I don't get it.
- Thread starter kristina303
- Start date
this_portrait
Well-known member
I don't even get nervous at interviews anymore (not that it stops me from stumbling over my own words, though). As for school, well... Honestly, I don't even know how managed to plow through the first four years as an undergrad, when my mental health was at its worst. I guess motivation is all I need to push through my anxieties.
Facethefear
Well-known member
It is amazing what we can do when we absolutely have to. Not working is not an option for me. There are some anxious moments, but I carry on for that paycheque. By working and dealing with people I have learned how to do it. I think many people who "know" me would be surprised if they really knew how some things do not happen easily with me. Hope that makes sense and helps you a little.
chibiXphantom
Well-known member
i have to work. not an option not to. suprised i could land a job with my awkwardness and lack of communications skills, but i managed to pull through somehow (though i could tell the guy interviewing me was quite uncomfortable and awkward too). i'm a cashier, but i struggle with actually interacting with the customers. ill say 'hi' when i see them and tell them what im supposed to, but i cant make small talk and whatnot. and i hate when the customers try to joke around and be funny. idk how to react to that.
as far as school went (only went a year), when i wasnt in classes, i was sitting in the corner of the library drawing, or hiding away in the practice rooms so i could play piano in a secluded, small room. far away from people
as far as school went (only went a year), when i wasnt in classes, i was sitting in the corner of the library drawing, or hiding away in the practice rooms so i could play piano in a secluded, small room. far away from people
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vj288
not actually Fiona Apple
You know, I bet there are a lot of people reading this and thinking "how can these people post on this forum and have SA?! I can never reply to a thread, let alone make one myself!" It really comes at different degrees for different people, everyone with their own comfort zones and what they can and cannot do.
Well, I should change that, we can do anything some things are just too much sometimes. I could go around talking excessively to everyone I see it would just be very, very, very difficult for me.
As far as school is concerned, you would be surprised how little you need to talk during it, if you pick the right classes you could go the whole day in silence.
My first job I got without an interview, and it was one that required very little talking. I just showed up, washed the dishes, and left. No communication required, a dream come true at the time :
:
I have been to interviews since then, I really need a job and money so that takes priority over my anxiety. My mindset is once I get to the interview I cannot back-out or run away, so I must speak. And I am not mute and understand language, so I am able to I know. And the more I do the easier they get. That unknown is what usually makes things hard for me to do, there are a lot of things in life I still haven't gain enough comfort with to do easily because I do not know exactly how to do them, or what is proper. Best skill I could use to learn is probably what to do when I don't know what to do, what to say when I don't know what to say. Then all my bases would be covered.
Well, I should change that, we can do anything some things are just too much sometimes. I could go around talking excessively to everyone I see it would just be very, very, very difficult for me.
As far as school is concerned, you would be surprised how little you need to talk during it, if you pick the right classes you could go the whole day in silence.
My first job I got without an interview, and it was one that required very little talking. I just showed up, washed the dishes, and left. No communication required, a dream come true at the time :
:I have been to interviews since then, I really need a job and money so that takes priority over my anxiety. My mindset is once I get to the interview I cannot back-out or run away, so I must speak. And I am not mute and understand language, so I am able to I know. And the more I do the easier they get. That unknown is what usually makes things hard for me to do, there are a lot of things in life I still haven't gain enough comfort with to do easily because I do not know exactly how to do them, or what is proper. Best skill I could use to learn is probably what to do when I don't know what to do, what to say when I don't know what to say. Then all my bases would be covered.
1BlackSheep
Well-known member
I read this article today which really hit home, as it was something I experienced all the time when working for one of the major internet companies here in Silicon Valley. Honestly, it is one of the reasons I ended up leaving! I get asked all the time why I wanted to leave such a seemingly great company (and the implication that I must be crazy), but unless you've experienced what it's like to have SA, I suppose it's hard to fathom. They just don't understand! ::
@OBrien: The sociology of risk and the dark side of dot-com parties - San Jose Mercury News
:@OBrien: The sociology of risk and the dark side of dot-com parties - San Jose Mercury News
@ vj I concur! I want to quote everything you just said but that might be too much quoting. It's really great to hear you say this. It's made me smile. And I'm really happy for you that the necessary challenge of work has had such a positive outcome. I remember how freaked out you were over that interview, I'm so glad that it gotten easier!
