I came to a realization

freestylemonster

freestylemonster

Banned
Lately I've been thinking more and more that people suck. People are mean, people are shallow and people only care about themselves. It's because of this way of thinking that I haven't even bothered to try getting over my SA lately.

The thing is, my outgoing, super friendly friend (we'll call him Jimbo) always tells me about conversations that he has with strangers - cashiers, people in his class, etc. - and he always describes them as "Super nice" or "really friendly". So what I've figured out is that it's not other people who are mean and shallow....it's me. I'm the one who doesn't give anybody else the time of day. I'm the shallow one. I'm super picky and always look for reasons not to try to make friends with someone.

So I've decided I'm kicking my personal development into full gear. I'm going to smile to people that I pass on the street, maybe make small talk with store clerks etc. and once I start doing that, like Jimbo, I'll have a new perspective on life and people. Maybe I'll even end up making new friends! Or maybe I'll get a girlfriend! I know it sounds a little optimistic but, what can I say, I'm an optimist :)
 
L

Lccska

Well-known member
Congratulations! You may be on to something there. I'm a Dialysis Nurse. I work with people who have severe health problems. I'm always amazed at their ability to be pleasant, even funny. And most of them have wonderful, caring Families. There are really wonderful people in this world. I bet you're even 1 of them if you let your true self shine.
 
JamesSmith

JamesSmith

Well-known member
freestylemonster said:
Lately I've been thinking more and more that people suck. People are mean, people are shallow and people only care about themselves.
Click to expand...

Welcome to the real world. Nobody understands the real world until they understand this. Not all people are mean or selfish, but many are.
 
K

Kinetik

Well-known member
It's true. I notice more and more that it's important to reach out first if you want to connect with people and be treated positively. First impressions are everything - that's the image that people will keep recalling whenever they think back to you. In that regard, there's nothing more effective than taking the initiative and putting a big smile on.

Shame about the fictitious name, though. Jimbo, really? ::p:
 
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philly2bits

philly2bits

Well-known member
Congrats Freestyle. It's good to see someone take responsibility for their own attitudes instead of blaming the rest of society.
 
Kiwong

Kiwong

Well-known member
I like your thinking Freestyle.

Smiling, being happy, a nice word here and there, a dollop of encouragment can spread like a virus.

You feel good, they feel better. Win Win.
 
Phoenixx

Phoenixx

Well-known member
Awesome post, Freestyle! :) You sound like me a few years back. Growing up, when I was starting into SA and depression all I thought was that people sucked. They were horrible, mean, stupid, etc. And I came to the same realization. It was all me. I felt intimidated by people, always had a guard up. I avoided people too, and also felt that no one cared about me. Now, I carry and present myself differently. I don't totally go out of my way though to talk to someone, as I'm still pretty anxious, but I'm nice to anyone who starts a conversation. I'm not as willing to put my guard up around people, and I'm always willing to lend an ear and say a few words myself to those who talk to me.
 
A

AGR

Well-known member
I dont know about anyone else's but my experience wasnt quite like this, when I was being friendly,I was always open,but I have been betrayed for status,ridiculed,walked over and mostly taken advantage of,yes if you are popular,good looking or is being fake most people will be nice to you and there are also truly nice people,I guess its a risk you have to take,funny none of this made me truly angry, more like sad at myself and at people.
 
madmike

madmike

Well-known member
What really annoys me is when some else introduces someone as 'super nice', and then i meet them and think they're the complete opposite. I guess you're probably right though, smiling more is definitely a good philosophy! (but sometimes its quite difficult...)
 
pinkputter

pinkputter

Well-known member
loves it. great post.

i just have this to add: "if you see someone without a smile, give 'em yours."-the one and only Dolly Parton. love that quote.
 
vj288

vj288

not actually Fiona Apple
freestylemonster said:
Lately I've been thinking more and more that people suck. People are mean, people are shallow and people only care about themselves. It's because of this way of thinking that I haven't even bothered to try getting over my SA lately.

The thing is, my outgoing, super friendly friend (we'll call him Jimbo) always tells me about conversations that he has with strangers - cashiers, people in his class, etc. - and he always describes them as "Super nice" or "really friendly". So what I've figured out is that it's not other people who are mean and shallow....it's me. I'm the one who doesn't give anybody else the time of day. I'm the shallow one. I'm super picky and always look for reasons not to try to make friends with someone.

So I've decided I'm kicking my personal development into full gear. I'm going to smile to people that I pass on the street, maybe make small talk with store clerks etc. and once I start doing that, like Jimbo, I'll have a new perspective on life and people. Maybe I'll even end up making new friends! Or maybe I'll get a girlfriend! I know it sounds a little optimistic but, what can I say, I'm an optimist :)
Click to expand...

I think everyone needs a friend like Jimbo, he's one smart dude :cool:
 
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