Post your random thoughts/feelings etc

springk

springk

Well-known member
I always find a sense dissatisfaction with myself. I am also very bored deep down. And being online increases my boredom. I often feel being online hurts me more than just doing or not doing anything in real life. When I am online, I worry about having no friends. Even online I don't have much, even a few I do talk to are not the one who initiate conversations usually. Some don't respond. I wonder what a bore I am that no one wants to talk to me even online. I don't have many topics to talk on..and not an interesting life at all( nothing exciting happens within my four walls).
I thought I will try meeting people online but I am beginning to feel that I should drop the idea. And it hurts really bad when I am so desperate for a talk because it gets so lonely at times or most of the times and I have NO one to talk to..!
I so need a friend right now! I also try telling myself that I can live alone and I don't need friendship. I try to be on my own but I know deep down how much lonely I feel. Life without someone to share your feeling and thoughts is a torturous thing.
 
BlueDays

BlueDays

1
springk said:
I always find a sense dissatisfaction with myself. I am also very bored deep down. And being online increases my boredom. I often feel being online hurts me more than just doing or not doing anything in real life. When I am online, I worry about having no friends. Even online I don't have much, even a few I do talk to are not the one who initiate conversations usually. Some don't respond. I wonder what a bore I am that no one wants to talk to me even online. I don't have many topics to talk on..and not an interesting life at all( nothing exciting happens within my four walls).
I thought I will try meeting people online but I am beginning to feel that I should drop the idea. And it hurts really bad when I am so desperate for a talk because it gets so lonely at times or most of the times and I have NO one to talk to..!
I so need a friend right now! I also try telling myself that I can live alone and I don't need friendship. I try to be on my own but I know deep down how much lonely I feel. Life without someone to share your feeling and thoughts is a torturous thing.
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^It certainly is, springk. You are welcome to send me a PM if you need to talk. I can't offer much support at the moment, but I always have the ability to be a good listener.
 
Ithior

Ithior

Well-known member
I'm seriously getting tired of this. I buy food with my own money for myself and make it clear that it is mine and I don't want others eating it. For example, my mum always buys cheese but I don't like it so I bought a different type of cheese. Everyone else started eating mine instead of theirs and didn't tell me a thing about it, even though they had the other cheese they're perfectly fine with (if they aren't why do they buy it in the first place?). This cheese I bought only had like 8 or 10 slices, and I only ate 3 or 4 of them at best. I was about to make a sandwich with another slice now but when I got there the cheese was gone. No one admits to have eaten the last one, even though that person had to put the box in the washing machine and the aluminium inside in the garbage.

Guess I'm going to ask for a mini fridge for my birthday so I can keep all my food in my room.
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Why am I here? What's ma purpose in life? Coz ah sure as heck huv'nae found it yet. Ah jist feel no matter whit ah do, ah'll never be good enough

It doesnae exactly help that, as well as high expectationd that ah doubt I'll ever met, the people in ma life seem tae think they know me better than ah know masel'. Or feel they can judge ma character based on trivial things like ma personal tastes. Nae idea if ah hud a point here? But if there was a point it's that ah don't think I'm as smart or as funny as some folk gimme credit for. :idontknow:
 
shyflower

shyflower

Well-known member
How do you get rid of someone out of your life when they just don't get it? I have told them off, tried the mean approach, stopped contacting them, etc and they still insist on talking to me. I don't want the drama.. They go from being mean when drunk, ignoring me when sober.. back to being nice when sober.. then flirty when drunk. I can't deal with a friendship like that.. I'm just not feeling a friendship there.
 
J

jc972

1
shyflower said:
How do you get rid of someone out of your life when they just don't get it? I have told them off, tried the mean approach, stopped contacting them, etc and they still insist on talking to me. I don't want the drama.. They go from being mean when drunk, ignoring me when sober.. back to being nice when sober.. then flirty when drunk. I can't deal with a friendship like that.. I'm just not feeling a friendship there.
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Mr. Margarita? Or somebody else just like him?
 
J

jc972

1
shyflower said:
Yep.. It's that dumba** again.. Awful damn clingy or needy towards me and I don't know why.
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You must be one awesome gal. I thought you told that douchebag to hit the road a long time ago. Tell him to lose your number. Or else.....

The "or else" being that you'd put his number on the internet with an ad for a classic car for sale real cheap but only call between 10 p.m. and 7a.m. OR put it on a dating site ad with a fake womans profile. And ask for respondants to send pictures!

Two can play this game :cool:
 
shyflower

shyflower

Well-known member
jc972 said:
You must be one awesome gal. I thought you told that douchebag to hit the road a long time ago. Tell him to lose your number. Or else.....

The "or else" being that you'd put his number on the internet with an ad for a classic car for sale real cheap but only call between 10 p.m. and 7a.m. OR put it on a dating site ad with a fake womans profile. And ask for respondants to send pictures!

Two can play this game :cool:
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I did tell him.. He hangs out at the place I go on the weekends. I'm not going to stop going to my favorite place because of him. He has a new friend ..she is 62.. waayy older than me. She spends a lot of time around him. She can have ALL of him. I know what it is, she thinks she is sooo hot.. but really..she don't got it like she thinks she does no more and tries to dress like a young person to get his attention. I don't try so hard for that attention.
 
