Well I was feeling good cause I was asleep and dreaming that I had a case made out of hemp for my tablet computer then I woke up and realized it was another day in my sad life and that made me feel deflated.
I'm feeling awful...so today there was a party organized from our company at a pub...and I didn't go....my colleagues really wanted me to join but I backed out...they would be having fun, dancing at the disc and I went to a bar a and drank alone....I really don't know what's wrong with me...seems I don't feel happy 🙁
The world is not always to blame, sometimes I've got to take responsibility for the shit that comes out from between my ears. That's where all the mayhem starts.
The world is not always to blame, sometimes I've got to take responsibility for the shit that comes out from between my ears. That's where all the mayhem starts.
What happened? Sometimes we forget to use the filter between the mind and the mouth. We've all been there. 🤭
I had a couple of friends come up from Melbourne. It was great to see them, but now they're gone. This coming week will be another busy one, especially tomorrow with lots of university commitments.
I feel like I’m living every day just waiting to die. There isn’t a point to my existence, I’m simply here waiting it out until it’s all over and done with. There is no excitement or thrill to life. Living, breathing, being conscious is just some horrible neverending chore. I’m not really living right now anyways, sitting around doing nothing all day is not living. I may be alive and breathing physically, but I feel dead in a way. I’m not here because I want to be, and I’m definitely not enjoying any of it. There is nothing to look forward to but more days filled with endless fear and anxiety. I’m starting to think I am beyond the point of help, past the point of ever changing myself in any way. I feel meh. I really don’t want this life.
I feel like I’m living every day just waiting to die. There isn’t a point to my existence, I’m simply here waiting it out until it’s all over and done with. There is no excitement or thrill to life. Living, breathing, being conscious is just some horrible neverending chore. I’m not really living right now anyways, sitting around doing nothing all day is not living. I may be alive and breathing physically, but I feel dead in a way. I’m not here because I want to be, and I’m definitely not enjoying any of it. There is nothing to look forward to but more days filled with endless fear and anxiety. I’m starting to think I am beyond the point of help, past the point of ever changing myself in any way. I feel meh. I really don’t want this life.
I've been feeling like this for a while now. I've given up on changing. Although I am trying to learn to let go and not give a s*** about anything. But the flipside of that is when you do that nothing means anything anymore. Nothing is special. You just kind of exist like a zombie. I can't imagine feeling in love again or being excited over a new purchase or anything really.
Feeling quite weird today; it was cold and foggy first thing until the fog lifted quickly, now its sunny. Went for a walk along a track, still feeling half-asleep. Strangers kept saying "morning" as they passed, a white heron flew from the treetops, black swans slept in the warm morning sun and tibetan prayer flags fluttered on a bush. On the water a man standing on his board paddled past and a ship in the distance sounded its horn loudly. It felt surreal, so many unusual sights, and I wondered if I was dreaming, or perhaps had died in the night and this was the next place.
I feel kind of down and bored today. There are things I need to do, but feel insecure about getting them done; and there are things that I want to be, but am no closer as of yet, like renting a place of my own, making some good female friends to hang out with, etc. I try to be positive! lol
Feeling quite weird today; it was cold and foggy first thing until the fog lifted quickly, now its sunny. Went for a walk along a track, still feeling half-asleep. Strangers kept saying "morning" as they passed, a white heron flew from the treetops, black swans slept in the warm morning sun and tibetan prayer flags fluttered on a bush. On the water a man standing on his board paddled past and a ship in the distance sounded its horn loudly. It felt surreal, so many unusual sights, and I wondered if I was dreaming, or perhaps had died in the night and this was the next place.
^ That sounds spooky, kihira
I am sick of feeling so emotionally volatile.
My thoughts can be close to making me want to pack it all in and end the torment, early in the morning, then by lunch time I can be not too bad, then by night time I get a burst of energy and end up in a positive frame of mind.
Then the next morning it's back on the emotional roller coaster for a completely different sequenced ride through the next day and so on.:sad:
Feeling like I might end up going officially crazy soon, for real.
I feel like I’m living every day just waiting to die. There isn’t a point to my existence, I’m simply here waiting it out until it’s all over and done with. There is no excitement or thrill to life. Living, breathing, being conscious is just some horrible neverending chore. I’m not really living right now anyways, sitting around doing nothing all day is not living. I may be alive and breathing physically, but I feel dead in a way. I’m not here because I want to be, and I’m definitely not enjoying any of it. There is nothing to look forward to but more days filled with endless fear and anxiety. I’m starting to think I am beyond the point of help, past the point of ever changing myself in any way. I feel meh. I really don’t want this life.
Well, it's ma birthday today. 26 years old. Yay! Ah've finallly surpassed ma shoe size. :bigsmile: Man, I feel old
Though, fae a physical point uh view, ah've no' daein' too well. In fact ah'll like S, star, star, T! Huv'nae felt right since Saturday morning. Ah woke up wi' a sore lower back and a migraine heidache, and slight vertigo. Then, a few hours later, ah got food poisoning after eatin' a chicken sandwich - at least, I think that what ah've got. Gettin' diarrhoea as a result. Ma stomach huz been in agony since ah got back fae that comedy gig in Glasgow. Hud a ticket to see Glaswegian stand-up comedian and magician Jerry Sadowitz - let's just say he's no' the kinda comedian ye take yer muther tae see. :ironicsmile: Ah went against ma better judgement, like, but only because ah didnae want miss it.
So, anyway, Saturday night and much of Sunday morning were sleepless. And involved me gettin' up 'n' gan tae the toilet every half an hour to an hour. Doesnae help that am totally knackered fae the lack uh sleep. Needless tae ah've been bed-ridden fur nearly 3 days.
Well, it's ma birthday today. 26 years old. Yay! Ah've finallly surpassed ma shoe size. :bigsmile: Man, I feel old
Though, fae a physical point uh view, ah've no' daein' too well. In fact ah'll like S, star, star, T! Huv'nae felt right since Saturday morning. Ah woke up wi' a sore lower back and a migraine heidache, and slight vertigo. Then, a few hours later, ah got food poisoning after eatin' a chicken sandwich - at least, I think that what ah've got. Gettin' diarrhoea as a result. Ma stomach huz been in agony since ah got back fae that comedy gig in Glasgow. Hud a ticket to see Glaswegian stand-up comedian and magician Jerry Sadowitz - let's just say he's no' the kinda comedian ye take yer mutherhttp://www.socialphobiaworld.com/newreply.php?do=newreply&p=782216# tae see. :ironicsmile: Ah went against ma better judgement, like, but only because ah didnae want miss it.
So, anyway, Saturday night and much of Sunday morning were sleepless. And involved me gettin' up 'n' gan tae the toilet every half an hour to an hour. Doesnae help that am totally knackered fae the lack uh sleep. Needless tae ah've been bed-ridden fur nearly 3 days.
Happy Birthday man! Hope you had a good one. 26 is still young you know :thumbup:
Ah guess it is - ah just feel older than that fur some reason. :idontknow: Mibbe being telt ah wuz mature fur ma age when ah wuz 14 and that ah look older than I am wuz the reason?
It's a New Moon but I feel so horrible. I try to be positive but the negative thoughts come right back. I just want to be done with life. I won't be any good to my son. No one will make who I want him to be but who the hell am I? I can't do anythin anymore. I can't communicate. I can't think right. There is just nothing to life for me anymore. **** this.
How am i feeling? I feel like quitting this stupid job and trading my vehicles off for a couple old panhead Harley Davidson bikes and riding off into the sunset with the kids. I, the once rebellious soul, have just about had enough of the establishment and all the lies and suppressive rules. I'm about over it.
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