kristina303
Well-known member
I agree with Raichel. I admire you guys for just doing it. Thanks to you guys I'm calling a couple of people about some job openings tomorrow. 
I don't get it.
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1BlackSheep
Well-known member
Good luck, Kristina! I'm sure you'll land a job real soon!
kristina303
Well-known member
Thank you!
Engulfed707
Active member
like someone else said, it's all for that paycheck. right now i mostly find happiness through material things i find college assignments a little more endurable thinking about the big bucks to come my way in the future... but it's still a tough journey of course.
Basically though it's different for me when i'm actually interacting with people for a reason, rather than just to chit-chat.
i find college assignments a little more endurable thinking about the big bucks to come my way in the future... but it's still a tough journey of course.Basically though it's different for me when i'm actually interacting with people for a reason, rather than just to chit-chat.
Flanscho
Well-known member
I'm not afraid of people in general. I'm afraid of groups of people that might pay too much attention to me. Or expect things from me. I guess that got to do with mobbing experiences I made when I was a teenager.
Sure, if I could, I'd quit my job and just use my time to put my creativity into tangible forms. But someone got to pay the bills. So I work.
Sure, if I could, I'd quit my job and just use my time to put my creativity into tangible forms. But someone got to pay the bills. So I work.
Invisibleman
Well-known member
Because an Italian guy once told me "Ehh,lifes one fawgin crazy ass bitch. Shes a nonstop grind from birth til death and there aint nothin you or nobody else gonna do about it, shes a rollercoaster that you cant fawgin get off even if you wanted to so take whatcha gotta fawgin do,shut the fawg up and do it"
^truly words to live by.
^truly words to live by.
It's not so much a case of being able to do it or not being able to do it. It's a case of doing it or not doing. Anxiety and the motivation to work on it fluctuate a lot.
Like others have said here before, some just -have- for the sake of humane survival. Why you can't do it yet, is not for me to judge, it can be a number things. My distant advice would be to get something to motivate you. Something to make it worth the humiliation and pain.
Motivation can be fear, kids, love, fantasy, pride, integrity, pleasure, physical reward, lack of choice or attempt at personal improvement, and many others. What is important is that your motivation exceeds the intensity of the fear.
Like others have said here before, some just -have- for the sake of humane survival. Why you can't do it yet, is not for me to judge, it can be a number things. My distant advice would be to get something to motivate you. Something to make it worth the humiliation and pain.
Motivation can be fear, kids, love, fantasy, pride, integrity, pleasure, physical reward, lack of choice or attempt at personal improvement, and many others. What is important is that your motivation exceeds the intensity of the fear.
bcsr
Well-known member
What's the alternative?
You just suck it up, and do it. There's nothing physically preventing someone with social anxiety from working or going to school. Just set your mind to the task, and get it done. It *does* get easier.
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I agree with the other users. We don't have a choice because we have bills to pay, people to support, so we suck it up. I actually thought about joining the monastery and living a life of quiet solitude, but that's probably the last resort if I can't find a good job in the real world.
GraybeardGhost
Well-known member
I've found it helps to categorize the people with whom you work.
I used to work as a night manager in a sort of hotel, which required dealing with a lot of people. However, I was the only employee on my shift, and all the others were guests—a completely different category of person. Most of my working time was spent behind a big reception desk which stood solidly between me and the guests, but even when I had to go out among them, I took that desk with me psychologically. I was a staff member; they were guests. Whether I was providing some service, exercising my authority, or just passing the time, we were never equal or alike. By maintaining a certain "casual formality," being friendly, but not too familiar, I was able to set myself apart from the teeming masses and not get overwhelmed.
I had to deal with a number of volunteers as well, mostly at the beginning and end of my shifts, but they, again, were another category. I was staff, they were volunteers. No problem . . . until the annual party, that is, when all the hats came off and titles were set aside. It was a completely different social dynamic. They were still the same friendly, mature, confident adults, but I was reduced to little more than a scared kid hyperventilating in the corner. I was among some of the nicest people you could ever hope to meet, but I could not cope with them as equals.
Before that, I worked in a historic house/museum. Again, it was often just me there alone, except for occasional visitors and the resident ghosts. By mentally placing each group in its own basket, and thus isolating myself from them, I avoided the usual onslaught of anxiety. Unfortunately, I couldn't avoid the dusting.
I used to work as a night manager in a sort of hotel, which required dealing with a lot of people. However, I was the only employee on my shift, and all the others were guests—a completely different category of person. Most of my working time was spent behind a big reception desk which stood solidly between me and the guests, but even when I had to go out among them, I took that desk with me psychologically. I was a staff member; they were guests. Whether I was providing some service, exercising my authority, or just passing the time, we were never equal or alike. By maintaining a certain "casual formality," being friendly, but not too familiar, I was able to set myself apart from the teeming masses and not get overwhelmed.
