Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
lucky you
:bigsmile: Good thing I can laugh about it. I wouldn’t be if I just lost a document or song idea when my laptop crashed. :sad:
How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
:bigsmile: Good thing I can laugh about it. I wouldn’t be if I just lost a document or song idea when my laptop crashed. :sad:
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Another day, another petty f*cking ”Ye dinnae care aboot me! F*ck off ! F*ck the lotta yous !” argument. I’m paraphrasing, but those always the main points. Yay! Thanks a lot, big sis... ya f*ckin’ dough-heid! How’s about acting like an adult for once, huh? No? :kickingmyself:
And she still wonders why I’ve opted to eat my Christmas dinner alone for the last 12 years.mg:
Ah’ll tell ye summit, my family are in for a rude awakening when ah pack up n’ leave. As soon as I get an offer for an accessible flat or bungalow - I’m going. Because ah cannae be f*cked waste ma time or breathe articulating why ah turned oot the way I did. As well as the rest o’ them... They never listen anyway.
And she still wonders why I’ve opted to eat my Christmas dinner alone for the last 12 years.
mg:Ah’ll tell ye summit, my family are in for a rude awakening when ah pack up n’ leave. As soon as I get an offer for an accessible flat or bungalow - I’m going. Because ah cannae be f*cked waste ma time or breathe articulating why ah turned oot the way I did. As well as the rest o’ them... They never listen anyway.
Marc7
Well-known member
Well for me it because of the fear of the unknown, not wanting to feel inferior, not wanting to feel anxious, and i'm behind in it.
That's good she is on your side now.
Oh, I hope you teach her.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
I can definitely relate.
Certainly makes up for all those previous years when she, as well as our mother, would just laugh at me for getting pissed off and just go off on these angry expletive ladder rants about why I never got along with my older sister and how our mother is so tame when arguing with her. Well, until recently. And yet, she was always quick to shout me down if I started an similar argument where my opening question was: “Why?”
I’m going to try and teach her, once I get my stuff moved back into my bedroom. I just hope we don’t have any arguments over the songs she wants to learn.
mg: I mean as far as what notes and how the songs is played. I’m not having a repeat of what happened when I tried to one of my old schoolmates the electric guitar. And the young lad argued with me over a certain chord not being part of a song he wanted me to teach him. :kickingmyself:
Marc7
Well-known member
Does anybody know how to deal with anxiety and fear of the unknown? Also how to let things come without feeling anxious (news, music, sports, YouTube videos and comments, and people talking)? Because I get anxious when I see, read, or hear those things I mentioned in the last sentence. But not all the time though for certain things but I still avoid those things. Also I avoid those things because I don't want to feel inferior. I know this is not only about how I feel but I needed help with something.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
I’m still trying to figure that out myself. Exposure therapy? Maybe work on your self-esteem would help deal with feeling inferior? Though, I can relate to feeling that way. Meditation is another good one? Sorry, these are just a few things I’ve tried over the years...
Oh, and not having an overly negative mindset. Like, all the time. Don’t go into a situation thinking the worst is going to happen, otherwise you’ll just dwell on that and make yourself more anxious.
FountainandFairfax
in a VAN down by the RIVER
I forced myself to sleep through most of the weekend.
Weekends suck, they make me feel trapped... correction, weekends trap me.
Weekends suck, they make me feel trapped... correction, weekends trap me.
theslowesthand
Banned
That's me everyday right there.
And for the cream on the cake, had a headache that lasted for hours, not affected by headache pills, and sore eyes, and almost nausea. Must have consumed something bad.
With the weather getting cooler, easing into winter, my general energy is sinking. It always happens each year. I'm also worried me running out of meds may be affecting my energy a bit at least.
vj288
not actually Fiona Apple
I'm a little tipsy after a day out (I keep winning free concert tickets, it's forcing me out of the house!) and for the first time in a long time it makes me feel not awful, and actually good. I don't mean that as a reason to start drinking way more often, but it is good that when my inhibitions are down and my true colors shine through that underneath all my levels for once there is something other than hopelessness and misery.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Not sure how ah should be feeling. My mother just berated me for leaving my watch on the table by the house phone before I went to get a shower... :kickingmyself: mg: :idontknow:
And the older sister is apparently feeling "suicidal" lately. Really!? Our mother seemed to manage raising three kids by herself. Varied results, obviously, but she f*ckin' did it! Yet, last year, she had the nerve to say I was being "overly dramatic" when I said out loud after failing to defuse an tense argument that I feel like killing myself cuz of the shite ah huv to put with from her and rest of my family.
:kickingmyself: mg: :idontknow: And the older sister is apparently feeling "suicidal" lately. Really!? Our mother seemed to manage raising three kids by herself. Varied results, obviously, but she f*ckin' did it! Yet, last year, she had the nerve to say I was being "overly dramatic" when I said out loud after failing to defuse an tense argument that I feel like killing myself cuz of the shite ah huv to put with from her and rest of my family.
