Exhausted. Weary. Trying to keep my resolve to pull through these hard times and make my life better (and my family's lives). I don't know what I'm fighting for - I guess just some peace of mind and less chaotic dysfunction - but I have to keep going because sitting around depressed accomplishes nothing, even though it temporarily feels better.
Pretty good, but I only wish I could stop dwelling on the future once and for all.
Just 2 weeks after my first date and 1 week after the girl said: "you're a cool guy but let's stay friends", yesterday I asked out another girl I've been talking to lately...
A friend of mine on this forum gave me an advice: "Prepare for the worst, but have some hope for the best things to happen." This is what's impossible for me, "I got my mind set" on her. For example I'm not that talkative, I easily get nervous, this might be a reason that would make her get tossed away from me, when this would happen I'd be pretty sad and would start to hate myself or something.
You may think I'm just a really negative guy, maybe I just think I differ sooo much from everyone else. Just because I'm isolated from people, relationships, and everything could be an obstacle for getting to know a girl more at least it is my fear... Or in other words because I'm actually an indoor type it makes the possible wide range of common interests somewhat invisible, maybe I'm paranoid or think too much, but I hope you get it...
I'm back! From North Carolina. Not outer space. I have never been so happy to be home. Unfortunately it was just in time to get sick. :\ I had a wonderful time in the Tar Heel State, but it's time to get back to life. And that starts with a job interview on Monday! I'm nervous as usual, but I'm curious to see what this place has to offer. Having a job, even if it's just for the holidays, will give me some extra money. And maybe it will lead to something longer.
Hey Daniel, congrats on having a first date AND asking out antoher girl. It sounds like you're on a roll when it comes to taking steps to have a relationship, and having courage.
overtired
unmotivated
confused about myself
disappointed in who I am
dead inside
Phocas 🙁
Even a metal rooster couldn't cheer you up?
I'm sorry you feel this way, please pm me when you feel like it would benefit you to spill out feelings! Anytime.
I'm back! From North Carolina. Not outer space. I have never been so happy to be home. Unfortunately it was just in time to get sick. :\ I had a wonderful time in the Tar Heel State, but it's time to get back to life. And that starts with a job interview on Monday! I'm nervous as usual, but I'm curious to see what this place has to offer. Having a job, even if it's just for the holidays, will give me some extra money. And maybe it will lead to something longer.
Well after my drama of last night my heads definitely a lot clearer, I'm not in a dark place anymore. I am still in bed though because I'm not ready to see my parents yet.
Depressed as f**k! Generally unhappy, but then 2012 has been a really s**te year for me.
I feel what little progress I made in trying tae overcome my problems has been for nothing, really. I mean, CBT hasn't helped me much. Am startin' tae feel like quite pessimistic. Actually, tae tell ye the truth, I'm seriously questioning why I even bothered tae seek help. Because, ultimately, it's been a waste o' time.
Best thing I can do is keep it all bottled up, because it ain't worse talkin' when no-one is listening. I know, that's no' an ideal solution but... outside of here, what else can I do? :sad:
Depressed as f**k! Generally unhappy, but then 2012 has been a really s**te year for me.
I feel what little progress I made in trying tae overcome my problems has been for nothing, really. I mean, CBT hasn't helped me much. Am startin' tae feel like quite pessimistic. Actually, tae tell ye the truth, I'm seriously questioning why I even bothered tae seek help. Because, ultimately, it's been a waste o' time.
Best thing I can do is keep it all bottled up, because it ain't worse talkin' when no-one is listening. I know, that's no' an ideal solution but... outside of here, what else can I do? :sad:
I'm really sorry Graeme. It does seem like a tough year for you. If you feel the need to talk I'm here.
I just want to feel normal again, like I'm not some kind of freak.
Do you guys think I'm a freak? lol.
Why am I even asking, like it's going to help, like I haven't asked this of how many people many time
Naw, that's no a question I ask a lot of folk, maself. :bigsmile: But, anyway...
I don't think yer a freak, Opaline. Not at all! In fact, you're beautiful, lovely, awesome person. I think many people on here would agree with me on that...? But I can understand where yer comin' from.
Sorry, if ye think am talkin' s**t, by the way. But there's a good reason for that, am really, really drunk right now.
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