Kiwong

Kiwong

Well-known member
pc is fixed. No loss of software or files. Think I will buy an external hard drive to back up my computers contents.
 
J

jc972

1
shyflower said:
I did tell him.. He hangs out at the place I go on the weekends. I'm not going to stop going to my favorite place because of him. He has a new friend ..she is 62.. waayy older than me. She spends a lot of time around him. She can have ALL of him. I know what it is, she thinks she is sooo hot.. but really..she don't got it like she thinks she does no more and tries to dress like a young person to get his attention. I don't try so hard for that attention.
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Did they break out of the nursing home together? Wtf?
 
shyflower

shyflower

Well-known member
jc972 said:
Did they break out of the nursing home together? Wtf?
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I'm wandering...:thinking: I can tell you that when I first met her and he introduced me to her. She said to me" I don't want to take up all of his time but he really makes her laugh and she said she did not want to intrude on any friendship me and him had". I tell you.. she seems clingy as well. I have actually told her off. She told me I wasn't going to look as good as her when I got to be her age.. I got tired of her mouth and I told her to not laugh too hard or he would have to make a trip to Walmart to buy her some more Depends. I hate confrontation, but she went off on me and didn't even know me.
 
J

jc972

1
shyflower said:
I'm wandering...:thinking: I can tell you that when I first met her and he introduced me to her. She said to me" I don't want to take up all of his time but he really makes her laugh and she said she did not want to intrude on any friendship me and him had". I tell you.. she seems clingy as well. I have actually told her off. She told me I wasn't going to look as good as her when I got to be her age.. I got tired of her mouth and I told her to not laugh too hard or he would have to make a trip to Walmart to buy her some more Depends. I hate confrontation, but she went off on me and didn't even know me.
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I'd be finding me a new group of friends. Sounds like she wanted to share him with you. Weird. Really weird. I'm curious though, how old is the guy and how old are you? I ask because if some 60something yr old woman was chasing me, she better be holding a plate of cookies!
 
shyflower

shyflower

Well-known member
jc972 said:
I'd be finding me a new group of friends. Sounds like she wanted to share him with you. Weird. Really weird. I'm curious though, how old is the guy and how old are you? I ask because if some 60something yr old woman was chasing me, she better be holding a plate of cookies!
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I will message you
 
Steiner

Steiner

Well-known member
Coconutty.

Constant deep feeling of loneliness that occur daily, ruthlessly and without warrant. Was cleaning up my parent's old house to sell and stumbled upon some fun items while cleaning my sister's room. A hello kitty pipe and some flavored condoms. Along with a ball of bud. I didn't really think much of it at the time and just continued cleaning. Weird thoughts in my head. I don't know if I should ask her if she wants them. She did say she doesn't care. I don't really care either I just need to remove everything from the house.

...

I went ahead and just packaged them up like normal though my parents did find them somehow. Though I don't think anyone really cares. My parents in fact asked my if I wanted to smoke up to see if it would help me with my problem along with some other *cough* comments I won't bother sharing.

Been feeling kind of sick overall for various reasons as I continue to degrade.

Degrade how? Wish I could explain that. Not sure where to start to explain or how. Confusion.

I got some muesli from the store. Along with other food products. I wanted the muesli mainly. The hard cider was just a bonus.

...It's been a long day.

I should just be more blunt with people. Stop trying to humor them because in the end I will always lose at that game.

Should also stop trying to be outgoing. If I have to *try* to be likable by people then something isn't right. Fake it until you make it doesn't seem to work for me because I successfully fake it and people start to like me but I can't seem to keep up the fake personality. The constant charade makes me feel like I am going insane. Not sure how to explain but eventually I shut-down. Or when I am on the verge of shutting-down I become incredibly awkward and unlikable even; it ends up seeming I am trying too hard. Perhaps some of the time the likable me is the real me but a lot of the time I don't want to feel like I am the main star and everyone is counting on me to say something witty or do something hilarious. I guess that isn't me.

It all feels wrong.

Perhaps the only reason I bother is because of the loneliness.
 
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J

jc972

1
Deja Vu said:
Coconutty.

Constant deep feeling of loneliness that occur daily, ruthlessly and without warrant. Was cleaning up my parent's old house to sell and stumbled upon some fun items while cleaning my sister's room. A hello kitty pipe and some flavored condoms. Along with a ball of bud. I didn't really think much of it at the time and just continued cleaning. Weird thoughts in my head. I don't know if I should ask her if she wants them. She did say she doesn't care. I don't really care either I just need to remove everything from the house.

...

I went ahead and just packaged them up like normal though my parents did find them somehow. Though I don't think anyone really cares. My parents in fact asked my if I wanted to smoke up to see if it would help me with my problem along with some other *cough* comments I won't bother sharing.

Been feeling kind of sick overall for various reasons as I continue to degrade.

Degrade how? Wish I could explain that. Not sure where to start to explain or how. Confusion.

I got some muesli from the store. Along with other food products. I wanted the muesli mainly. The hard cider was just a bonus.

...It's been a long day.
Click to expand...

Hello kitty pipe and flavored rubbers? Kids these days. Gettin high and gettin it on. Wow.
 
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