I had to deal with a number of volunteers as well, mostly at the beginning and end of my shifts, but they, again, were another category. I was staff, they were volunteers. No problem . . . until the annual party, that is, when all the hats came off and titles were set aside. It was a completely different social dynamic. They were still the same friendly, mature, confident adults, but I was reduced to little more than a scared kid hyperventilating in the corner. I was among some of the nicest people you could ever hope to meet, but I could not cope with them as equals.
Before that, I worked in a historic house/museum. Again, it was often just me there alone, except for occasional visitors and the resident ghosts. By mentally placing each group in its own basket, and thus isolating myself from them, I avoided the usual onslaught of anxiety. Unfortunately, I couldn't avoid the dusting.
LazyHermitCrab
Well-known member
Well most of my classes are online except 1 and i don't work many hrs at work. It's not a job you can live on either. I barely talk at work and everyone knows this so ppl don't talk to me much except 1 coworker who i have stuff in common with but i don't like running into the coworker because i don't like to talk at work >.>
gustavofring
Well-known member
I guess at one point in life you don't have a choice.
Everyone has to have a job. It's just one of the realities of life. It's either that or become homeless (or on wellfare). On the positive side, a job can give fulfillment.
For years I didn't even know I had Social Anxiety (because I had no internet nor was I ever diagnosed by a Psychologist) but made it through highschool and started college, had jobs inbetween. I did have mild symptoms but I never really paid much attention to it. I guess I had a more confident outlook in those days. My depression of the last 2 years really brought it out much more.
I think living a sheltered life and spending too much time on the internet can definately worsen social anxiety.
Everyone has to have a job. It's just one of the realities of life. It's either that or become homeless (or on wellfare). On the positive side, a job can give fulfillment.
For years I didn't even know I had Social Anxiety (because I had no internet nor was I ever diagnosed by a Psychologist) but made it through highschool and started college, had jobs inbetween. I did have mild symptoms but I never really paid much attention to it. I guess I had a more confident outlook in those days. My depression of the last 2 years really brought it out much more.
I think living a sheltered life and spending too much time on the internet can definately worsen social anxiety.
JuiceB
Well-known member
Like others have said, I need the paycheck. I don't do well in interviews either. Lucky for me that my younger bro was already working for the company and that the manager at the time just needed another forklift driver. No interview. All I had to do was pass the drug screening.
I normally keep my mouth closed when working. Sometimes I have to tell someone to moved their truck or whatever but it's far from a conversation.
I normally keep my mouth closed when working. Sometimes I have to tell someone to moved their truck or whatever but it's far from a conversation.
Lisy
Active member
I agree with others who said there is no choice.
I study at the art academy, one of my teacher was really scary and during her lessons we had to show our artworks in front of everyone (luckily we were few students), I was always depressed and nervous because of it, but in the end I was able to pass the exam with a good result because I was more scared of failing and being harshly criticized by the teacher.
Studying there makes me very anxious because in many courses we have to show what we do, but I really like what I study and the thought of dropping out makes me feel worse, so I try to concentrate on what I like the most.
I loved "welcome to nhk" it's a great anime
I study at the art academy, one of my teacher was really scary and during her lessons we had to show our artworks in front of everyone (luckily we were few students), I was always depressed and nervous because of it, but in the end I was able to pass the exam with a good result because I was more scared of failing and being harshly criticized by the teacher.
Studying there makes me very anxious because in many courses we have to show what we do, but I really like what I study and the thought of dropping out makes me feel worse, so I try to concentrate on what I like the most.
I loved "welcome to nhk" it's a great anime
twiggle
Well-known member
Ehehehehe.
Well as what a couple of others have said I think it just depends on the type of anxiety...I can hold down a job and appear completely fine to other people but for me it's more what goes on inside... the anxious thoughts and worries about these things.
I went through a big phase of depression when I was unemployed, being employed somehow helps my anxiety as it keeps me busy and moving forward. It's strange because if you'd asked me back then I would have wondered how I could manage my anxiety alongside a job but actually having the work to do really helps... each day you have no choice but to go in and get on with things... I hope I'm never unemployed ever again!
PhantomPod
Well-known member
Because I need the money. I would just love to stay home 24/7, but I need money to pay my bills and live my life. I gotta pay for that Internet and cable bill somehow.
I also work in customer service. The job is mostly focused on answering emails, so I don't have to talk on the phone very often which is good considering I have terrible phone anxiety. But honestly, I don't talk too much at my job. I just sit at my desk with my headphones in working away and then I go home. Not a whole lot of interaction with others is needed. When I do need to talk on the phone or interact with co-workers, yes, I do get very anxious, but I just have to work through it because just being unemployed is not really an option if you want to pay your bills, buy nice things, and buy your own home one day.
I also work in customer service. The job is mostly focused on answering emails, so I don't have to talk on the phone very often which is good considering I have terrible phone anxiety. But honestly, I don't talk too much at my job. I just sit at my desk with my headphones in working away and then I go home. Not a whole lot of interaction with others is needed. When I do need to talk on the phone or interact with co-workers, yes, I do get very anxious, but I just have to work through it because just being unemployed is not really an option if you want to pay your bills, buy nice things, and buy your own home one day.