Marc7
Well-known member
That's good to know someone is like me.
Your sister who is on your side now was on your side recently? Also which sister was the one who shouted you down when you started a similar argument?
I’m going to try and teach her, once I get my stuff moved back into my bedroom. I just hope we don’t have any arguments over the songs she wants to learn.
I hope so too.
Marc7
Well-known member
How do you suggest I expose myself and build my self esteem up? Mediation is like deep breathing and visualizing a calm place right?
So think positive most of the time? Thank you btw.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, it depends what you want to overcome? Since you did mention a fair bit that you feel anxious about. And you won't really get over the anxiety if you don't expose yourself to what making you anxious, y'know?
But don't feel you need to overcome those in a one single All or nothing go. Take it one issue at a time.
I guess you could start by challenging those thoughts and feelings of inferiority? By which I mean stop putting yourself down as much, thinking negativity of yourself.
:thumbup: Yeah. I just mentioned it as more of technique for helping with anxiety, especially if it tends to overwhelm you. Not in the sense of going total Zen Buddhist, sitting cross-legged atop a mountain. :bigsmile:
Kinda. Or more to point, don't allow your anxiety to keep you in that "Something bad is going to happen. This is going to be a failure" mindset. It is normal to feel anxious about new situations, or have that fear of the unknown. Especially if you're doing something you've never done before.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Oh, believe you're not the only one struggling with anxiety and fear of the unknown. I've been trying to overcome those same issues from a young age.
Yeah, because my oldest sister actually agrees with my point that I'd just be better moving out of the family home. Since our mother is refusing to allow things to go back to how they were before my older sister moved back in.
Because, despite recently get a house of her own and saying she'd get into a routine. My mother is insisting on having my older sister and her kids around to visit everyday. :thumbdown: It's like they never moved out. :kickingmyself:
Oh, my older sister - the middle sibling. Last summer, when I stormed half way the stairs after be awakened by the sound her shouting her head off over how much my mother bought when out shopping for food that day. And I had the nerve to straight-up ask her, in front of our mother and oldest sister, why she always feels the need to get overly aggressive and yell every time she starts an argument? Let just say, the response that accompanied my question proved that I was right about her tendency to get aggressive and shout for no reason during arguments.
Same here. But, right now, I'm too down and depressed to even pick-up my own electric guitar, let alone teach someone else how to play a similar instrument. :sad: It's not a great feeling when yer own mother tells you, outright, that you and your well-being don't really matter to her. :crying:
Kiwong
Well-known member
Warning sickenly positive post ahead.
Maybe I am becoming social - I am discovering good things can happen when being social, like talking with someone until you laugh so hard tears fall from your eyes. When you go through hard time someone is there to ask how are you?
Just to have a conversation that you didn't stuff up.
To have the balls to play guitar and sing - and for the people listening to say I was good. And they see you in a different light, a skill that is authentically you - and smile and respond better to you, their opinions change. You are no longer defined by your anxiety.
A sense of belief fill you, maybe I am not hopeless after all. The world around you begins to shift and your attitude does to, because you had the guts to expose yourself.
Maybe I am becoming social - I am discovering good things can happen when being social, like talking with someone until you laugh so hard tears fall from your eyes. When you go through hard time someone is there to ask how are you?
Just to have a conversation that you didn't stuff up.
To have the balls to play guitar and sing - and for the people listening to say I was good. And they see you in a different light, a skill that is authentically you - and smile and respond better to you, their opinions change. You are no longer defined by your anxiety.
A sense of belief fill you, maybe I am not hopeless after all. The world around you begins to shift and your attitude does to, because you had the guts to expose yourself.
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Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
:idontknow: Today, my older sister actually did the unthinkable and... acknowledged that our mother isn’t living in the family house by herself.
Well, that’ll probably change when I move out, which will likely be next year at this point. Still nay word on any accessible housing accommodation being available for me yet. But I’ve finally decided to start packing some stuff up now, just in case. Plan ahead...
But, still, it’s nice to finally get acknowledged, after nearly a year, rather than disregarded just because I’m rarely seen about the house. What can I say, I like my solitude.
Well, that’ll probably change when I move out, which will likely be next year at this point. Still nay word on any accessible housing accommodation being available for me yet. But I’ve finally decided to start packing some stuff up now, just in case. Plan ahead...
But, still, it’s nice to finally get acknowledged, after nearly a year, rather than disregarded just because I’m rarely seen about the house. What can I say, I like my solitude.
theslowesthand
Banned
I'm not thinking about how bad/empty/etc my life is, i'm just feeling it. I'm avoiding thinking about it, diverting my attention from reality whenever i can. That's all i think i can do.
theslowesthand
Banned
I'm disappointed with my personality. I feel it hasn't developed as it should have, due to all my social isolation & lack of relationships & many years of poor emotional health/well-being.
theslowesthand
Banned
Sick of certain things in my life, but "unable" to replace them with new/better things. Stuck in the old patterns.