Well a've got hope & worry/despair in equal measure. But judging by how i've becoming more hopeful in past couple weeks, i think given some more time & confronting/experiencing my worries, that those worries will diminish. I mean, worries are about the future, & when the future becomes the present, the worries tend to quickly subside.
One such worry is how i'm gonna fill in the days, as at present i dont want to do hardly anything at all, and thats boring as hell. I have no idea how i'll spend my days when i go flatting. The only idea is to set up my old PS2 & play games. Also being in town, i will in theory be able to walk to various places of interest (eg walk to a cafe & have a coffee & cake, walk to the movie theatre to watch a movie, i dunno). I've always lived out in the country. I'm also worried that the noises will "get" to me (cars/etc & also my flatmates & their visitors). So i have all these worries about flatting, and those will probably remain until the future becomes the present & i can prove to myself that i can "handle" those things. Also, when i lived with my parents, i used to stay in my room most of the time. I think it may be a tough ask for me to change from a total hermit to somebody who can be around people; its a big change to my personality. Also i have pretty severe mood issues - often i have bad days.