think thats normal for a lot of people tbh.
Anyone knows how to remove a shoe's pull strap? Most of my shoes have it and I really dislike it because it makes my pants get stuck in weird shapes. Google gives me nothing.
Anyone knows how to remove a shoe's pull strap? Most of my shoes have it and I really dislike it because it makes my pants get stuck in weird shapes. Google gives me nothing.
^ When my mind is blank and I can't think of anything to say at a particular up and coming occasion, beforehand I go to a store that sells really nicely written Greeting Cards for all occasions.
I read through what is written on many of them pertaining to that specific occasion and memorize the wording.
Then I just recite the nicely worded paragraph to the people at that specific occasion - although make sure it does not sound too rehearsed, lol.
Yes it is cheating, but I find it easier than getting a blank mind right at a vital moment of communication.
That is actually a great idea, blue.
I ended up just saying "I'm sorry for your loss" all while cringing. I know how easy that phrase loses any validity after so many repeated uses.
I did end up writing her a letter though... Where I expressed more in depth how saddened I was.
I always wonder, though.... Why do we have to say something? Sometimes there are just no words.
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