I was feeling pretty good this morning, but now I'm just getting worn out from listening to people already. (No, not from anyone on here at all) Mentally and emotionally it's hard living here. For me it is, especially since I deal with anxiety and depression myself. Not trying to feel sorry for myself in any way here, or make myself look like I have it incredibly bad (Which I don't. I do have my down days though). The thing is though is when you have to listen to your cousin's bipolar moments, listen to every rude thing she says whether it's about me or someone else, and watch every single one of her symptoms as she spirals out of control, it's extremely tiring. It hurts to know that I TRY to help and I can't do a thing, so all I can do is stand on the side and watch, listen, and try to avoid and ignore the best I can. Oh, and even though I experience it anyway, I also have to deal with my mother giving me long talks about how she "annoys/pisses her off" and how "she wishes she'd move out." And again, I've been trying to convince my mom to TALK to her, tell her about her issues and convince her to go get help. She told me today that "she can't talk to her." My reply was that if she wasn't going to at least try and talk to her, then to not come running to me to complain about every little thing she does that annoys her and pisses her off. It's like I'm completely caught in the middle here and I don't even know what to do or how long I can even take it.
