(poll) How important are looks in terms of dating someone?

[Richey]

I was at a function the other night and we were all sat randomly at round tables. there was one guy who was tall and charming and all four girls on the table flirted and laughed at him for the whole night. i made a great effort to but it was clear this guy is the sort of guy girls want in an idealistic sense
its a reprasentation of the how the world works i think....

this guy would get up and hold the girls hands and play around in a touchy feely was as well but not enough to invade personal space. he just had the magic formula and the right look.

i had to get up occasionally to go to the bathroom just to get away because it was hard to sit there and watch it all go on but it was interesting to see.

thom yorke once said he used to go to parties and he'd meet girls he know he'd never have a chance with because of his lazy eye etc and he would be positive and try his best but it never came to anything because the tall looker across the othe side of the bar would swoop in and that was the end of that ....

i think some of what he says is true in terms of the majority but there will always be girls who may see things differently from other angles.

i'd say looks have just as much impact as someone who is the life of the party. both types tend to get alot of attention.

 

[Day_Tripper]

Life would be so much easier for me if I didn't care how a potential girlfriend looks. I don't want them to care how I look, so it makes me a hypocrite for being judgmental. I hate that about myself! -_-

 

[Noca]

Gurls mainly go for personalities, and guys mainly go for looks. Thats how I see it.

 

[nephatitus]

hehehe if a girls were to go out with me and for some odd reason i actually like her for reasons besides being awesome and interesting, i would feel pretty lucky. Most girls i have been around with were very beautiful but lacked the mind, so i pretty much felt like shooting my brain out while talking to them

 

[Jim_Bergerac]

Gurls mainly go for personalities, and guys mainly go for looks. Thats how I see it.

That's not true. I feel quite insulted by that.

 

[AsHLeY]

I think looks can only get you so far in the dating world. If you find someone attractive at first and you're not into their personality, they don't end up looking as good anymore. Same with the other way around. I think if at first glance, you don't really view someone as being attractive but after talking to them, you're really into their personality ~ they just seem so much better looking. I'd say personality definitely outranks looks.

 

[Bullied Anonymous]

In my opinion, looks are just as important as a personality (please here me out). Everybody has their on brand of people they're attracted to. Its like that attraction reels you in ,then once the personality comes into play, you'll know whether to stay or jump back into the water. If there's no physical attraction, you'd probably be a little hesitant about getting to know that person.
If you do get to know them, that's great ,but it usually doesn't work out. Then again, you never know.

 

[LycraPantiies92]

Tbh, I don't care what others think, looks do not matter at all. Can tell that cos people that don't have amazing looks (most of us) date.
But me..well I have no chance. I'm not exactly ugly (I don't think) Yet have no chance at all of dating. Something proved there.

 

[Brokenx]

Tbh, I don't care what others think, looks do not matter at all. Can tell that cos people that don't have amazing looks (most of us) date.
But me..well I have no chance. I'm not exactly ugly (I don't think) Yet have no chance at all of dating. Something proved there.

Why would you think u have no chance at dating?

 

[klytus]

Why would you think u have no chance at dating?

The fact that she thinks that is the actual reason why she has no chance. In the undateables' defense, though, I have to say that being desperate is - at least for men - part of a vicious circle. If you are desperate - that is, desperately want a girlfriend - you aren't attractive to women, and hence you stay desperate. That is, you would have to kill the desperation first before even considering wanting to date. There are ways to do this, but most are out of the reach of someone with SA or severe depression, apparently.

In many cases, people with intense mental issues shouldn't date anyway - such activities may be more detrimental than helpful to one's mental health.

 

[Jim_Bergerac]

Tbh, I don't care what others think, looks do not matter at all. Can tell that cos people that don't have amazing looks (most of us) date.
But me..well I have no chance. I'm not exactly ugly (I don't think) Yet have no chance at all of dating. Something proved there.

I can understand how you feel. I was always put down about how I looked, called ugly, always overlooked by women, on the very few occasions I did ask women out they said no and one even said no because I was ugly.
I do now aim to look my very best but the years of put downs and made to feel ugly and undesirable have brainwashed me into believing I am just not good enough. I meet some nice women at work and I get on well with them but I just feel I am so inferior to them because they look nice and attractive and I believe I am not and people don't see me as attractive.

I don't believe any women could fancy me or want me, so I don't believe I have any chance of dating either. At the same time I am not desperate and just after anyone. I want to meet someone I like and am interested in. I couldn't think of anything worse than being with someone I didn't really have feelings for.

 

[Nicholas]

We must remember that there are very ugly people who have a partner or are even married. Yes, I'm talking about people who you see and think "He/she is really ugly, I would never like someone like that", and you know those people exist, because we all have our own personal taste, we can't seriously say that we like "everyone". So, you see those ugly people, and they are engaged, they are happy... and you have to wonder "how is that possible?" for at least a moment.
The answer can be pretty simple, if you think about it: no one loves someone else only because of the way they look. Also, some people like horror movies, other people hate them... how comes? If you keep that in mind, you'll realize that everyone has a chance to be happy and be loved.

Yes, I know, this shallow world makes everything difficult for people who are not "perfect", but... that's the way you were born, it's no use obsessing over things you can't change.

 

[Some_guy]

They are rather important for a girl. For a guy, most important thing is confidence and his ability to make a girl feel secure.

That being said, I've found some girls attractive that do not fit the beauty standards at all. Those girls, a lot of guys would disagree on their beauty I'm sure, but that wouldn't change my attraction towards them.

 

[tooshytosay]

I guess in a way your "looks" does say something about you - to some extent.

By this I'm NOT meaning the genetically-based "look" we are born with, which we generally cannot change;

But rather things that reflect how well you look after yourself, such as how well groomed you are, how clean you are, whether you take pride in your appearance, etc.

These latter things in my view portray that the person cares about themselves, hence (presumably) is able to care about another person.

And as for genetically-determined "look" - I think everyone's beautiful and unique in their own way.

 

[Noca]

That's not true. I feel quite insulted by that.

Thats why I said "thats how I see it"

 

[klytus]

They are rather important for a girl. For a guy, most important thing is confidence and his ability to make a girl feel secure.

I think this confidence/security thing is severely overrated. I know lots of exceptions to this. Men who are neither confident nor able to provide security of any kind and get pretty, cute girls, ofttimes even successful girls, who apparently love them. Attraction is much more complex.

 

[gettingbetter]

I get so much mixed reactions from women, i honestly have no idea whats going on. It makes me wonder if i'm "not good enough", but at the same time "what if i am good enough" but not realising opportunities?

 

[jhanniffy]

Look are not important....someone who would put up with a girl like me would prob be woth it.....though I do like red heads ::

 

[NickyNacker]

I can't date someone unless I'm attracted to them. But they also have to have a good personality. It's equally important. I tend to be attracted to nerdy guys though, and I have a very unique taste lol

 

[Social_Monstrosity]

For guys, looks matter more than for girls IMO.

And if you're a guy, looks can only get you to a certain point...it's more important to know how to talk.

Not only am I ugly...I also don't know how to talk.

Awesome!