It's really great to hear you say this. It's made me smile. And I'm really happy for you that the necessary challenge of work has had such a positive outcome. I remember how freaked out you were over that interview, I'm so glad that it gotten easier!
MNM322
Well-known member
I am content in some situations...like if I know people or its a small group. I can be chatty or silly etc
However, at work I ALWAYS am quiet and fear people are watching me and judging me. I have a hard time keeping jobs.
Currently I work at home though, which is wonderful
However, at work I ALWAYS am quiet and fear people are watching me and judging me. I have a hard time keeping jobs.
Currently I work at home though, which is wonderful
razzle dazzle rose
Well-known member
I do not work. I do not go to school. It affects the quality of my life tremendously. I am not able to move forward. Most people, even those without SA, work because of that paycheck; because without any money there can be no plans, no moving forward. I keep telling myself that, but still can't get myself to react. It is like I don't care, but I care so much.
I used to have a job. I used to be a student. Even then, it was really hard most days. I had a horrible time at work; I would skip so many classes...I was always just trying to keep myself from falling apart. That took up all of my energy.
There are levels. In my life I have experienced many...right now I am in one of the worst phases of my life. I have to believe that it will get better, or else I will go crazy.
I used to have a job. I used to be a student. Even then, it was really hard most days. I had a horrible time at work; I would skip so many classes...I was always just trying to keep myself from falling apart. That took up all of my energy.
There are levels. In my life I have experienced many...right now I am in one of the worst phases of my life. I have to believe that it will get better, or else I will go crazy.
PopulationZero
Active member
i don't have social anxiety bad enough to not socialize... if that makes sense. I am little shy, but so far all of my co-workers like me they probably would't if they found out that i was a misanthrope... who knows
they probably would't if they found out that i was a misanthrope... who knows Razzlecherry
Banned
i don't have social anxiety bad enough to not socialize... if that makes sense. I am little shy, but so far all of my co-workers like me
Who knows if they'll like you if they find out you hate them?
PopulationZero
Active member
I don't hate individuals, I just hate the human mind in general. otherwise, I wouldn't enjoy being on forums and talking to others
GarbageOfTruth
Member
It has gotten much easier over time. In school, I got by by not speaking a word to anyone unless absolutely forced to. It was so difficult, however, that I cried every morning when I woke up and realized it was time to go to school again.
In college, I became more comfortable as I got deeper into the English major. I became obsessed with literature and writing, so that when I did have to speak in class, I felt more confident and that I had something worthwhile to say. If I knew I was going to have to speak in class on a certain day, I would wear high-collared shirts, since my chest gets bright red splotches when I'm nervous.
In the job where I've worked for the last three years, I work from home and rarely leave the house. Most days, I don't see the sun. My coworkers are mostly introverted people as well, and on days when we do go to the office, we don't talk to each other much.
I do feel I got very lucky in finding a job like this, but I'm not quite so anxious anymore that I feel I need to be isolated this much. Telecommuting is growing, and I think and hope that someday soon, most people will be able to work from their homes.
In college, I became more comfortable as I got deeper into the English major. I became obsessed with literature and writing, so that when I did have to speak in class, I felt more confident and that I had something worthwhile to say. If I knew I was going to have to speak in class on a certain day, I would wear high-collared shirts, since my chest gets bright red splotches when I'm nervous.
In the job where I've worked for the last three years, I work from home and rarely leave the house. Most days, I don't see the sun. My coworkers are mostly introverted people as well, and on days when we do go to the office, we don't talk to each other much.
I do feel I got very lucky in finding a job like this, but I'm not quite so anxious anymore that I feel I need to be isolated this much. Telecommuting is growing, and I think and hope that someday soon, most people will be able to work from their homes.